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Do you forgive or do you hold a grudge?

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David In Indy:
I think the world has forgotten how to forgive. Or at least I think it's true in many cases.


In the following video, we see several examples of extreme hurtful acts against another person. Would you be able to forgive so easily and readily? Is our world losing it's capacity to love and to forgive others for their transgressions?

(video clip is about 7 minutes)

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=awqPzXXs_7k

injest:
I don't forgive....not for major stuff. Don't like to set myself up to be hurt again.

well, for most people. Some that I have a previous relationship I can forgive SMALL things..

this actually is not as simple as I thought at first!

 :laugh: :laugh:

karen1129:
I do forgive..............   for myself.

Karen

ifyoucantfixit:




      I believe it can and is done.  But not all things can be forgiven....by every one..    I know I do it in a
  lot of cases.  But eventually its difficul t to forgive someone that continues to do the thing over and over
  and doesnt even acknowledge the things they have done...IT HARKS BACK to fool me once shame on
  you, fool me twice, shame on me.!!

David In Indy:
Sometimes I think people who hurt others are often hurting themselves, and this is why they do it. I think this was one of the messages from this particular scene in the movie.  And I think it's important to break that chain; that vicious circle. People sometimes hurt us. Lord knows I've been hurt in the past for various reasons. But I've also found that often the person who hurt me is hurting too. Maybe even worse than the pain they inflicted in me.

In forgiveness we also free ourselves. And if anyone has seen the movie "The Color Purple" we see Celie becoming freed by her forgiveness. She forgave Shug, and in doing so they became close friends, saving each other from much future pain. A sort of team; helping each other through the trials of life. This would never had been possible without Celie's forgiveness.

We also free ourselves when we forgive because we no longer play that "tape" over and over in our minds. It takes a lot of effort to remain angry at someone. Sooner or later the hurt begins to fade, but if we refuse to let go and forgive, we work hard to maintain that level of anger. And if the person refuses to accept our forgiveness, the problem is now squarely on THEM; not us. We have freed ourselves and can now move on. However, they will remain mired in hate, and probably hurt too.

It is difficult to forgive. But I think the world is quickly turning into a place that refuses to forgive. Look at the media. They are always looking for excuses to shoot others down. They find the very worst in someone, exploit it and then air it around the world as a sick form of entertainment. Look at the nastiness on the internet. There are so many people saying many awful and hurtful things to others as they sit safely behind their computers in total obscurity. I'm glad we have a friendly forum here where these sorts of things rarely happen. Others are not so fortunate.

If only we could remember to be like Celie, and just forgive. The power of forgiveness can be huge if only we remembered to use it.  :)

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