Brokeback Mountain: Our Community's Common Bond > Brokeback Mountain Fan Fiction & Poetry
Gift of Exile - first fanfic
mvansand76:
I loved it (even though it was a bit confusing at times), you can really read that you put a lot of effort into the writing, it is very good writing! I am really wondering where this is going! Thanks for posting!
Marge_Innavera:
Can you give me some examples of where it was confusing? This story is a writing exercise for me to a great extent; so I truly do want to do fine-tuning and rewrites where necessary. Someone alerted me earlier to some dialgue where it wasn't clear who was speaking.
mvansand76:
--- Quote from: Marge_Innavera on August 22, 2006, 11:35:12 am ---Can you give me some examples of where it was confusing? This story is a writing exercise for me to a great extent; so I truly do want to do fine-tuning and rewrites where necessary. Someone alerted me earlier to some dialgue where it wasn't clear who was speaking.
--- End quote ---
It's the flashback and the parts where Ennis thinks of what might have been. Even though I saw that it was italic, it still confused me at first, but once I understood what it was, I thought it was a really nice touch to the story!
Marge_Innavera:
The first two chapters of Part Two posted this week. Index of chapters:
Chapter 1: http://talkstocoyotes.livejournal.com/392.html
Chapter 2: http://talkstocoyotes.livejournal.com/523.html
Chapter 3: http://talkstocoyotes.livejournal.com/1066.html
Chapter 4: http://talkstocoyotes.livejournal.com/1485.html
Chapter 5: http://talkstocoyotes.livejournal.com/1704.html
Chapter 6: http://talkstocoyotes.livejournal.com/2038.html
Chapter 7: http://talkstocoyotes.livejournal.com/2358.html
Chapter 8: http://talkstocoyotes.livejournal.com/2635.html
mvansand76:
Those last two chapters were beautiful, I love the part where Ennis gets that polaroid of Jack and his reaction, that was beautiful, I'm glad he has that now, I hate to think that Ennis doesn't even have a picture of his beloved Jack... :'(
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