Hi, everyone. I'm not good at these things, and have yet to find a way to properly articulate my feelings about BBM, but on Clarissa's suggestion have decided to give it a shot.
I'm in Illinois. I'm 23, gay male. I live with my boyfriend of 5+ years (well, temporarily not, that's another story) and I work in the music industry. I love film and books, but music is my true passion. It's been my emotional outlet since I was a kid.
I heard about BBM over a year before it came out but saw Jake and Heath were starring, and that girl from Princess Diaries, and rolled my eyes. But when I heard Ang Lee was involved, my ears perked. He's my favorite director (Wedding Banquet, Eat Drink Man Woman, Crouching Tiger Hidden Dragon!) so I immediately changed my position. It wasn't until I started browsing the IMDB boards in mid-December and I stumbled upon a link to the New Yorker short story (this was back when the New Yorker still had it up on their official site!). I sat at work, reading it, and by the end I was fighting back the tears. I was hooked.
The next week, my boyfriend and a friend went to see it in Chicago. Every showing was completely sold out, we were lucky we ordered in advance. I have been to this theatre numerous time, but it was like herding cattle, appropriately, just lines of people throughout the entire building. After the film, we discussed what we had saw. My first reaction was that was a really good movie. That night, I laid in bed, not able to sleep, just thinking about the movie, about everything.
This happened to be the week I was on Christmas vacation, and spent a lot of time alone because no one else was off. It might've been the next day, or 2 days later, but I just started thinking about Jack and Ennis. And I shook my head and I'm like "come on now, they're not real people!" and so on. I was getting ready to leave, still laughing at myself for being so concerned with fictional characters. I walk out the door, I'm running down the stairs, and I just STOP and start crying uncontrollably. I've never experienced anything like that from a movie before, or any work of art for that matter.
Thinking I was crazy, I went back to the IMDB boards, and quickly found I was hardly the only person who had a similar experience. I started posting, and reading, and before I knew it, was part of this community of people who were really touched by the film. It was great, and still is in fact. I ended up seeing it 12 times in the theatres, and one time I was lucky enough to have seen it with fellow brokies!
I guess why it connects to me so much is because I see so much of Jack AND Ennis in myself. Jack is me when I was younger, when I had dreams and ideas and was so young and naive and I wanted nothing more than to love freely and enjoy life, but all I got was loneliness, harassment, and rejection at school, at home, everywhere, and it turned me into an Ennis. Both are still a part of me, but I grew up a bit, hardened, and became an odd mixture. I'm happy with who I am now, and where I've gone, and with the lovely people in my life. But I still yearn to make things better, not just for myself, but for everyone else who feels like that growing up, isolated, alone, because they aren't and need to know that. You end up regretting so much when you allow others to shape you and hold you back. I used to live in fear, and I believe that the message of BBM is the only thing you have to fear is fear itself. Why deprive yourself love and happiness, only to end lonely, depressed, and wishing you had done things differently?
BBM has changed my life. There are other factors, but it has given me the confidence to take more risks, to appreciate what I have more, and to be more honest with myself and those around me. All this, and even from just a technical standpoint, it's just a brilliant, classic film with the power to bring people together, and to change minds.
Sorry for the lengthy post, it's really not my style, it just kinda... happened. I have to get to bed now.
But thanks to Phil and the fellow board members for taking us in! I'm so happy to be here, and you seem like such a lovely bunch of people, I can't wait to get to know more of you!