Brokeback Mountain: Our Community's Common Bond > Brokeback Mountain Open Forum

Why are we like this?

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Marge_Innavera:

--- Quote from: atz75 on March 20, 2009, 09:34:09 pm ---After over three years of the Brokie experience, it seems worthwhile to reconsider this now age-old question.
:)

So, I'll take a serious stab at the question.  The more I think about it, the more I think BBM touched those of us who are hardcore Brokies in some way that resonates or resonated with some serious issue that we needed to or still need to resolve in our own lives.  I don't think it is always an absolutely direct relationship to the literal themes or storylines with in the movie/story.  It seems to me that many serious Brokies have been or still are looking for some kind of major change or adjustment in their own lives.  The way BBM spoke to or continues to speak to that need for change or reevaluation is certainly completely unique for everyone who has experienced this.

--- End quote ---

Sorry if this sounds so academic, but I think there are archetypes in both the ss and movie that impact people on a level well below a superficial viewing of a movie you like. There were so many of us that identified with the story and characters but would seem to have so little in common with them in terms of gender, sexual orientation, geography social class or anything else.

It's been difficult for me to get people in my life to understand about it -- most of them don't even know.

serious crayons:

--- Quote from: Marge_Innavera on March 21, 2009, 12:50:38 pm ---Sorry if this sounds so academic, but I think there are archetypes in both the ss and movie that impact people on a level well below a superficial viewing of a movie you like. There were so many of us that identified with the story and characters but would seem to have so little in common with them in terms of gender, sexual orientation, geography social class or anything else.

It's been difficult for me to get people in my life to understand about it -- most of them don't even know.

--- End quote ---

But still, it's mysterious. Most of the people in my life don't understand it, either. Many, of course, haven't bothered to see the movie. But even among those who do, ours is clearly not a universal reaction.

I think you're right, Marge, about the archetypes and the deep impact. I think it's fairly easy to understand why this movie is more powerful than most good movies. But it's harder to explain why this movie doesn't hold that same power on everybody who sees it (even if they're not homophobic).

Front-Ranger:
I agree about the archetype. The one that most closely resembles Brokeback Mountain to me is that of the young person at the threshhold of adulthood on whom a spell is cast so they fall into a deep trance or sleep but are awakened by the transforming power of love.

We all feel that there's a possibility we might be "rescued" from our humdrum existance by love or that we might experience again the rush of exuberance that we did in youth.

optom3:
For me the connection was and still is, that of a wrong turning made in my life. It is also the dreadful realisation that life has moved on way too far now, to ever turn round again.

It is  about deluding myself that once having found love, albeit at a less than opportune time, that love could ever just cease.

Do we cease to love someone who has died, I think not.Yet in my befuddled brain, I thought I could just up and walk away.

Another connection is that of a parent, now desperate for her children not to repeat the mistakes she has made.

The brother of my love and I do mean my love, once implored, don't do this. He had lost his partner and great love to AIDS. He berated me saying, how can you walk away from this, when I would give anything to have my lover back. He was nonplussed by my stupidity. He was also unfortunately, quite right.

So I watch BBM and grieve on many levels, particularly when I see that my actions, although guided by a desire to do the right thing, have in actual fact, left casualties on route.

It is of paramount importance to me that my children find love and hang on to it. At least then I will feel some happy resolution has come from my sacrifice. To think that I may have given up so much and for no good to ensue, would be beyond bearable.

BBM continues to resonate with me on so many levels that it is now an integral part of me. I can talk to no one about it, (apart from here at Bettermost) as to do so would hurt too many people.So I nurse my personal grief and hope for the, it is better to have loved and lost, to actually resonate truthfully with me. So far that has proved to be  elusive, as has any sustained  peace of mind.

So I find myself much as Ennis, hanging on to dreams to warm me through the day.

twistedude:
I saw Brokeback on December 26, 2005.  And then 29 more times in the theater. And I have the mother of all DVDs.

..which I haven't watched for a year. Fiction? That was then; this is now.

Like other people who have posted on this thread--my reasons (which I've thought and thought, and THOUGHT about)--are a little different from everyone else's. Read them! They are NOT all the same!

I fell in love with the RELATIONSHIP between the two men. SO: Had I ever done this before? Sorta. As young girl, if I had a crush on a boy, and he had a girl friend--I would fall in love with the relationship between the two of them. Not wildly, but mildly. Why? I don't know.

I was shy, and noisy (a terrible combination), and usually had only 1, or sometimes 2 good friends.  I've had two great loves in my life (it's so nice to have had two, instead of just one! So I know it's possible...). I married for like, not for love. "Not for me flows that spring"? Why? I don't know.

When I was watching the previews of Brokeback, when Jack says "I wish I could quit you," I had never heard anyone use that tone of voice before. It pierced my heart. Why? I don't know.

There are probably millions (through time) of gay people out there, fictional and real, who 'wish they could quit" someone.  I wish they'd get on the same elevator with the person they love,  and stay there, and not quit. Why is this so important to me? I don't know.

Helpful, wasn't I?

My first boyfriend, at 18 (photo taken by me, when i was 15...in 1950).

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