the Earl flashback

[alec716]

Ennis even states in the motel room in 1967 "Dad made sure I seen it. Took me to see it. Me and K.E. Dad laughed about it. Hell, for all I know he done the job. If he was alive and was to put his head in that door right now you bet he'd go get his tire iron. Two guys livin together? No. All I can see is we get together once in a while way the hell out in the back a nowhere -- "

As someone who has worked with physically and emotionally abused children for 15 years, I can only imagine the psychic impact upon Ennis from witnessing the body AND believing that, even if his father didn't commit that killing, that he was capable of doing so.  As a former gay child (the chlid part is former, the gay part remains curent!) who paid careful attention to the few adult gay role models available, I can only imagine young Ennis' horror at the killing regardless of who committed it.  Sometimes, as frustrated as I have felt that Ennis could not move past his inhibitions and fears during Jack's lifetime, I am amazed that Ennis could function in a relationship at all with Jack.  He must have loved that man something powerful to set his fears aside, even to the limited extent that he did.  That's why I believe that "I swear"  ends with ... and I would be braver and be with you more if I had another chance.

[serious crayons]

Sometimes, as frustrated as I have felt that Ennis could not move past his inhibitions and fears during Jack's lifetime, I am amazed that Ennis could function in a relationship at all with Jack.  He must have loved that man something powerful to set his fears aside, even to the limited extent that he did.

I know. That's why I don't like it when people "blame" Ennis for not acting differently -- by his standards, from his point of view, in the context of what he knew, he took some big risks for love.

[alec716]

I know. That's why I don't like it when people "blame" Ennis for not acting differently -- by his standards, from his point of view, in the context of what he knew, he took some big risks for love.

Yes, and I think that the risks were very large, in light of Ennis' lifelong emotional and financial disempowerment.  He was willing to take time away from his wife and daughters, bargain with employers (which he was not willing to do to please Alma, as the grocery store scene shows), quit jobs, and (I believe most significantly of all) confront the violent and fearsome ghost of his hateful father in order to be with Jack to a larger extent than others in his shoes might have been willing or able to do.  He NEEDED Jack, and he knew it, and he never tried to deny it.  He was simply, tragically unable to act on the need as much as he wanted to.

I wonder just how much of a flashback to his own father Ennis had when confronted with the Stud Duck's venom across the kitchen table after Jack's death.  Just as his own father metaphorically spit on young Ennis' dignity by ingraining a homophobic self-loathing, Mr. Twist literally spit at the mention of Ennis' relationship with Jack.  In a similar vein, given that we see Ennis' father place a hand on or around his young shoulder to ensure that Ennis saw the horror that was Earl's defiled body -- I cannot help hoping that Jack's mother's hand on his shoulder in the Twist house was a healing parental touch for Ennis.

and that's my rant for tonight...!   

[serious crayons]

And a very well expressed rant it was, Alec! 

Especially this part:

Yes, and I think that the risks were very large, in light of Ennis' lifelong emotional and financial disempowerment.  He was willing to take time away from his wife and daughters, bargain with employers (which he was not willing to do to please Alma, as the grocery store scene shows), quit jobs, and (I believe most significantly of all) confront the violent and fearsome ghost of his hateful father in order to be with Jack to a larger extent than others in his shoes might have been willing or able to do.  He NEEDED Jack, and he knew it, and he never tried to deny it.  He was simply, tragically unable to act on the need as much as he wanted to.

I always feel bad when people criticize Ennis for not simply ignoring that violent and fearsome ghost -- the one permanently lodged in his mind -- and getting on with a sweet life. Of course I wish he would have. But what amazes me is not that he didn't cure himself of his homophobia for the sake of Jack, but that he was able to love Jack as well as he did despite his homophobia.

[Brown Eyes]

I am amazed that Ennis could function in a relationship at all with Jack.  He must have loved that man something powerful to set his fears aside, even to the limited extent that he did.  That's why I believe that "I swear"  ends with ... and I would be braver and be with you more if I had another chance.

Alec, I really like the way you put this.  It's really touching!

[alec716]

Alec, I really like the way you put this.  It's really touching!

I just calls it as I sees it... thanks.

[Ellemeno]

Hi Everyone, I just saw this thread for the first time just now (never enough time).  As I started readng the first few posts, I started formulating what I wanted to add, and then lo!, I found Katherine had done it for me by quoting something I wrote a while back. 

(I'm also glad to have the opportunity to see that I was, understandably - my writing wasn't clear, I see now - somewhat misunderstood.  I actually don't think that Ennis would kill Jack.)

As is so often the case when I come into a thread 26 posts in, I don't have much to add to the wonderful discussion, except to say that I've always found it very powerful that Jack never drops his direct gaze from Ennis's during the "Hell yeah I been a Mexico/All them things" exchange.  And he doesn't flinch at all when jabbed in the chest (and heart).  I think it says a lot about the strong, self-accepting, unashamed man that Jack has grown into.  I always feel proud of him for that moment.
The rest of what I feel like conveying right now seems to distill into saying once again, "Poor Ennis." 

[serious crayons]

The other day Ellemeno expressed what I thought was a really good concept: Ennis' internal homophobic lynch mob. Althoughin context I disagreed with her viewpoint (it was on the "would Ennis really kill Jack" thread -- I don't believe he would) this seemed so useful in regard to the question of Ennis' dad's influence that I went back and found it:

The only thing I can add to what's been said is that it always seems to me that part of what Ennis is doing there is making clear that even now, he is aligning himself with the homophobes and not with the homosexual.  It's what he got taught - when you find out that someone has had sex with a man, you kill them.  He could somehow torque it inside of himself that he himself ain't queer, so that doesn't count.  But if Jack has sex with another man, well that is queer, and thus a killable offense.

It's almost like he says it out loud pro forma, for any homophobes who might be listening, just like when on the mountain he leans back to watch Jack ride away, and then quickly catches himself and LOOKS AROUND, to see if anyone else has noticed that he was watching another guy.  He carries his homophobic lynch mob with him everywhere he goes, even way out in the middle of nowhere.

This is a first for me -- quoting myself quoting someone else!

Wow, that was a long time ago. Elle, I think maybe it is me who was unclear. Either that or I am unclear now about what I thought on April 29. For that matter, some of my posts on this very thread seem to contradict each other.

Anyway, you had a good concept -- Ennis' inner lynch mob -- which I thought of again more recently and may have even quoted, when speculating about why Ennis called it "the job," as if at some level he categorizes it as a normal chore as opposed to an atrocity.

[Brown Eyes]

I've always found it very powerful that Jack never drops his direct gaze from Ennis's during the "Hell yeah I been a Mexico/All them things" exchange.  And he doesn't flinch at all when jabbed in the chest (and heart).  I think it says a lot about the strong, self-accepting, unashamed man that Jack has grown into.  I always feel proud of him for that moment.

Hi Clarissa,
Thanks for joining in!  Wow, I've never really thought about Ennis's shove as a "jab in the heart".  That's really powerful.
 

I don't know if I can handle the "inner lynch mob" conversation again.
 

And, back to the original thread topic... I'm still obsessed with figuring out what the actual landscape is for the Earl flashback. 
 

[Ellemeno]

And, back to the original thread topic... I'm still obsessed with figuring out what the actual landscape is for the Earl flashback. 
 

I'm going to vote that that's why New Mexico is listed as a shooting location.  Sounds good to me.  But I don't really know.