From my experience (others may disagree), a BBM obsession is particularly confusing to people if you're straight. For gay men, I would think, the connection might seem obvious. For gay women, there are if nothing else political reasons for loving BBM. But for straight people -- what's up with that? Sure it's a good movie, but there are lots of good movies. What's the big deal about this particular one?? That's what I imagine non-Brokies thinking.
I think it makes some people even secretly question your sexual orientation. And while in principle I have no big objection to that, it can be awkward wondering if people misunderstand you in that way -- especially if it's your husband and kids!
I agree completely......
Yes......I remember......I remember someone saying to me one time..."Why would YOU like a gay movie?"....they probably were not thinking I was gay, but more so, could not understand why a straight woman would like it......
maybe they did think I might be gay....hunh.....oh well, who gives a flying f***)I do think though, if I were a straight man, going around raving about what a great movie it was, it would most probably be taken that I had gay tendancies, and for that reason, I think that there are a lot of straight men out there, who did enjoy the movie, but keep it to themselves, and some who might never have even dared go to a public theatre to watch it, for those same reasons. And.....I think, not that those straight men are necessarily homophobic but they just do not want to be quizzed about their sexuality, just because they like a particular movie.
Similarly, the responses I received, when I would mention the movie.....from straight women, it was, more or less a response about the movie in general, the actors, or the story, or if it was slow, or if the scenery was nice.
From straight men, the response, was nearly always about the gay theme, nothing else, just the gay theme. As if it was a taboo subject to talk about let alone put up there on the big screen. Some were quietly objectionable but a few were openly hostile. I actually got a surprise, to find that a couple of my friends who I had known for many years were downright blatantly homophobic.
I think, sometimes, I mentioned BBM and my admiration for the story, to not only say what a great movie it was, but to also make a statement that I am NOT homophobic, to be able to talk openly that the love story in the movie, was as normal as any other love story, that the story is not fictional, it is happening everywhere and as long as there are people who think of it as wrong, or abnormal, then there will be tragedies, and unhappiness. All it needs is understanding and acceptance......even if the person I was talking to, did not agree directly to me, at least it gave them something to go away and think about.
I think most of us Brokies think of BBM as a love story, beautifully written, and acted out by some brilliant actors...the gay theme is part of it, not ALL of it....
I guess we should not expect outsiders to understand us completely......gee, WE didn't understand ourselves at first, thought we were crazy, wondered what was going on....we have had the people here at Bettermost to help us understand......I guess its not understanding I was looking for, it was more a bit of respect for my beliefs, and some acknowledgement that the movie, did have a real story to tell and that it was told with dignity and passion.