Our BetterMost Community > Chez Tremblay
An umpteenth viewing and... three revelations
ednbarby:
Me, too. Because notice (and I think it was you who first pointed this out, LJ), Jack didn't give that ranch neighbor of his a name when mentioning him to Old Man Twist.
I see Jack going up to Lightning Flat to see the folks for a few days after leaving that last campsite, and I see Old Man Twist saying something snide to him about Ennis (e.g., "Whatever happened to that Ennis Del Mar you always used to mention? Just another one of those ideas of yours that never come to pass?") and him retorting with something like, "The hell with him. I got another friend now - ranch neighbor of mine - gonna come up here with me." And I can see him saying that regardless of whether he and Randall were still/ever were an item just to shut his father up.
To me, the tragedy is all the more heart-wrenching in that Ennis was starting to have a change of heart and that had Jack made him an ultimatum on that November 7 reunion that never came to pass, he might not have let him go. But maybe I'm just thinkin' out loud.
RouxB:
Barb-
I like where you are goin with that thought. I, too, think Ennis was at his breaking point. Given the choice of Jack's way of the highway, I believe he would have taken Jack's way.
For some reason the viewing last night broke my sadness. I cried for hours after watching it (had to have an Elle intervention) but I came away for the first time not sad for Ennis and Jack. I didn't dream about it, didn't wake up with their heartache as my own. I feel no need for fan fiction anymore to make it all better. What a profound shift for me. When all the weeping was over, I just had a deep deep appreciation for the beauty and wonder and power of this story. I had no need to alter or question it-I only had to love it.
O0
ednbarby:
That's wonderful news, Rouxb. You know when I had my moment of Zen where that's concerned? After my first viewing of it in SF in June. As you recall, "The Maker Makes" drove me out of the theater in a puddle of tears. I had to splash my face with cold(ish) water from the restroom sink afterwards repeatedly for several minutes to make my own waterworks stop long enough to intelligibly meet Nick in the lobby (who I still think must have thought I was a total weirdo for being so discombobulated when we met).
What I've not said is that after Little Orphan Andy's, I went back to my hotel room and sobbed myself to sleep. Musta been at least an hour's worth - something I've never done in my life. Sad, but true. And I woke up dry. And at peace with the plight of our boys. That next night, I wept a little, but I could have easily sat through "The Maker Makes" just enjoying the beauty of the song and the art of which it spoke - I just excused myself as a preventive measure. :)
RouxB:
I have joy that I was able to share that time with you :-*
I can't guarantee that this morning's clarity will stay with me ::), I fall back into E/J dispair for odd and unknown reasons but at least I know it can be had. I am re-energized for the story but in a far less dependent way than I have in the past-finally really letting myself feel and acknowledge where my sadness and attachment come from so I can let it go.
I feel like I have come full circle and am back to the beginning-back to where I was last December when I first saw the movie. I am re-discovering the impact it originally had on me and am recommitting to the changes that needed to start a year ago but went by the wayside.
I am back on the path
O0
Momof2:
--- Quote from: RouxB on November 27, 2006, 09:28:50 pm ---Barb-
I like where you are goin with that thought. I, too, think Ennis was at his breaking point. Given the choice of Jack's way of the highway, I believe he would have taken Jack's way.
For some reason the viewing last night broke my sadness. I cried for hours after watching it (had to have an Elle intervention) but I came away for the first time not sad for Ennis and Jack. I didn't dream about it, didn't wake up with their heartache as my own. I feel no need for fan fiction anymore to make it all better. What a profound shift for me. When all the weeping was over, I just had a deep deep appreciation for the beauty and wonder and power of this story. I had no need to alter or question it-I only had to love it.
O0
--- End quote ---
I agree. I think the lake scene was Ennis' breaking point. When he said, Jack I just cant stand this no more. I think he meant that he could not stand the being apart and having to fight to get time together. I think he had come to the terms with the fact that he was in love with Jack and wanted to be together. Then the postcard. I guess that is why life is so unfair. I am happy that they had the 20 years together. That is a long time to be deeply in love with someone. To be so in love that you are one.
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