I guess I've gotten more philosophical about it. I just tell myself there's usually no help for it: In most cases, if I'm going to go most places that I want to go in the time I have available, there is no other alternative but flying. The possibility of disaster is always in the back of my mind, but I just try not to dwell on it. I'm fatalistic about it: If there is a disaster I will die, and there's no point worrying about it because nothing can be done about it. And if there isn't a disaster, I'll get to be somewhere I want to be and/or with people I want to be with.
I'm not especially claustrophobic, but it's the idea of being crammed for hours in a cramped little seat inside a giant tin can where you can't see anything that bothers me more than the possibility of disaster.
And I actually like flying in small planes, where you can actually see the world spread out like a map beneath you.
I'm not big on flying, but that's because of the inconveniences and discomfort, not fear. I'm like you -- I figure I'll just leave my fate to Fate.
But also, if I started worrying about plane crashes whenever I flew, I'd have to start worrying about car crashes whenever I drove or rode in a car. Statistically speaking, I believe the latter are more likely. Even if you argue that, per mile flying or driving, flying is more dangerous (the statistics are somewhat unclear), it's not MUCH more dangerous.
I would have flown somewhere on Sept. 12, 2001, without a second thought.