Brokeback Mountain: Our Community's Common Bond > Brokeback Mountain Open Forum
Would Ennis Commit Suicide?
dly64:
--- Quote from: Rayn on September 02, 2006, 06:45:44 am ---I'd like to think he could've gotten a handle on them and survived, but then I'm an optimist most often and we all tend to look at/see things through the filters of our own experiences. I hope if there are others out there reading this thread, this letter, they will be encouraged and if they are thinking of hurting themselves, they will seek and find help and healing. Knowing how it feels, that is my sincere hope because there are always other people who care and who will listen and though it may not feel so at times, no one is ever completely alone. We all share an invisible connection with each other.
Peace,
Rayn
--- End quote ---
Beautifully stated, Rayn! I have been very close myself ... not because of my sexuality (I am hetero), but because everything seemed to come crashing down around me. But help ... it's there. I love what you said here ... "We all share an invisible connection with each other." Thanks for being such an optimist! ;)
Rayn:
Well friends, thanks for your feedback on my hopes for a brighter future for anyone coping with grief or depression. It's an important issue, which many of us, men and women in and outside our community experience.
I know the statistics for suicide are higher for the GayLesbianBiTransexual Community, so my deeper concern is for people there, but anyone who becomes depressed or goes through grief due to the death of loved one or family member is vulnerable to self-destructive impluses.
The remedy is early recognition in ourselves and others then dealing with it through treatment. It's like any other disease, early detection makes it easier to treat, heal and get on with a happy life.
Peace,
Rayn
Katie77:
I am no expert on suicide, but have encountered it in my family.....my father committed suicide, a few years after his gay partnership ended.......
My dad had lost his 22 year old daughter about 10 years before that....which to me would have been more traumatic than the break up of his partnership....but maybe its not just one single thing, its when, as they say, "the glass is full", that they just dont want to take anymore hurt and unhappiness in their life.
My son, when aged 23 also attempted suicide, when his marriage broke up, and his wife took their baby son, and refused him access to him. After many years enduring the slow court system he now sees his son regularly.
Reports here in Australia, show statistics, that it is young men who are more likely to commit suicide...and fathers in custody battles for their children are among those increasing numbers.....another case, when sometimes it just gets too hard and too painful to keep going, that they think ending their life, will give them some peace....
I heard the best quote the other day, which sums up suicide.....
Suicide is a permanent solution for a temporary problem....and I tend to agree with that....
Momof2:
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Suicide is a permanent solution for a temporary problem....and I tend to agree with that....
I agree with this statement. I had a really hard childhood and have had many hard times as an adult. I have never thought of suicide. It is the people that are left behind that suffer. They are the ones that have to deal with it. My husbands girlfriend killed herself a few months after they broke up. That was 20 years ago and he still blames himself for it. I have a really close family member whose boyfriend blew his head off in front of her. It is unbearable thing to deal with. I have already stated that I do not think Ennis would have committed suicide. He loved his children to much.
moremojo:
I have come to see suicide as simply one doorway into death--it's no more, or less, moral than dying from a heart attack, succumbing to cancer, being killed in an accident or disaster, or any other way that people can and do pass out of this earthly existence (and which we all must, and will, do in our turn, someday). What I'm trying to suggest here is that there need be no guilt felt by those left behind by a suicide, and it is certainly not for me to judge someone who chooses that route. All I can guess at is that, at the moment it happened, a suicide seemed like the best option for the person who committed it, and I will only bless them and wish them peace. It is also instructive to reflect on the myriad ways that we, both individually and as a civilization, are arguably committing suicide, though our behavior may not widely be openly acknowledged as suicidal.
Proulx's last line is the fulcrum by which this issue, to my mind, revolves..."if you can't fix it, you gotta stand it." Suicide is a form of fixing, the kind that transpires when someone can't stand it anymore. If Ennis ever got to that point, suicide may have occurred. But the story both opens and ends with him, grief-stricken though he is, standing it. All else can only remain speculation, and is another way in which the author forces us to finish the story in our own lives, in our own hearts.
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