BetterMost, Wyoming & Brokeback Mountain Forum
Our BetterMost Community => The Polling Place => Topic started by: CellarDweller on May 15, 2010, 08:28:53 pm
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This is only meant for fun!
The cable channel VH-1 recently ran a week long special called "Undateable". Things that some men do that make them "undateable" to women.
Whether it be fashion mistakes, hygene, habits, or other things, this is a list of 100 things that women have listed as things that men do to make them undateable.
Women, do you agree with the items here? Men, which ones are you guilty of?
:D :D :D
Since we have an international membership here, under some of the tems I've listed a definition of what the offending item/behavior is.
100. Man Shakes
(elaborate hand shakes)
99. Blue Tooth
98. Wrong Sheets
(cartoon characters and such)
97. Mandanas
(bandana on the head)
96. Tanks & Sleeveless Ts
95. Arm Wrestling In Public
94. “The Blank –STER”
(Hi, I'm the Chuck-ster!)
93. Vanity Plates
("cutsey license plates)
92. Quoting Lines From Movies
91. Unfortunate Ties
(Cartoon characters, holday theme)
90. Cell Phone On The Waist
89. Sports Cliches
88. The Flatulence Trifecta
(Farting, naming them, giving a "Dutch Oven")
87. Ordering Wine @ Stadium
86. Online TMI
(oversharing on Facebook and Twitter)
85. Pleated Pants
84. Embellished Jeans
(Jeans with patches, images, flames)
83. Rearranging Junk / Butt Picking
82. Sports Jerseys
81. Dirty Car
80. Aggressive Sport Fans
79. Murses
(bags instead of wallets)
78. Whining
77. Jorts & Japris
(shorts and capris made of denim)
76. Air Guitar
75. Boners
74. Fake Swearing
73. Hawaiian Shirts
72. Overly Creative Voice Mail
(over long, musical, or comedic messages)
71. Names For Breasts
("the girls", "fun bags", "the Wodner Twins")
70. Listening To Lite FM
69. Skullwear
(shoes, shirts, jewelry with skulls on them)
68. Speaking In Cartoon Voice
67. Can’t Throw Ball
66. Pet Names for Penis
(Herculeas, joystick)
65. Crocs
64. Pitted Out Shirts
(old shirts that have sweat stains in the arm pit area)
63. Booya
(Whoa! Touchdown! Booya!)
62. Tap That / Hit That
(slang for sex. That chick is hot, I'm gonna tap that!)
61. Playing Dungeons & Dragons
60. Going Shirtless In Public
59. Owning Nunchucks
58. Bling
(wearing too much jewelry at one time)
57. Stupid Tees
(t-shirts with "clever" slogans on them)
56. Bad Dancing
55. Busting Out Porn Too Soon
54. Biker Shorts
53. Talking About Video Games
52. Bro-Code
51. “Moist”
50. Leather Pants
49. Crotch Grab
48. Holiday Sweaters
47. Bad Table Manners
46. Cut Off Shorts
45. Penis Enlargement
(owning gadgets and pills to enlarge the penis)
44. Frequenting Gun Range
43. Tacky Texting
42. Chain Wallet
41. Getting Drunk On a Plane
40. Disturbing Laugh
39. Lame Pick-up Lines
(If I could rearrange the alphabet, I'd put "U" and "I" together)
38. Open-Mouth Breathing
37. Excessive Ed Hardy
36. Burping Loudly & Proudly
35. Owning A Van
34. Baby Talk
33. Dad Jeans
32. Hairy Back, Neck & Nose
31. Eminem-Speak
30. Wimpy Drinker
(drinking fruit flavored drinks instead of beer or hard liquor)
29. Double Demin
(Jean pants and shirt at the same time)
28. Bicep & Calf Implants
27. The Pregnant Man
26. Speedos
25. Bad Driver (Sissy/Rage)
(either a fearful driver, or angry driver)
24. Attending Geek Conventions
(Star Trek conventions or such)
23. Talking in Third Person
(Ex - if I were talking: Are we getting red velvet cake? Chuck likes red velvet cake. Chuck likes it a lot)
22. Riding A Contraption
(Unicycle, seque, recumbent bicycle)
21. Moobs
(untrim chest/overweight, so the man looks like he has "man boobs")
20. Guy lights/ Dyeing Your Hair
(guys with highlights in their hair)
19. Bringing Glove to A Game
(going to a baseball game, and bringing a glove to catch fly balls)
18. Tighty Whities
(plain white underwear)
17. Bad Facial Hair
(untrimmed, bizarre styles)
16. Gross Nails
15. Not Paying On First Date
14. Dirty Hair
13. Fur Coats
12. Bald Denial
(comb overs, pony tails, toupees, hair plugs)
11. Steroids
10. Creepily Into Mom
9. Excessive Waxing
8. Hocking Loogies
(spitting in public)
7. Mandals with Socks
(men wearing sandals and socks)
6. The V & Other Gestures
(Making a peace sign, or devil sign with your hands/fingers)
5. Bustin’ a Sag
(Wearing pants that hang way too low, so your underwear is showing)
4. Eye/ Face lift
3. Chewing Tobacco
2. Talking About your Ex
1. The C-Word
(C*nt)
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Ok, so these are the one's I'm guilty of.
100. Man Shakes
96. Tanks & Sleeveless Ts
94. “The Blank –STER”
(Hi, I'm the Chuck-ster!)
92. Quoting Lines From Movies
85. Pleated Pants
79. Murses
(I don't have a murse, but I do occasionally use a "Mariconera")
77. Jorts & Japris
(shorts only!)
70. Listening To Lite FM
32. Hairy Back, Neck & Nose
30. Wimpy Drinker
(drinking fruit flavored drinks instead of beer or hard liquor)
24. Attending Geek Conventions
(Do Brokie gatherings count? If so, guilty!!!)
21. Moobs
(Hopefully once the diet goal is reached, the moobs will be gone!)
6. The V & Other Gestures
(Learned my lesson when I did it in New Zealand!)
1. The C-Word
Oh yeah, I've said it!
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Wow! These women are picky! :laugh:
;)
Somebody gave me a Dutch Oven once and I nearly got SICK! He let a big fart and then pinned me under the covers so I had to smell it. I was REALLY mad at him for awhile. :P :P
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I'm happy to say that I've never been the victim of a dutch oven.
;D
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80. Aggressive Sport Fans
64. Pitted Out Shirts
(old shirts that have sweat stains in the arm pit area)
47. Bad Table Manners
41. Getting Drunk On a Plane
25. Bad Driver (Sissy/Rage)
(either a fearful driver, or angry driver)
1. The C-Word
These are the things that would bother me. A lot of the other items I find endearing. Like, for instance, double denim...just like Jack!!
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I'm happy to say that I've never been the victim of a dutch oven.
;D
I'm happy to say that until I read David's post, I'd didn't even know what a "Dutch oven" is.
Nor did I know that it's possible to get bicep implants.
Where do I sign up? ... ;D
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Women (allegedly) don't like their men in plain white underwear? ???
What do they want? None at all? Boxers with Tweetie Bird on them? ???
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I like anything or nothing so long as if it's anything, it's clean.
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Women (allegedly) don't like their men in plain white underwear? ???
What do they want? None at all? Boxers with Tweetie Bird on them? ???
It's not plain white underwear, but "Tighty whities" they don't like.
(http://www.rednecklatte.com/wp-content/uploads/2009/11/TIGHTY-WHITIES.jpg)
Boxers are fine.
(http://stupidfathobbit.org/blog1/wp-content/uploads/2009/03/matureboxers.jpg)
Or "boxer-briefs".
(http://www.besportier.com/archives/gordini-boxer-briefs.jpg)
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lol i didnt read the list but im def undateable
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Tighty whities are definitely NOT the thing to wear when a man is lookin' to get laid by a woman over the age of 18. I broke up with a guy who had me in a penthouse suite in Memphis, when I woke up and saw him wearing those. He was in his 50's.
SOOOOOOOOO wrong.
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21. Moobs
(untrim chest/overweight, so the man looks like he has "man boobs")
25. Bad Driver (Sissy/Rage)
(either a fearful driver, or angry driver)
30. Wimpy Drinker
(drinking fruit flavored drinks instead of beer or hard liquor)
although i do like margaritta etc i like tequilla shots also have one for my bday every year
32. Hairy Back, Neck & Nose
40. Disturbing Laugh
im constantly told i have a evil laught that the same?
53. Talking About Video Games
57. Stupid Tees
(t-shirts with "clever" slogans on them)
83. Rearranging Junk
90. Cell Phone On The Waist
where the ffuck am i suppoed to put it?
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Women (allegedly) don't like their men in plain white underwear? ???
What do they want? None at all? Boxers with Tweetie Bird on them? ???
Heya, Jeff, in my opinion as a semi-middle-aged single lady, the answer would be:
1. If the man has nice, strong, defined thighs, boxer briefs of any color and fabric (I mean, who the hell cares once we know what those nice thighs are capable of)
2. If the man doesn't have the nicest of thighs, boxers of any color other than white (white reminds us girls of our fathers, back in the days when they only came in one color)
3. If the man is very cocky (every pun intended), then none at all certainly makes for easier access when us girls are planning a surprise nocturnal attack
Tweetie bird, I'm afraid, and Irish shamrocks and Valentine hearts and Santa Clauses, would also have to be deal-breakers, regardless of the number of miles that said man runs or laps he swims daily. In fact, a call to the fashion police, or to his mother, would definitely be in order. ;D
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LOL - funny.
I love a guy with creativity and humor, so silk boxers, striped boxers, plaid boxers, and especially important remembering important holidays like St. Patrick's Day and Valentine's Day with shamrocks and hearts, whatever the case may be, is fun! It sometimes like crazy neckties too - but only if thought is put into the creativity. I don't mind the silly banter either. :)
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Awww. Of those that I understand, I think I'm guilty of only a few of them .... and I'm still undateable. :(
Maybe they are the worst ones ?
29. Double denim sometimes (but so what ?).
56. Bad dancing (Two left feet).
60. Going shirtless in public (but only at recreation areas and the beach).
91. Unfortunate ties (my daughter gave me one that had small pics of that little bird in Snoopy cartoons all over it, each one complete with the work 'bonk'. Know what she said ? "Dad, I know it says 'bonk' all over, but don't").
And that's the only unfortunate tie that I have worn in public. ;D
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75. Boners (A "boner" in Oz is an erection, but it surely can't be that in the context of this survey, could it?)
LOL - I can't see how that would be a bad thing.
Jeez - these lists, it's like they wanna put a guy through a machine and give him a personality-ectomy and make them all the same! I don't mind crocs, and a guy can drink whatever beverage he likes. Some of the things on the list bother me, that "word" I wouldn't like to hear, or juvenile humor, and I'm gone. Going dutch on the first date is fine; in fact, I'd insist. I don't mind hearing about an ex early on. :) The plaid boxers are my fave in one of the posts. :)
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Almost all of these are pretty obnoxious, all right. Some more than others. A few, I didn't know what they meant -- and don't want to! :laugh:
But #92, quoting lines in movies? There ain't no reins on that one!
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75. Boners (A "boner" in Oz is an erection, but it surely can't be that in the context of this survey, could it?)
That's the only definition I know of boner.
Seems kind of contradictory to me: Women don't like men walking around with an erection, but they also don't like briefs (underwear) that tend to control something like that!
Oh, well, you can't please all of the people all of the time! :laugh:
I don't know who Ed Hardy is either. Maybe he's related to Damn Kyle (see "Brokeback Through the Looking Glass.) ;D
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I don't know who Ed Hardy is either.
The rule against Ed Hardy seems redundant with No. 69, Skullwear. That's what Ed Hardy is most known for.
(http://i82.photobucket.com/albums/j266/thisiskaty/men_pic.jpg)
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87. Ordering Wine @ Stadium
65. Crocs
37. Excessive Ed Hardy
Well Katherine answered about Ed Hardy.
#87. There are some sports arenas where they will serve glasses of wine. The women in question are saying that seems "out of place" and strange, perhaps pretentious. In their opinion, if you are at an arena for a sports event, order bottles of beer to drink.
#65. Crocs. Ugly shoes. I believe they're made of rubber. They say guys shouldn't wear them.
(http://thesmoakhouse.files.wordpress.com/2008/08/crocs.jpg)
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Thanks for the translations, Chuck. :)
Alas, there are a couple I still don't understand - #51 and # 52. What does "Bro-Code" and "Moist" mean? ???
I wondered about "moist" too, Kerry. I figure it means sweaty or just that kind of nervous dampness some people get. We call it "clammy" in the South. But I don't know if that's what the particular word on the list means.
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#65. Crocs. Ugly shoes. I believe they're made of rubber. They say guys shouldn't wear them.
Crocs should be worn only by little girls aged 5 years and under. ...
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So how long is gonna be before someone makes up a list of what makes a woman undateable?
Or is that too misogynistic?
I say, "Sauce for the goose. ..."
My first candidate for that list would be having three or more cats.
Even two seems unnecessarily excessive. ...
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So how long is gonna be before someone makes up a list of what makes a woman undateable?
Or is that too misogynistic?
I say, "Sauce for the goose. ..."
Actually, I was just thinking I'd like to see a list about women! Yes, if it were written in a douchey way it could be very misogynistic ("Anything smaller than a D-cup" or whatever, but if it were written by imaginative and intelligent people it could be interesting.)
Also, although the list above about men ostensibly represents a woman's POV, I was wondering how men here feel about it. Are those deal breakers?
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Also, although the list above about men ostensibly represents a woman's POV, I was wondering how men here feel about it. Are those deal breakers?
I think its a bizarre mixture of the silly and the serious. Some I just don't get--and I don't mean I have no idea what the writer is talking about. For example, I don't get the objection to carrying a cell phone at the waist. Don't they sell holders made just for the purpose of carrying your phone on your belt? ???
Some of the items could be deal breakers. I hate sandals--or mandals--PERIOD--so I'd never give a guy wearing sandals with socks a first look, let alone a second. (Yeah, yeah, I'd have to give him a first look, otherwise how would I know he was wearing socks with sandals? ;D ) And flip-flops? Don't even think of going there. I can't even stand them on women.
(Today is graduation at the University of Pennsylvania. On my way into work this morning I passed a young woman in her cap and gown--and flip-flops. :P )
Boxers are dorky. I wanna see basket and butt! :laugh: And any man who can't wear briefs is probably undateable because he's overweight, not because of his choice of underwear.
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There's something missing from this list. The biggest thing that makes many of us "undateable" for women is the fact that we're gay.
I daresay that a list of what would make gay men "undateable" to each other would be even harsher.
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There's something missing from this list. The biggest thing that makes many of us "undateable" for women is the fact that we're gay.
Well, that makes women undateable to you, anyway. I bet there are some women out there who would take gayness over combovers or crocs. :laugh:
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I daresay that a list of what would make gay men "undateable" to each other would be even harsher.
Oi. You can say that twice and mean it. :-\
Tell you what, even from a woman's perspective, I've been wondering about something else: "Creepily into Mom" comes close, but what about "Living at home/with Mom/with Parents," perhaps beyond a particular age? Does a woman want to date a guy who is 35 and still lives with his mother?
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Katherine and Jeff, I agree with ya! Where IS the list that make women undateable? How chauvinistic of VH-1 to only focus on the potential faults of the male species, and by association, only on heterosexuals. >:( I didn't see the series, so maybe Chuck or someone who did can tell us if they even mentioned how restrictive they were being. AND I was also wondering if gay men viewed these same traits as deal-breakers amongst themselves.
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32. Hairy Back, Neck & Nose
Tell you what, I bet anyone who finds a hairy back a turn-off would also be turned off by a man who has his back shaved or waxed.
Talk about a no-win situation. ...
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Katherine and Jeff, I agree with ya! Where IS the list that make women undateable? How chauvinistic of VH-1 to only focus on the potential faults of the male species, and by association, only on heterosexuals. >:( I didn't see the series, so maybe Chuck or someone who did can tell us if they even mentioned how restrictive they were being. AND I was also wondering if gay men viewed these same traits as deal-breakers amongst themselves.
Yeah, pretty much Mandy. Although there are some up there that I don't have a problem with at all. For example, the underwear. Why would anyone care what kind of underwear he's wearing? If he has his pants on you can't see his underwear, and if his pants are off, hopefully the underwear is coming off too. BTW, I wear briefs. lol I always have.
I'll look back over the list again later on when I'm not so busy and point out some of the items I haven't a problem with, and perhaps add a few I don't see included up there. :)
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I think its a bizarre mixture of the silly and the serious. Some I just don't get--and I don't mean I have no idea what the writer is talking about. For example, I don't get the objection to carrying a cell phone at the waist. Don't they sell holders made just for the purpose of carrying your phone on your belt? ???
Some of the items could be deal breakers. I hate sandals--or mandals--PERIOD--so I'd never give a guy wearing sandals with socks a first look, let alone a second. (Yeah, yeah, I'd have to give him a first look, otherwise how would I know he was wearing socks with sandals? ;D ) And flip-flops? Don't even think of going there. I can't even stand them on women.
(Today is graduation at the University of Pennsylvania. On my way into work this morning I passed a young woman in her cap and gown--and flip-flops. :P )
Boxers are dorky. I wanna see basket and butt! :laugh: And any man who can't wear briefs is probably undateable because he's overweight, not because of his choice of underwear.
i wear flip flops all the time even in the winter at times i think its the hillbilly in me i go barefoot as mucha s i can i hate wearing shoes
and yes being over weight does make you undateable in our communnity which is why im not even lookin to many queens only lookin for the pretty and not anything deeper nmost just want the quick fuck not the long lasting relationships
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Oi. You can say that twice and mean it. :-\
Tell you what, even from a woman's perspective, I've been wondering about something else: "Creepily into Mom" comes close, but what about "Living at home/with Mom/with Parents," perhaps beyond a particular age? Does a woman want to date a guy who is 35 and still lives with his mother?
ill be 35 and i had to move back to my parents a while back due to my dad having health issues and i havent been able to get back out on my own yet if someone wants to not date me cuz of thatfine doesnt sound like someone i would want to share my life with anyway
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81. Dirty Car ummm thats a problem?78. Whining guilty as charged
77. Jorts & Japris denim shorts are in fashion here (so either we're ahead of the world or more likely decades behind)
(
72. Overly Creative Voice Mail . awww hell I love my voice mail
67. Can’t Throw Ball well I can it just never goes where I want it to
56. Bad Dancing yup thats me ! I put it down to genetics
54. Biker Shorts only when I cycle
38. Open-Mouth Breathing ummm how else am I supposed to breath
30. Wimpy Drinker does that mean I can't have a g and t? I mean I am gay after all
25. Bad Driver (Sissy/Rage) ummm does "if you can't drive you shouldn't be on the road " count
OMG I am staggered I never thought there'd be that many!! Now I know why I am dateless. Oh well now I admit the problems I am half way on the path of recovery? Hello my name is Matt and I am .....
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I was reliable and safe (and neat and clean
And you don't wear Ed Hardy? ;D
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99. Blue Tooth - as in computers? Hell, I don't even have ANYTHING Blue Tooth yet and it's already considered uncool. They must absolutely LOATH guys on dial-up. :P
96. Tanks & Sleeveless Ts - I think guys in tanktops look very sexy! It shows off their muscles!
95. Arm Wrestling In Public - yeah, that macho stuff in public is nothing more than showboating, but it can be sexy to watch sometimes.
94. “The Blank –STER” - I don't think I've ever met anyone who did that. I've only seen it done on TV. Must not be a Midwestern thing.
92. Quoting Lines From Movies - I love it when guys can do that!
91. Unfortunate Ties - my Dad once gave me a Halloween tie with ghosts, vampires, coffins and pumpkins on it. I've NEVER worn it in public! Well, once to work on Halloween.
88. The Flatulence Trifecta - Those Dutch Ovens are a complete turn-off.
83. Rearranging Junk / Butt Picking - Ewwww! Butt picking? Are you serious? I haven't seen anyone do that, I don't think!
79. Murses - Men have been carrying bags instead of wallets in most parts of the world for decades! It seems only the Americans have a problem with it. I think it looks rather sophisticated!
78. Whining - Yeah, whiners can be the shits. I don't mind it every once in a while though.
76. Air Guitar - I never did understand this "air guitar" stuff. They aren't playing ANYTHING! It looks rather bozo to me.
75. Boners - I love it when a guy pops a boner in my presence! lol
74. Fake Swearing - like "gosh" or "dagnabbit"? It doesn't bother me.
72. Overly Creative Voice Mail - not voice mail, but once we placed a "creative" message on our answering machine - "Hi! You'v reached David and Maury. We're not home right now.... well, either that or we just don't want to answer the phone".
68. Speaking In Cartoon Voice - I can immitate Donald Duck! People must like it because they are always asking me to do it! lol
64. Pitted Out Shirts - Ewww gross! Yeah, that would be pretty BAD!
63. Booya - Ever watch CNBC? There's a financial guy on there that says it all the time! It gets annoying.
62. Tap That / Hit That - I've also heard guys say "Hit that"
56. Bad Dancing - most gay guys are pretty good dancers. You generally run into this with the straight guys, who sometimes enjoy going to the gay bars and dancing with the gay guys.
55. Busting Out Porn Too Soon - Eww yucky!
51. “Moist” - What is that?
49. Crotch Grab - Yuck!
48. Holiday Sweaters - Aww! I think guys dressed in holiday sweaters (especially Christmas sweaters) look CUTE!
45. Penis Enlargement - pills are okay (I guess) but those devices are really yucky looking.
41. Getting Drunk On a Plane - A guy once passed out next to me on a plane and he had his hand on my leg! It "apparently" slipped off the armrest and onto my leg. I'm not sure if he did it on purpose or not, but I left it there because he was cute! :-X
36. Burping Loudly & Proudly - I hate that! They think it is funny or cool and there is nothing funny or cool about it.
32. Hairy Back, Neck & Nose - I am not into bears, so naturally I wouldn't like all that excess hair.
30. Wimpy Drinker - I drink cocktails all the time! lol
29. Double Demin - A Jack and Ennis type of thing? I like that!
28. Bicep & Calf Implants - They have bicep implants? And calf implants for that matter? Wow.
26. Speedos - I like Speedos! Do they still sell Speedos? They show off the junk.
25. Bad Driver (Sissy/Rage) - Angry drivers are annoying, but bad drivers can sometimes be cute! They try so hard and they just can't seem to do it! lol
23. Talking in Third Person - That reminds me of an episode from Seinfeld.
21. Moobs - Reminds me of ANOTHER episode from Seinfeld. Remember the "man bra"? haha!
20. Guy lights/ Dyeing Your Hair - No, I think that looks cute on guys most of the time.
19. Bringing Glove to A Game - Seems a bit excessive and unnecessary, but it is not a turn-off. I wouldn't ever do it though.
18. Tighty Whities - I wear those! White briefs! I often wear shorts that look like boxers (they are not though) when I am walking around inside the house with my shirt off, or under my robe.
16. Gross Nails - Yup! I don't like gross nails. Sometimes people cannot help it though, I guess. But sometimes they CAN!
14. Dirty Hair - I like nice, clean, shiny hair on a guy!
8. Hocking Loogies - Ewww yeah, definately gross! And then they want you to kiss them in the mouth! Huh uh! Nope.
5. Bustin’ a Sag - WHY are people dressing like that now? I think it looks horrible! I saw a guy the other day with his pant completely past his waist and off his ass. It was at the top of his legs. I don't know how he kept them up. And then they want to make certain you see their underwear, so they poof it waaaay out and hike their shirt up.
3. Chewing Tobacco - That is DEFINATELY gross! I threw a party once and this guy was spitting his tobacco into a clear glass. It was completely full by the time he left and I almost got sick when I poured it out in the toilet. And I threw the glass away.
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Maybe it's just an Australian thing, but I have never been without female company throughout my life. In fact, I would venture to say that it's usually been easier for me to get a "date" with a woman than a man. Not that I've been the one doing the asking. These women were more often than not happily married and always knew that I was gay. Often times they just needed a handbag to attend functions their husbands refused to attend, and they knew I was reliable and safe (and neat and clean - which often could not be said for their husbands).
Ah, but were they really "dates"? Ever hear the old gay joke: "Of course I know what a date is. That's the two or three hours before sex, right?"
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Women, do you agree with the items here?
Naw, some aren't so bad.
100. Man Shakes
(elaborate hand shakes)
Frat-boyish and somewhat juvenile - yes even the Masons, but not a deal-breaker.
99. Blue Tooth
Not what you have, but the appropriateness of use.
98. Wrong Sheets
(cartoon characters and such)
Not a deal-breaker, but says a lot about the guy.
97. Mandanas
(bandana on the head)
Are they protecting their Jeri curls or are they actually using it as a fashion statement? If they're punks or bohos, I can see dating a guy with one.
96. Tanks & Sleeveless Ts
As long as they are worn in appropriate times - hot weather activity - either mowing lawns, fixing cars or on the beach - otherwise, they're a no-no.
95. Arm Wrestling In Public
Do men do this? ???
94. “The Blank –STER”
(Hi, I'm the Chuck-ster!)
Very immature, but unlikely to come out until a girl has invested some time in a guy, then of course, it's too late. ;)
93. Vanity Plates
("cutsey license plates)
What does it say?
89. Sports Cliches
Like what?
88. The Flatulence Trifecta
(Farting, naming them, giving a "Dutch Oven")
Disgusting, absolute deal breaker
86. Online TMI
(oversharing on Facebook and Twitter)
Absolutely. Says much about the guy. One woman recently wrote an article about a blind date she went on. Nice, date, nothing to write home about, then she found him on Facebook, describing THEIR date which by his description didn't go at all the way it actually did.
83. Rearranging Junk / Butt Picking
Um, yeah. Rearranging junk is permissible so long as it was a quick thing they had to do, not something they do often, which is just gross. Butt picking? Absolute no from the get go.
79. Murses
(bags instead of wallets)
Never knew a guy who had one.
78. Whining
A lot? Yes.
77. Jorts & Japris
(shorts and capris made of denim)
Yep, yep and yep.
76. Air Guitar
Awfully immature. Save it for when you are alone, guy.
75. Boners
Context is everything. If I go out on a date and find out I don't really like the guy or I'm turned off for some reason, the last thing I want is to have the guy show me he has a boner for me! Yuck!!
71. Names For Breasts
("the girls", "fun bags", "the Wodner Twins")
A friend one time went home with a guy she picked up at a bar. As I was driving them to his car, he called us 'chicks'. :P I was like, "Mare, he called us chicks. And you want to go with him?"
68. Speaking In Cartoon Voice
All the time?
65. Crocs
I love my crocs, why should I hold them against him?
64. Pitted Out Shirts
(old shirts that have sweat stains in the arm pit area)
Yep.
61. Playing Dungeons & Dragons
How fanatically?
60. Going Shirtless In Public
What does he look like?
58. Bling
(wearing too much jewelry at one time)
Yep. What's he trying to prove?
56. Bad Dancing
I don't know any guys who Do dance well.
55. Busting Out Porn Too Soon
Yep.
54. Biker Shorts
Only if they have the body for it.
50. Leather Pants
Context?
49. Crotch Grab
Are they related to Michael Jackson?
47. Bad Table Manners
Yes.
50. Cut Off Shorts
Yes.
41. Getting Drunk On a Plane
Awful.
40. Disturbing Laugh
It really starts to grate after a while.
36. Burping Loudly & Proudly
Yes, along with armpit noises. It wasn't funny when they were 6 years old, it's not funny now either.
33. Dad Jeans
???
32. Hairy Back, Neck & Nose
Yes, yes and yes. Men can wax and shave and clip, just like women. Keep it a secret guys, just like women and we'll never know - or want to know.
31. Eminem-Speak
Unless you like that kind of thing.
28. Bicep & Calf Implants
Yes, creepy and shows how insecure the guy is.
27. The Pregnant Man
???
26. Speedos
What's his body look like?
25. Bad Driver (Sissy/Rage)
(either a fearful driver, or angry driver)
YES! Angry driver is a deal breaker for me. Put up with it twice, never again.
18. Tighty Whities
The whole problem with these - and I can speak for a lot of women - is that guys who wear them, rarely keep them white and keep them so long, they're no longer tight. Instead they're gray and saggy and probably pee-stained, and practically threadbare ("but they're comfortable!" is the usual whine, when we women complain). ::)
17. Bad Facial Hair
(untrimmed, bizarre styles)
If you can't do a full one, don't try. Soul patches look like pubic hair that wandered north.
16. Gross Nails
Yes. See gross toenails/feet as well.
15. Not Paying On First Date
They should at least offer.
14. Dirty Hair
Yep.
13. Fur Coats
Fur trimmed coats aren't bad.
12. Bald Denial
(comb overs, pony tails, toupees, hair plugs)
Godawful.
10. Creepily Into Mom
You won't win with these kinds of guys, cut your losses.
9. Excessive Waxing
Of what?
8. Hocking Loogies
Absolute deal breaker.
7. Mandals with Socks
(men wearing sandals and socks)
Yep, gross all the way around. Either shows bad taste or nasty foot problems.
5. Bustin’ a Sag
(Wearing pants that hang way too low, so your underwear is showing)
Are they still 15 years old?
3. Chewing Tobacco
As long as they clean their mouths well and keep the spit cup out of my sight and never do it in my presence, I don't have a problem.
2. Talking About your Ex
Yep, guy is still having issues. Cut your losses.
1. The C-Word
Context?
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18. Tighty Whities
The whole problem with these - and I can speak for a lot of women - is that guys who wear them, rarely keep them white and keep them so long, they're no longer tight. Instead they're gray and saggy and probably pee-stained, and practically threadbare ("but they're comfortable!" is the usual whine, when we women complain).
Which is probably why more men's underwear is actually purchased by women.
I'm sure I read that somewhere. ...
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Ugly is in the eye of the beholder...I think Crocs are great! Of course they're made near Denver. I thought they were made of silicon or some such material.
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71. Names For Breasts
("the girls", "fun bags", "the Wodner Twins")
My mind keeps coming back to this one because I think it's a hysterically funny name. I've been wondering, Do they have individual names? Perhaps Grace and Mary? :laugh:
But it just now occurred to me to wonder whether Wodner was just a typo for Wonder? Like Chuck's cartoon favorites, the Wonder Twins? ???
I'm also reminded of the famous Terri Hatcher line from Seinfeld: "They're real, and they're spectacular." ;D
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But it just now occurred to me to wonder whether Wodner was just a typo for Wonder? Like Chuck's cartoon favorites, the Wonder Twins? ???
Yes, that was a typo, and I'm fairly certain that is where that particular name comes from.
(http://i279.photobucket.com/albums/kk153/gschwartz_bucket/wonder-twins.jpg)
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Yes, that was a typo, and I'm fairly certain that is where that particular name comes from.
(http://i279.photobucket.com/albums/kk153/gschwartz_bucket/wonder-twins.jpg)
;D
I still rather like the idea of "the Wodner twins."
"Hello, I'm Elaine, and this is Grace Wodner and Mary Wodner."
:laugh:
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;D
I still rather like the idea of "the Wodner twins."
"Hello, I'm Elaine, and this is Grace Wodner and Mary Wodner."
:laugh:
I had a lot of laughs today, but this takes the cake!
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One more reason I'm undateable: I have my new cell phone on my belt. ;D
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Alas, there are a couple I still don't understand - #51 and # 52. What does "Bro-Code" and "Moist" mean? ???
I wondered about "moist" too, Kerry. I figure it means sweaty or just that kind of nervous dampness some people get. We call it "clammy" in the South. But I don't know if that's what the particular word on the list means.
Ok, the series was re-run today, and I can answer the questions on these two items.
"Bro-Code" is bascially the code between single guys. Examples:
"Bros before hos". Meaning that if something good comes your way (tickets to a show) you take your "bros" (your male friends) before your "ho" (girlfriend).
When out with the 'bros', don't take a call from the 'ho'. (No cell phone calls from your girl)
What happens with the "bros" stays with the "bros". ::)
As for "moist".....it's just the actual word that women are offended by. Apparently the women surveyed felt that "most" had sexual connotations to it and men should avoid using it with them, unless discussing a very delicious cake.
:laugh:
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Ok, the series was re-run today, and I can answer the questions on these two items.
"Bro-Code" is bascially the code between single guys. Examples:
"Bros before hos". Meaning that if something good comes your way (tickets to a show) you take your "bros" (your male friends) before your "ho" (girlfriend).
When out with the 'bros', don't take a call from the 'ho'. (No cell phone calls from your girl)
What happens with the "bros" stays with the "bros". ::)
As for "moist".....it's just the actual word that women are offended by. Apparently the women surveyed felt that "most" had sexual connotations to it and men should avoid using it with them, unless discussing a very delicious cake.
That's odd. I can't imagine getting all bent out of shape by the very use of the word "moist."
"Bros before ho's," though? Deal breaker. >:( ::) :laugh:
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Chuck, keep trying to explain "moist" to Kerry. Let me know if you want a girls' explanation of it, but I'm afraid I might have to be rather graphic. :o
I actually (since I don't have TV and never saw the series) got the book related to this series up at my library a couple weeks ago. Was a small book with lots of pics and comments, and helpful tips from girls towards "undateable" guys on ways they can fix (or at least gauge) their problems.
I still say that it's sexist that there's not an equivalent series/book about women's 'undateableness'. Inquiring minds wanna know!
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Main Entry: moist
Pronunciation: \ˈmȯist\
Function: adjective
Etymology: Middle English moiste, from Anglo-French, perhaps from Vulgar Latin *muscidus, alteration of Latin mucidus slimy, from mucus nasal mucus
Date: 14th century
1 : slightly or moderately wet : damp
2 : tearful
3 : characterized by high humidity
If a cake is "moist" it means it's not dry, it doesn't make you thirsty.
The women who completed the survey were offended by the possible sexual connotation of the word "moist". That when the men said it, the implication was that just by being with them, it was making them "wet" in their .....how to say this......groin area, thus more ready for sex.
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Well, it's not a list of what men find "undateable", but I got this email today called "Man Rules".
I think you'll like it, and it kinda fits here.
The Man Rules
At last a guy has taken the time to write this all down Finally , the guys' side of the story ( I must admit, it's pretty good)
We always hear 'the rules' From the female side Now here are the rules from the male side These are our rules!
Please note... they are all numbered '1' ON PURPOSE!
1. Men are NOT mind readers.
1. Learn to work the toilet seat. You're a big girl. If it's up, put it down. We need it up, you need it down. You don't hear us complaining about you leaving it down.
1. Sunday sports It's like the full moon or the changing of the tides. Let it be.
1. Crying is blackmail, and witchcraft.
1. Ask for what you want. Let us be clear on this one! Subtle hints do not work! Strong hints do not work! Obvious hints do not work! Just say it!
1. Yes and No are perfectly acceptable answers to almost every question.
1. Come to us with a problem only if you want help solving it. That's what we do. Sympathy is what your girlfriends are for.
1. Anything we said 6 months ago is inadmissible in an argument. In fact, all comments become Null and void after 7 Days.
1. If you think you're fat, you probably are. Don't ask us.
1. If something we said can be interpreted two ways and one of the ways makes you sad or angry, we meant the other one.
1. You can either ask us to do something Or tell us how you want it done. Not both. If you already know best how to do it, just do it yourself
1. Whenever possible, Please say whatever you have to say during commercials.
1. Christopher Columbus did NOT need directions and neither do we.
1. ALL men see in only 16 colors, like Windows default settings. Peach, for example, is a fruit, not A color. Pumpkin is also a fruit. ; We have NO idea what mauve is.
1. If it itches, it will be scratched. We do that.
1. If we ask what is wrong and you say 'nothing,' We will act like nothing's wrong. We know you are lying, but it is just not worth the hassle.
1. If you ask a question you don't want an answer to, Expect an answer you don't want to hear.
1. When we have to go somewhere, absolutely anything you wear is fine... Really!
1. Don't ask us what we're thinking about unless you are prepared to discuss such topics as baseball or golf.
1. You have enough clothes.
1. You have too many shoes.
1. I am in shape. Round IS a shape!
1. Thank you for reading this. Yes, I know I have to sleep on the couch tonight; But did you know men really don't mind that? It's like camping.
:laugh:
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Oh, I found a list online about the 100 things that women do that can mark them "Undateable".
:laugh:
Ladies, you asked for it, here it is! This one is not ranked, it's just a list of 100 behaviors.
wears a ponytail on the date
car that resembles a messy closet
compulsively shops instead of paying bills
has a face piercing anywhere but the nostril
has bad credit
tattoos on their tits
tramp stamp
only follows sports because they have a crush on a particular player
gloats about how they screwed over an ex-boyfriend
goes to the gun range for a girls’ night out
gets regular colonics
cries without actual tears
asks a waiter to customize a entrée or sammich with complex instructions or unreasonable substitutions
has the same haircut that I do
flip flops
extensive animal print decor in dwelling
room dedicated to the color pink, hello kitty, or some other geek item
uses “Be a man” to provoke me into doing things that are clearly stupid
uses eyeshadow up to their eyebrows
over tweezes eyebrows or has them tattoo’ed on
over tan
unkempt hair
acrylic claws
wears mens’ clothing ala Ellen Degeneris
stuff their bras
bad boob job
demand that I accompany them to the mall while they go shopping
have a gay man for a best friend that spends all his free time with her
requires a team of stylists to get dressed
makes it obvious that she loves her pet more then she would ever love you
dresses to compete with other women
wants to go clubbing during the week when I have work
takes a brand name anti-depressant
roots for sports teams I hate
says at some point “Wait! Jews don’t believe in Jesus Christ?”
expects a level of fitness from me that she can’t maintain herself
makes me watch shows that I hate
never lets me watch shows that I love
brags about her bowel movements
brags about never having bowel movements
corrects my grammar incessantly
treats height as a personal choice
gigantic jewelry
wears spandex dresses with rips
still lives with parents because Daddy is loaded
doesn’t wear fashions from the current decade
grandma glasses
gets mad at other women for what they are wearing
color contacts
doesn’t get my pop culture references
dreadlocks (hair can’t be washed when its dreaded)
cares more about the girls I’ve dated then getting to know me
communist
unaware that she is a bad driver
doesn’t laugh, even when she sincerely finds something funny
falls asleep in the movie theater
tells me she tells her mom everything
tells me she’s a bitch
spends 2 hours on her hair each day, but lives in a messy apartment
keeps in frequent contact with ex-boyfriends
uses juggalo slang
faux British accent
buys female celebrity branded merch.
constant nitpicking of anything and everything
can’t deal if I go out without her and hang with my friends
can’t tell when she is not having her period
makes me listen to music I hate, especially in my own car
orders appetizers and then doesn’t eat the entrée
constant whale tail (thong that rides above waistline
thinks Dane Cook is funny, but Jim Gaffigan isn’t
says “Hell-oooooooooh?” if I take more then half a second to respond
Chain smokes
wears fingerless gloves
wears a wig, isn’t being treated for alopecia or cancer
hair extensions
expects me to pay for everything past the 3rd date
annoying regional accent
constantly badmouths her closest friends behind their backs
uses the n word in any capacity other then to describe another situation where the word was used.
in complete denial about her horrible singing voice
was on a VH1 show talking about all the stuff men do to be undateable
schedules dates around World of Warcraft raid times
secret criminal past
did porn
pronounces her a name a different way then its spelled, has the gall to have an attitude about it
stand-up comedian ( I am not going to be in that act)
believes in tarot cards and psychics
won’t tell me if I have something in my teeth or on my face
tells me how to eat my food
chews gum
has a hand-written list of qualities she is looking for in a man
flakes on plans, doesn’t think it’s a big deal
hasn’t taken off nail polish from fingers or toes in months
hates New York City
doesn’t shave legs or armpits, or lip if applicable
asks me detailed questions about my income
wears slogan t-shirts
bald by choice
can’t buy me a decent present when a holiday or occasion calls for it
owns more then two sex toys
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Oh, I found a list online about the 100 things that women do that can mark them "Undateable".
:laugh:
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Hmm. Some of those seem a bit overly picky to object to. Others I can hardly believe anyone would really do.
But maybe men would say the same about the first list.
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I don't understand what some of the things are. ???
"Flakes on planes"? Does that mean freaks out from fear of flying, or what? ???
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"Flakes on planes"? Does that mean freaks out from fear of flying, or what? ???
Maybe it's a misprint and was meant to say "Snakes on a plane!"
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Maybe it's a misprint and was meant to say "Snakes on a plane!"
:o
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Hmm. Some of those seem a bit overly picky to object to. Others I can hardly believe anyone would really do.
But maybe men would say the same about the first list.
It was obviously written by a neurotic east coaster - who else would have a deal breaker being that a woman hates New York City?
Do you think any guy west of the Hudson cares about that? ;D