Author Topic: The Persistence of Memory: New Greenlea Tale  (Read 259689 times)

Offline louisev

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Re: The Persistence of Memory: New Greenlea Tale
« Reply #10 on: March 09, 2009, 09:30:32 pm »
“Mr. Coyote always gets me good, boy,”  Ellery said, winking.  “Almost forgot what life was like before I got me my own personal coyote.”


Offline mariez

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Re: The Persistence of Memory: New Greenlea Tale
« Reply #11 on: March 10, 2009, 01:53:40 pm »
As promised...

Chapter 4:  http://louisev.livejournal.com/289049.html

SPOILERS




Louise, I find this story so compelling.  I really like your use of the stream of consciousness mode. It's very effective, and the way we learn about Henry through his interactions with, and observations of, Wes and Ellery was very well done.  I liked that Henry noted he can sometimes learn more about people from observing and interacting than he can from "testing."  Obviously, Henry won't be "testing" Colson, but I know he'll be watching him closely when they do meet!

So Ellery has already had his meeting with Henry....not a surprise that he found his time with Ellery so interesting b/c Ellery is interesting, and I found his reaction to the "Boy with Violin" card fascinating!

Ellery Cantrell is not his employee. He’s his son

You've got that right, Henry.  Watching Wes through Henry's eyes was so touching b/c we know the depth of his feelings and how much self-control he's demonstrating. 

Stellar writing, Louise.  It's clear you feel energized!  :)

Thanks,
Marie
The measure of a country's greatness is its ability to retain compassion in times of crisis         ~~~~~~~~~Thurgood Marshall

The worst loneliness is not to be comfortable with yourself.    ~~~~~~~~~ Mark Twain

Offline louisev

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Re: The Persistence of Memory: New Greenlea Tale
« Reply #12 on: March 10, 2009, 03:33:56 pm »
well whew! I'm glad somebody doesn't mind getting out of romance and smooching mode!!!  I always feel like I have to EXPLAIN when I do something new.  But there are other features that will distinguish this narrative more than the point of view, but I really don't want to give it all away.
“Mr. Coyote always gets me good, boy,”  Ellery said, winking.  “Almost forgot what life was like before I got me my own personal coyote.”


Offline belbbmfan

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Re: The Persistence of Memory: New Greenlea Tale
« Reply #13 on: March 10, 2009, 03:36:47 pm »
Louise, I can't believe you're into chapter 4 of a new story already!!  :o

I've read chapter 1 and 2 during my lunch break and didn't have time to comment. I was going to wait untill this evening. But then I got some really bad news this afternoon, my sister in law has been diagnosed with bowlcancer and it has spread to her liver and lungs. This news has left us all shattered. I'm terrified thinking of what is to come.  :(

But I wanted to tell you anyway, thanks for the new story. It's been great so far. I'm still reading.
'We're supposed to guard the sheep, not eat 'em'

Offline louisev

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Re: The Persistence of Memory: New Greenlea Tale
« Reply #14 on: March 10, 2009, 04:00:57 pm »
I am so sorry to hear this tragic news, Fabienne!!!  My thoughts are with your family.

I had a burst of creativity over the weekend and decided to try the experimental thing, so we will see how it goes!
“Mr. Coyote always gets me good, boy,”  Ellery said, winking.  “Almost forgot what life was like before I got me my own personal coyote.”


Offline MaineWriter

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Re: The Persistence of Memory: New Greenlea Tale
« Reply #15 on: March 10, 2009, 04:05:15 pm »
Louise, I can't believe you're into chapter 4 of a new story already!!  :o

I've read chapter 1 and 2 during my lunch break and didn't have time to comment. I was going to wait untill this evening. But then I got some really bad news this afternoon, my sister in law has been diagnosed with bowlcancer and it has spread to her liver and lungs. This news has left us all shattered. I'm terrified thinking of what is to come.  :(

But I wanted to tell you anyway, thanks for the new story. It's been great so far. I'm still reading.

Oh Fabienne, that's terrible news! My thoughts and prayers and healing energy go out to all of you...especially your sister in law. How old is she? Is this Dirk's sister?

L
Taming Groomzilla<-- support equality for same-sex marriage in Maine by clicking this link!

Offline belbbmfan

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Re: The Persistence of Memory: New Greenlea Tale
« Reply #16 on: March 10, 2009, 04:22:39 pm »
She's Dirk's younger brother's wife. We're all very close. They're part of the group of friends that we go on holiday with every year. She's only 44 years old, with two teenage daughters.

It's all so unfair...

'We're supposed to guard the sheep, not eat 'em'

Offline louisev

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Re: The Persistence of Memory: New Greenlea Tale
« Reply #17 on: March 10, 2009, 09:43:00 pm »
 
I hope this helps make you feel better...!

Chapter 5:  http://louisev.livejournal.com/289396.html
“Mr. Coyote always gets me good, boy,”  Ellery said, winking.  “Almost forgot what life was like before I got me my own personal coyote.”


Offline belbbmfan

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Re: The Persistence of Memory: New Greenlea Tale
« Reply #18 on: March 11, 2009, 02:53:48 am »
Thanks Louise, I'll catch up later.  :)
'We're supposed to guard the sheep, not eat 'em'

Offline mariez

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Re: The Persistence of Memory: New Greenlea Tale
« Reply #19 on: March 11, 2009, 01:21:10 pm »
(((((Fabienne))))) Here's a hug for today that I'm adding to yesterday's.  We can't have too many.



Chapter 5:  http://louisev.livejournal.com/289396.html


SPOILERS



Wow - I keep using the words "compelling" and "fascinating" but this really is.  I love getting inside the guys' minds like this and seeing everyone through each other's eyes. 

What was Henry's thought about everything in the Sheriff's department leading to Ellery?  Never more apparent than in the bizarre but utterly believable showdown between Esteban and Dupree.  Poor Jeremy - that pool of blood is bringing forth all kinds of feelings inside of him.  Looking forward to more.  Thanks, Louise!

Marie

The measure of a country's greatness is its ability to retain compassion in times of crisis         ~~~~~~~~~Thurgood Marshall

The worst loneliness is not to be comfortable with yourself.    ~~~~~~~~~ Mark Twain