The World Beyond BetterMost > Anything Goes
Kerry's Komedy Klub
Katie77:
Strailya Mate!
An Australian, a Kiwi and South African are in a bar one night having a beer.
All of a sudden the South African drinks his beer, throws his glass in the air, pulls out a gun and shoots the glass to pieces.
In Seth Efrika our glasses are so cheap that we don't need to drink from the same one twice,' he says.
The Kiwi, obviously impressed by this, drinks his beer, throws his glass into the air, pulls out his gun and shoots the glass to pieces.
'Wull mate, in Noo Zulland we have so much sand to make the glasses that we don't need to drink out of the same glass either,' he says.
The Australian, cool as a Koala, picks up his beer and drinks it, throws his glass in the air, pulls out his gun and shoots the South African and the Kiwi.
He turns to the astonished barman and says, 'In Strailya mate, we have so many bloody South Africans and Kiwis that we don't need to drink with the same ones twice.
Katie77:
Two good ol' > boys in a Tennessee
Two good ol'
> boys in a Tennessee
> trailer
> park
> were sitting around talking one afternoon over a cold beer
> after getting off of work at their local Nissan plant.
>
>
>
> After a while
> the 1st guy says to the 2nd, "If'n I was to sneak
> over to your trailer Saturday and make love to your
> wife while you was off huntin' and she got pregnant and
> had a baby, would that make us kin?"
>
>
>
> The 2nd guy
> crooked his head sideways for a minute, scratched his head
> and squinted his eyes thinking real hard about the question.
> Finally, he says, "Well, I don't know about
> kin, but it would make us even."
>
>
Kerry:
The Reverend Fred Nile is a Jerry Falwell clone here in Sydney. He's doubly dangerous because as well as being a minister of religion, he is also a politician! To give you an insight into his mean-spirited, decidedly un-Christian character, each year he attends the Gay Mardi Gras parade with a small band of like-minded fanatics . . . . no, not to dance and party, but to pray for rain! ::)
Kerry:
Wilson Tuckey is one of the most eccentric and controversial figures in Australian federal politics. In 1967, when he owned a pub in Carnarvon, Western Australia, he was convicted of assault after striking an Aboriginal man with a length of steel cable. It was alleged that the man was being pinned to the ground at the time. He has had the nickname "Ironbar Tuckey" ever since.
Kerry:
This little test will enable you to find out who REALLY is your role model.
Don’t scroll down just yet though . . . . .
First, you need to do the simple maths below and then scroll down to find your hero:
You will think it’s crazy how accurate this is!
1. Pick your favourite number between 1–9
2. Multiply by 3, then . . .
3. Add 3
4. Then again multiply by 3 (I’ll wait while you grab the calculator)
5. You’ll get a 2 or 3 digit number
6. Add the digits together
NOW SCROLL DOWN
KEEP SCROLLING
WON'T BE LONG NOW
YOU'RE ALMOST THERE
With that number, see who your ROLE MODEL is from the list below:
1. Einstein
2. Oprah Winfrey
3. Snoopy
4. Ronald Reagan
5. Bill Gates
6. Mahatma Gandhi
7. Brad Pitt
8. Babe Ruth
9. KERRY! That's right, it's ME!
10. John F. Kennedy
I know – I can't help being charismatic – one day you too can be like me. Believe it!
P.S., Stop picking different numbers!!! I AM YOUR IDOL, JUST DEAL WITH IT! ;) :laugh:
Navigation
[0] Message Index
[#] Next page
[*] Previous page
Go to full version