Brokeback Mountain: Our Community's Common Bond > Heath Ledger Remembrance Forum

Poll: Your opinion on Jake's silence

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mvansand76:
You don't have to explain your choice, but you can if you want to.

Brown Eyes:
Heya Mel,

I voted for "I am disappointed in Jake and I feel that he should have said or written something about Heath's passing"... although I'd like to clarify that I'm not necessarily disappointed.  I'm more perplexed.  Sometimes I feel frustrated in this state of "not knowing."  But, I'm not disappointed in Jake really.  And, in the places where I've discussed this issue in JJJ and HHH and elsewhere, I don't want it to seem that I'm being negative about Jake or even really criticizing him.  I still think he's fantastic and an important part of Brokie-hood, etc.  But, the rest of the statement that I voted for here holds true for me.  I do think he should write or say something about Heath.  But, if he doesn't, I'm sure I'll be able to move on (and continue to like Jake as an actor/ personality, etc.).  Having a statement from Jake would help me tremendously in terms of coming to a sense of closure about the tragedy with Heath.  But, if we never get a statement from him, again, I'm sure I'll come to terms with that (without lingering "disappointment" directed towards Jake).  I think the frustration I feel about this from time to time is a passing thing.

louisev:
I posted elsewhere my opinion that the erupting controversy and lashback about Jake in our fandom is unjustified and unfair to Jake.  The main reason I feel this way is because I have been through the death of close family members and many friends, and have never issued any kind of condolence or statement about them, because I felt it was private and chose to keep those feelings to myself.  I also do not attend funerals, and did not attend my father's or my sister's funeral.  I suffered a lot of disrespect from people within my family for my choice, and yet I know that it did not reflect my personal feelings, which I chose to keep private.

I find it perfectly understandable that Jake, or anyone, chooses to keep such a deeply private expression to himself.  He owes no one any explanation for it, any more than I owed anyone an explanation as to why I chose to mourn in private, and we should not take it out on him.

nova20194:

I guess my statement would be a combination of the choices, more like......."I really don't feel that he owes us anything, BUT I am disappointed in Jake and I feel that he should have said or written something about Heath's passing".

j.U.d.E.:
I hesitated between:

'I really don't feel that he owes us anything and I understand why he hasn't said or written anything about Heath's passing'

and

'I think it's weird that he hasn't said or written anything about Heath's passing, but I understand that he doesn't owe us anything'

[I chose the first one]

I am not disappointed. I think it's a little weird though. It might make him feel better too maybe. But that's probably just my thinking.

He doesn't owe us anything. I just hope he knows how to deal with his grief and that he can find closure somehow, some day.

j. U. d. E.

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