Our BetterMost Community > The Polling Place
Was Ennis Gay?
optom3:
--- Quote from: Artiste on March 17, 2008, 11:10:41 pm ---Thanks optom!
Very, very well detailed and said!!
......
However, I have known some men who have sex with me, often, and never did consider themselves gay!
What about those?
You can answer and others can too,
hugs!
--- End quote ---
Plenty of those in the English public school system.!!!
I know some men have a very high sex drive and also a desire to experience as much variety as possible within certain constraints.I do not think having gay sex as part of an experience to explore every avenue,per se makes you gay.Plenty of men and women are very adventurous when it comes to sex,but are still fundamentally "straight".I know of one man who has had sex with another man,to test the waters.He has indulged virtually his every whim with regards sex,but is fundamentally straight.
I do think Ennis was gay,it was not just sex.There was a whole and complete realtionship with Jack.
I believe our sexuality as humans is defined by who ever we form a complete bond with.That means sex and love in the same package.I love some of my girlfriends and would do anything for them,but have no desire to have sex with them.Equally I have had sex without love.
When the 2 come together,and remain over time,as happened with Ennis and Jack,therein lies your sexuality.Whether you can accept it,is another matter.
We are all complex beings and the urge to have sex for some is very strong,in cases strong enough at times for it not to matter who the person is.Also for many the urge to push boundaries and experiment is very strong.That goes for sex and of course drugs.We may know that what we are doing is not necessarily right for us,but still we do it.It is like a constant search for the next thrill,invariably because there is something lacking in us or in our lives.
I do not see that with Ennis .I see a deeply repressed gay man who inspite of everything,falls catastrophically in love with another man.He never finds that love with any of the women.It is a bond which only comes when you allow yourself to be who you truly are.
The tragedy for Ennis, is deep down I believe he knows where his sexuality lies,he knows he loves Jack,he knows that he is happiest and most at peace when he is with Jack.He knows from the minute they come down from BBM. He cannot allow himself to be that person all the time though.So instead he lets himself have brief snatches of true happiness and love.
Then goes back,almost as if some form of punishment or attonement,to a life he knows will never fulfill him.He needs no church/god to punish him,he does it for himself, by denying himself.
Artiste:
Thanks optom!
You say:
The tragedy for Ennis, is deep down I believe he knows where his sexuality lies,he knows he loves Jack,he knows that he is happiest and most at peace when he is with Jack.He knows from the minute they come down from BBM. He cannot allow himself to be that person all the time though.So instead he lets himself have brief snatches of true happiness and love.
Then goes back,almost as if some form of punishment or attonement,to a life he knows will never fulfill him.He needs no church/god to punish him,he does it for himself, by denying himself.
.........
Fiona: you sure say much, which are great ideas and ideal there!! I must re-read that often... since that touches me, and more than once!!
You must be medical doctor? As well as a writer! Wow, wow!
Merveilleux! Yes:Marvelous!
Would Ennis go live with Jack, do you think? Does anyone think that?
Au revoir,
hugs!
optom3:
Hi Artiste,
lovely tomatoes.One of my favourite snacks is tomatoes thinly sliced on whole grain toast,with a bit of salt and pepper.Can you read my mind????
I am not a medical doctor,I am doctor of optometry.However the amount of therapy/psychiatrists/psychologists I have seen in my life,either for myself or son.I might as well be!!!!!
Also when I was doing Optometry I took psychology as a minor.There is a lot of psychology involved in sight would you believe.Understanding what the patient is really trying to tell you.The grief process when some one loses their sight.
The head aches which are nothing to do with needing specs,and everything to do with stress.There is even a condition called hysterical blindness.The patient is so stressed that they simply refuse to see.Strange but true.
Children who pretend to have a vision problem,to seek attention from their parents,or to cover up some other underlying problem such as bullying.The human eye is a truly fascinating thing,literally in some cases the window to the soul!!!!
Also you can detect so many other diseases from the eye,diabetes,hiv/aids,high b.p and lots more,that you really do need to have some insight into psychology to be able to communicate with the patient.
You have to refer when you see something wrong,and you have to be able to judge how to communicate that to the patient.Do you tell them the whole picture,or edited high lights.I will stop now before I bore you,but it is a subject that obviously I love.
I always used to say,10 mins. to do an eye exam,20 nins to analyse the patient.
Artiste:
Hi Fiona!
Before I forget, the system of Phillip on Bettermost or mine via my compuyor, or something else, is NOT allowing me to-day to add pics (and at times posts too); so I am asking you if you know the plant above? Maybe ask your son if he does? I asked you in your OTHER thread (about your son gardening), but could NOT add it!
............
Your post is so wonderful!!
You say:
Also you can detect so many other diseases from the eye,diabetes,hiv/aids,high b.p and lots more,that you really do need to have some insight into psychology to be able to communicate with the patient.
..........
I wish you can examen my eyes! You angel!
You and I, as I am an artist painter, have things in common! I use my eyes and even create illusions in my paintings!
You know what mind's eye is ??
My straight brother is an optician, an excellent one; only he did ever made me glasses which I could see with! No others ever did succeed! I sure wish he was like you, since he has your talent too!!
........
Back to Ennis being gay or not, your posts on that are too educational!! I like them! Maybe Ennis... is still a puzzle, is he gay or not, when is he?? Etc.;
au revoir,
hugs!
Mandy21:
Hey Fiona, I agree totally with everything you said above -- "repressed", "gay".
You do indeed sound like you love your work -- have you been allowed to work here in the states? Did you ever see the HBO movie "Hysterical Blindness" with Uma Thurman and Juliette Lewis? Very good, if you get a chance to rent.
Your post reminds me I need to go get new glasses. I'm sure bifocals would be in order at age 42. Must do something about that.
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