~~THE PERFORMANCE THREAD~~ **aside** ((action)) %%thought%%

[Meryl]

((The HIGH PRIESTESS returns to the set of B.A.M., having just completed a wildly successful publicity tour for her new book:   Altitude Adjustment:  Getting High on BrokenArse))



** Hello my dears, did you catch me on Leno? 

What's this I hear about a wedding?  Two weddings, in fact!  GUY and LUCISE and JACK and LUREEN.  How exciting!  Will Guy and Lucise be married on the Mountain?  Has Lureen chosen her bridesmaids?  Who will be Jack's best man?   Will big equipment be involved--farm equipment, I mean.  I do so hope I can be of assistance in the planning! **

[Lumière]

((Meanwhile .. at the Del Mar household ..

ALMA finally found the courage to take the darn preggie test
ENNIS will never find out that that time, it was a miss
He busies himself with trying to create some kind of marital bliss
A kiss, a caress, a flip .. well you can see the rest ..







))

[Daniel]

** Hello my dears, did you catch me on Leno? 

What's this I hear about a wedding?  Two weddings, in fact!  GUY and LUCISE and JACK and LUREEN.  How exciting!  Will Guy and Lucise be married on the Mountain?  Has Lureen chosen her bridesmaids?  Who will be Jack's best man?   Will big equipment be involved--farm equipment, I mean.  I do so hope I can be of assistance in the planning! **

YOUNG JACK:

**Yeah, I was kinda resistant, but at the mention of a shotgun, I felt I kinda had ta.**

**My best man is Ennis.... oh, you mean fer the weddin'.**

[Meryl]

YOUNG JACK:

**Yeah, I was kinda resistant, but at the mention of a shotgun, I felt I kinda had ta.**

**My best man is Ennis.... oh, you mean fer the weddin'.**

HIGH PRIESTESS:

** Yes, dear honey-chile, I'm afraid Ennis will not do for this particular duty.  Perhaps JIMBO, or even TIMMY?  Either of them would need some serious wardrobe consultation first, though.  I'll check with CHER to see if she has someone to recommend. **

[Daniel]

HIGH PRIESTESS:

** Yes, dear honey-chile, I'm afraid Ennis will not do for this particular duty.  Perhaps JIMBO, or even TIMMY?  Either of them would need some serious wardrobe consultation first, though.  I'll check with CHER to see if she has someone to recommend. **

YOUNG JACK:

**Well I keep forgettin' about the weddin'. I guess it jes' keeps fadin' from ma mind. Course, all Lureen has ta do is say "shotgun" and I'm called ta heel.**

**If it weren't fer the weddin, though, Ennis'd definitely be my best man.**

[nakymaton]

YOUNG JACK:
** I'd get off those antidepressants if I were you. Ya don't need em that much.**

BULL:

Oh, I know. Though are Valium and sleeping pills antidepressants? Never was clear about that. Anyway, between the equinox and seasonal affective disorder and these nightmares I keep having about Bad Thrillers, it's hard to break the habit. And then I keep hearing this song, "I Got You Babe," like someone is wandering around the set in costumes singing or somethin, and it reminds me about that affair I had with Babe the Blue Ox back some time ago. Still can't forgive him for takin up with that Paul Bunyan.

Anyway, I'm gettin out of this rodeo business. Goin to Mexico. Heard they got somethin or another there for BULLS like me. Better drugs, maybe.

[Daniel]

YOUNG JACK:

**Friend, sounds like ya got a plan there.**

((Jack looks at the postcards but decides not to get them. He goes to put them back on the rack, but the BULL had knocked it over. He daintily steps over the fallen rack and puts them on the counter near the still fuming ANGRY SOUVENIR STORE OWNER.))

**I'll just leave those here then.**

((Turns back to the BULL.))

**Send us a postcard when you git where yer goin'. Let us know how ya been.**

((Jack suddenly steps up and hugs BULL))

**Gonna miss ya around these parts.... Hey, sure you don't wanna stay for that Weddin' we got goin on soon? Sounds like this one'll be a real show. Ya can try and throw me again. Jes' one last time 'afore givin' it up fer good.**

[nakymaton]

**Gonna miss ya around these parts.... Hey, sure you don't wanna stay for that Weddin' we got goin on soon? Sounds like this one'll be a real show. Ya can try and throw me again. Jes' one last time 'afore givin' it up fer good.**

BULL:

Last time I went to a wedding, I got attacked by a horde of 5-year-old girls with flowers. Ain't much worse than that, tell you what, bud. If I wanted flowers in my hair, I would be on my way to San Francisco right now.

I think I would rather be drinking tequila and eating weeds... or somethin like that.

See ya round, hunnh?

[Daniel]

YOUNG JACK:

((Nods sadly.))

**Sure nuff.**

%%

And Jack sat down with heavy heart,
Knowing his life would not be the same.
Having lost a friend in one good part,
One who he'd fought again and again,

But never with hatred, terror, or rage.
Indeed their battles had been quite tame.
Jack watched his bovine friend exit stage,
and wished all the best to one BULL in name.

%%

[saucycobblers]

((Jack looks at the postcards but decides not to get them. He goes to put them back on the rack, but the BULL had knocked it over. He daintily steps over the fallen rack and puts them on the counter near the still fuming ANGRY SOUVENIR STORE OWNER.))

**I'll just leave those here then.**

JBB:

%% WTF???!!! Hey cowboy, ain't ya fergettin' sumthin? You promised ta help me write ma postcard!! C'mon, time is of the essence... chop, chop! An' while yer at it, tell yonder BULL ta watch where he's puttin them hooves. %%