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TOTW 04/09: Ennis, Jack, and Fatherhood

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LauraGigs:


Ennis, Jack, and Fatherhood

Even for those of us who aren't fathers or whose fathers are gone, Dad's day in the U.S. brings the fatherhood to the forefront. So what kind of fathers were Ennis and Jack? 

Did having children help them in any way?  Did their central dilemmas as unfulfilled gay men affect how they were as fathers? 

What of their fathers?  How were Ennis and Jack affected by their actions, examples and flaws?  Were they really that bad — or just doing the best they knew?

Share all your thoughts and ideas.
 :)

Sophia:


 Very interesting subject and questions. Thank you very much. The first thing that comes to my mind when I am thinking of Ennis, Jack and fatherhood is honesty. How were they able to communicate with there children, would they be honest and straight forward towards the kids?

Mandy21:
The scene which, to me, represents true fatherhood, is the final scene when Ennis's daughter comes to the trailer to announce her upcoming wedding.  At first, Ennis falls back on all the old excuses as to why he can't be there for his daughter when she needs him, but then it seems like a light bulb goes off in his head and heart and he does a 180 and says that he would gladly lose his current job if it means his attendance at his little girl's wedding would make her happiest day complete.

I always felt that it took Ennis losing the greatest miracle of his life in order for him to begin to appreciate all of the others he had been given.  The blinders finally began to come off.

Monika:
It's pretty clear that movie Ennis and Jack were portrayed as being better fathers than their SS equivalents.
Perhaps they didn't want to distract us from the main theme of the movie, perhaps they feared that portraying gay men as bad fathers would alienate certain groups. I can think of a number of different reasons.
I think Annie Proulx on tried to stay true to her characters as possible and didn't want to make them more symphatetic simply because they happened to be gay. I certainly admire her for that, but I also feel comfortable with what they did with movie Ennis and Jack.



On a personal note, Ennis has always reminded me of my own father. My father can also come across as harsh and is very stubborn and proud. He has work with his hands all his life, and it shows. He isn't big on showing affections either. But I know he loves me, because he is always there when I really need his help. And I think this is how Junior knows Ennis loves her, in spite of him perhaps never saying the actual words.

Brown Eyes:
Thanks for this great topic Laura. :)

Monika, I agree that they're portrayed as being better fathers in the movie than in the story.  A person who only saw the movie wouldn't necessarily know that Jack really didn't want children at all.  And, it's not entirely clear in the film how long Ennis goes without seeing his children (as indicated in the story) when they're older. 

It's interesting that in the movie there's an emphasis on the push and pull of tension and struggle between each set of parents (Ennis and Alma; Jack and Lureen) when it comes to parental responsibilities.  We see Ennis really trying to help in the lonesome ranch house with the tiny girls and their runny noses (and we see how tense housekeeping/ child rearing makes Alma in that scene).  And, then we see the confrontation between Ennis and Alma over juggling work and childcare in the grocery scene.  There's something kind of patriarchal about Ennis's assumption that Alma can drop everything to take care of the kids (even in the middle of her work day)... but, then on the other hand it's also pure necessity since there's no one else to take care of the kids when he's called off to work (it's a no win/ no choice situation for either parent).  And, likewise with Jack and Lureen we see the tension between the two of them over dealing with Bobby's tutoring and teachers.  All of this tension and the imperfect relationships/ solutions to certain problems within this topic seem to add to the sense of realism in the film I think.

It's interesting too, that Jack's father is not made to seem as monstrous in the film as he is in the book.  I think the omission of the scene of abuse against Jack when he was a child is one of the most striking differences between the film and the book.  Jack's father comes across as a jerk in the film, but someone who has not read the story wouldn't understand the extent of his abuse.  Whereas, Ennis's father seems pretty much just as bad in the film as in the book.

Since abuse is often a cyclical problem that manifests itself over many generations, I think it's a remarkable and great thing that... by all indications... neither Jack nor Ennis are portrayed as being at all abusive towards their children (given the fact that they were both abused children themselves... in different ways, but still abused).

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