The World Beyond BetterMost > Anything Goes
NC-17 RATED FUN: LET'S GET REAL HERE--How Many of Us Have Been SWOONING Nonstop?
ednbarby:
Good points, Leslie and RT. As much as I kid about it here, no way could I share my husband with another person, (outrageously hot) man or woman. To me, true intimacy means that we share our sexual selves only with each other. If open marriages work for some folks, power to them - I judge no one for anything sexually they do as consenting adults. But I honestly don't believe it works 100% perfectly for most couples - I gotta believe at least one of them can't help but feel jealous. It's just human nature.
I think a major aspect of the pain for Alma - perhaps the only one - is that when she sees Ennis and Jack together, she sees Ennis having the passion for him she so craves from him but has never had. And it must dawn on her, too, that all those times together it was him he was thinking of.
I have no problem with my husband fantasizing about me being someone he doesn't know. Nor he me. That's one of our jokes - we don't care who pumps the tires as long as we get to ride. But realizing it's been someone he knows and obviously has known intimately all those years? That would be beyond devastating.
Even so, I never questioned her staying with him for as long as she did. In her place and time, sad to say, it makes sense. And actually, I've known several women who've known about affairs their husbands were having for years and turned a blind eye because the cold comfort they had was better than the alternative in their minds.
ednbarby:
--- Quote from: dmmb_Mandy on April 06, 2006, 07:00:53 pm ---Barb - we're on, beeotch! *takes out rope* ;)
--- End quote ---
This ain't no rodeo, cowboy! (And if I were you, I'd watch out for that right hook sucker punch. Gets 'em every time.) :P
starboardlight:
--- Quote from: lnicoll on April 06, 2006, 05:11:00 pm ---For me, it is an issue of love. I don't think there was a real strong foundation of love in their marriage and to be able to be open, understanding, and ultimately accepting really requires a pretty deep commitment and a high degree of maturity, something I didn't see in either of them while they were married.
--- End quote ---
I completely agree here. I don't think their marriage would have last even if Jack never came into Ennis's life. Like you said, the foundation was never there. Ennis was to repressed to be open to her emotionally, and Alma just didn't have what it took to coax him out of his emotional shell.
dmmb_Mandy:
Barb - I agree, I would never be able to have an open marriage. BTW, watch out, I know (some) tae kwon do!
MaineWriter:
--- Quote from: starboardlight on April 06, 2006, 07:22:03 pm ---
--- Quote from: lnicoll on April 06, 2006, 05:11:00 pm ---For me, it is an issue of love. I don't think there was a real strong foundation of love in their marriage and to be able to be open, understanding, and ultimately accepting really requires a pretty deep commitment and a high degree of maturity, something I didn't see in either of them while they were married.
--- End quote ---
I completely agree here. I don't think their marriage would have last even if Jack never came into Ennis's life. Like you said, the foundation was never there. Ennis was to repressed to be open to her emotionally, and Alma just didn't have what it took to coax him out of his emotional shell.
--- End quote ---
I agree...even without Jack, that marriage was doomed. They had money to fight about, Ennis had nothing but dead end jobs--the fact that Jack was "out there" and Ennis was gay was almost secondary to the other issues they were dealing with in their mostly crummy marriage.
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