Brokeback Mountain: Our Community's Common Bond > Brokeback Mountain Open Forum

Love Scene

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Katie77:

--- Quote from: tampatalon on September 08, 2008, 03:49:54 am ---Brokeback released me to live!

TampaTalon ^">

--- End quote ---

I guess those words say it all Tampa, and not only for people of the gay community, but I think it released a lot of us, from some kind of "closet".

optom3:

--- Quote from: Katie77 on September 08, 2008, 05:24:14 am ---I guess those words say it all Tampa, and not only for people of the gay community, but I think it released a lot of us, from some kind of "closet".



--- End quote ---

Could not agree more.For me as the tears flowed they acted like a release valve.All the things that had been festering away, buried so deep just rose to the surface and eploded out. I was no longer in a position to change anything, but at long last , at least I could acknowledge things.A much healthier state of mind was the result.

Artiste:
So females have different closets too ?

Is that one reason why females relate to Ennis and Jack??

May I ask ?


Au revoir,
hugs!

optom3:

--- Quote from: Artiste on September 09, 2008, 11:37:06 am ---So females have different closets too ?

Is that one reason why females relate to Ennis and Jack??

May I ask ?


Au revoir,
hugs!

--- End quote ---

Speaking for myself only, I can understand loving another woman and that not necessarily meaning I am gay.Humans have an infinite capacity for love, and it does not always need to be pigeon holed.
I think maybe men have a more difficult time separating love for a man with being gay.I am not really qualified to speak on that part though.I think that Ennis found the love of his life and that just happened to be another man, Jack.  He is not able to process or accept this and so begins the start of his slide into despair.I have never been 100% sold on the idea that Ennis is gay.He is certainly in love and physically very attracted to Jack, but I am not sure how far that makes him gay.
Jack is different, he loves Ennis, physically and emotionally, but he also has sex with other men.I think in his case he is almost certainly gay. As with everything to do with the film and s.s it is ambiguous and open to a whole host of interpretations.

So I think women can empathise on many levels, emotionally and physically.The added element is that for me the sex is also a turn on, as are the tender scenes.I would suspect for a straight man this might not be the case.But again because of societies unwritten rules that straight men have to follow, I don't suppose they would ever dare to admit if they found any aspect of the film a turn on, or even just tender and human.

It seems to me that it is still more acceptable for a woman to be physical with another woman, even if that is only a big long hug, in times of distress.We think nothing of it.Straight men are trapped by societies dictates..Even if their world is falling apart, they could on the whole, never sit and be hugged by even their best male friend.

It is something that has always saddened me, consequently I have taught both my boys to be very affectionate by showing them masses of physical affection.I also encouraged my husband to do the same.It is sad all the same when I see my boys being rebuffed if they try to hug a good friend who is leaving to go home.
Why is it acceptable for women, and not men. I fear my boys will end up the same as all the generations before them.Not because they feel like that, but because  others are embarrassed by the gesture. So back to square one.

Do men not hurt as well ? of course they do.So do they not then in times of distress need the human warmth from a good friend?Well of course is the answer to that one as well. So why does society find it unacceptable for men but not women.

I am on a roll now.I have recently had to tell my 11 year old son not to mention at school that when he is upset he still gets into bed with me.That is just plain wrong.He still needs his mum to hug him when he has a nightmare or a bad day.Yet I know full well that if other boys at school found out, there would be all sorts of implications and inferences.

It is of course O.K for my daughter to get into bed with me, but then her father has to get out, for the same reasons.The problem is that a few sick people, have taken away the joy of a parent to be able to provide comfort and physical affection ie hugs, to their kids when they are upset at night.When I told my oldest not to mention at school, I even began to feel like a criminal, for hugging my son. This world is a very mixed up place.Too much hate and not enough love and affection.

I believe that one of the main reasons some men have enormous difficulties in expressing any emotion is a fear of how society will judge them. I am not instantly branded gay, if I cuddle with my best friend.But if my husband were to do that,I can just imagine the reaction.I do feel that some of the mediterranean countries are several steps ahead of Britain and America. We could do worse than to copy them.I know when we left England my husband was terribly upset to say goodbye to his close friend, as was I.The difference, I hugged my friend as if my life depended on it. My husband and friend had a bit of that back clapping sort of thing, very sad.

O.K I am off my soap box now.

Artiste:
Merci optom!

WELL said... are your messages in your post!!
...

May I add:

Men certainly view some sex scenes differently that women do... it seems, in the Brokekack Movie movie!

My straight brother advanced the first sex scene, and did so rapidly seeing what was starting to happen! Did any females do that, may I ask?


Au revoir,
hugs!

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