The World Beyond BetterMost > The Culture Tent
In the New Yorker...
serious crayons:
I also have to say that I was in awe of the intrepidity of her travels. India alone at 22? I wouldn't go to India alone now.
Jeff Wrangler:
--- Quote from: serious crayons on November 23, 2013, 04:01:14 pm ---Now that is a spoiler. I was going to mention something about that -- about how I felt more invested in her marriage than I usually am, because of that other essay -- and decided not to say anything to avoid spoilers. But now that you've let the cat out of the bag ...
--- End quote ---
Well, yeah, but I figured the only people who read and post on this thread are going to read the article anyway, so. ...
--- Quote ---I thought it was interesting that she never indicated the gender of her spouse. If you examine the writing, you can see she was careful to avoid using pronouns.
--- End quote ---
I noticed that immediately, and I thought it was interesting, too. She also didn't go into the how of how she conceived the child.
--- Quote ---I now know much more than I ever had about what it's like in Mongolia in November.
--- End quote ---
I'd say more than I cared or needed to know about November in Mongolia. :-\
--- Quote ---But if I hadn't read that other essay I wouldn't know she was married to a woman. (Though of course it's possible that this is actually a different marriage.) Any theories on why she kept that undisclosed?
--- End quote ---
Good point--I'm assuming it's the gay marriage--and assuming if she had a heterosexual marriage she would have written "my husband" instead of "my spouse" or "my partner." But I suppose she could have had more than one gay/lesbian marriage, too.
Perhaps she kept that undisclosed because it might have been a distraction to readers who didn't already know she's lesbian? Plus, in a way I think the gender of her spouse is kind of irrelevant to the story she's telling. I understand that the loss of a pregnancy sometimes leads to the breakup of heterosexual couples, too.
I am very, very sad for her, and also very relieved for her. She may have come closer to dying than she even realizes. Here we go with my spoilers agaiin ;D but my jaw dropped when I read that she pulled out the placenta. If it had adhered to her uterus, she could have torn her uterus and bled to death in that Mongolian hotel room. As it was she probably came close. :(
--- Quote from: serious crayons on November 23, 2013, 04:02:54 pm ---I also have to say that I was in awe of the intrepidity of her travels. India alone at 22? I wouldn't go to India alone now.
--- End quote ---
Yeah, me, too.
Front-Ranger:
--- Quote from: serious crayons on November 23, 2013, 04:02:54 pm ---I also have to say that I was in awe of the intrepidity of her travels. India alone at 22? I wouldn't go to India alone now.
--- End quote ---
If you're thinking about it from the standpoint of safety, India is a far safer country than the US. Every third person is not toting a concealed gun and Indians are such pacifist that they wouldn't harm a cow or even an ant. India is a very popular destination for college graduates who want to see a completely different culture.
If you're thinking that it's a long way away and an arduous plane trip, then it's better to go when you're young than when you're older and not as limber or flexible.
Depends on how you're approaching the idea.
Front-Ranger:
--- Quote from: Jeff Wrangler on November 23, 2013, 05:37:15 pm ---Well, yeah, but I figured the only people who read and post on this thread are going to read the article anyway, so. ...
--- End quote ---
When I first read your comment about the article, there were 2 members reading it and 5 guests.
Penthesilea:
--- Quote from: serious crayons on November 23, 2013, 04:01:14 pm ---I thought it was interesting that she never indicated the gender of her spouse. If you examine the writing, you can see she was careful to avoid using pronouns. I now know much more than I ever had about what it's like in Mongolia in November, but if I hadn't read that other essay I wouldn't know she was married to a woman. (Though of course it's possible that this is actually a different marriage.) Any theories on why she kept that undisclosed?
--- End quote ---
--- Quote from: Jeff Wrangler on November 23, 2013, 05:37:15 pm ---I noticed that immediately, and I thought it was interesting, too. She also didn't go into the how of how she conceived the child.
--- End quote ---
I can confirm what you two said here. I read the article earlier today, but had never heard her name before that and thus didn't know anything about her. To be honest, I didn't notice she avoided pronouns and kept the language gender-neutral. Except once when I tipped over the expression "spouse" and found it somewhat - I don't know - strange might be a too strong word, but I noticed this one. Didn't give it a second thought though and only here on BM I learned she's lesbian.
--- Quote ---Perhaps she kept that undisclosed because it might have been a distraction to readers who didn't already know she's lesbian? Plus, in a way I think the gender of her spouse is kind of irrelevant to the story she's telling.
--- End quote ---
It is.
--- Quote ---I understand that the loss of a pregnancy sometimes leads to the breakup of heterosexual couples, too.
--- End quote ---
Now here's the thing I really found strange. Her marriage was over within three weeks after the incident? I can picture this put a strain on their relationship, and I know many marriages don't survive the death of a child. But that's long term. At first I would imagine a couple clinging together all the closer in such a tragedy. Holding on even tighter to the other in times of overwhelming grief.
Maybe she didn't want to get into more details about her marriage because it's not the point of the story. Similar to what Jeff said about her non-use of pronouns. But still, this tidbit of fact remains strange.
--- Quote ---I am very, very sad for her, and also very relieved for her. She may have come closer to dying than she even realizes. Here we go with my spoilers agaiin ;D but my jaw dropped when I read that she pulled out the placenta. If it had adhered to her uterus, she could have torn her uterus and bled to death in that Mongolian hotel room. As it was she probably came close. :(
--- End quote ---
Yeah, I had similar thoughts when reading the piece. :-\
I think nightmare doesn't even describe what she had to go thru. And she had to go through all of it alone. :(
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