wish I could apologize to everyone I ever argued with
You can! Apology accepted, Jeff!
Kidding. I know what you both mean, Jeff and Amanda. My emotional response has become a little less raw and intense, and at the same time it's a little less blissfully romantic than it used to be. I'm more pragmatic, a bit more willing to entertain the possibility of the slightly bleaker perspectives that Jeff used to promote (
) in our arguments. The two phenomena might not be related.
I haven't watched the movie for a few months, and I'm not sure at this point whether watching it would be a good idea or not. I'd like to hold on to whatever intensity of emotion I can sustain, and I can't tell whether absence makes the heart grow fonder or familiarity breeds ... well, not contempt of course, but let's say desensitization.
I get sad whenever I see somebody say this -- for example, Mikaela's post earlier made me a bit melancholy. But it's sort of an inevitable part of the process. I'll never move on from BBM and think, "Oh, OK, been there done that, now I'm going to be obsessed with (fill in the name of some other movie) instead." No. Never. Not to sound too ridiculous, but it's more like a religion. After a while, my love for BBM has become a central part of my worldview -- a part of my soul, really -- so that even though it's still always there and always affecting the way I see things, it's not constantly on the surface of my consciousness. Does that make sense?