Kerry's Komedy Klub

[Kerry]

[Kerry]

Rev Fred Nile is the Australian version of Jerry Falwell. 

[ifyoucantfixit]

            I really love your cartoon, drawing style.  Kerry it is wonderful..Reminds me of early twentiet century things.  Like from the New Yorker magazine... very stylish..and funny!

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[dot-matrix]

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A blonde woman was having financial troubles so she decided to
kidnap a child and demand a ransom.

She went to the local park, grabbed a little boy, took him behind
a tree and wrote a note. "I have kidnapped your child. I am so
sorry to do this but I need the money. Leave $10,000 in a plain
brown bag behind the big oak tree in the park at 7 am."
Signed, "The Blonde."

She pinned the note to the little boy's jacket and told him to go
straight home.

The next morning, she returned to the park to find $10,000 in a
brown bag behind the big oak tree, just as she had instructed.
Inside the bag with the cash was the following note . . . .

"Here is your money. I cannot believe that one blonde would
do this to another !!"

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By the time a Marine pulled into a small town, every hotel
room was taken.
"You've got to have a room somewhere," he pleaded. "Or
just s bed, I don't care where."

"Well I do have a double room with one occupant; a Navy
guy," admitted the manager, " and he might be glad to split
the cost. But to tell you the truth, he snores so loudly that
people in adjoining rooms have complained in the past, so
I'm not sure it'd be worth it to you."

'No problem," said the Marine, "I'll take it."
The next morning, the Marine came down to breakfast,
bright-eyed and bushy taied.
"How'd you sleep ?" asked the manager.

"Never better"
The manager was impressed. "No problem with the other
guy snoring, then ?"

"Nope, I shut him up in no time," said the Marine.
"How'd you manage that ?" asked the manager.

"He was already in bed, snoring when I came into the room,"
the Marine explained. "I went over, gave him a kiss on the
cheek said, "Goodnight, beautiful, and he sat up all night
watching me !!"

   Semper Fi !

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The government is considering additional warnings on beer
and alcohol bottles, such as :

WARNING : Consumption of alcohol may make you think
you are whispering when you are not.

WARNING : Consumption of alcohol may cause you to tell
the same boring story over and over again, until your friends
want to SMASH YOUR HEAD IN.

WARNING : Consumption of alcohol may cause you to thay
shings like thish.

WARNING : Consumption of alcohol may create the illusion
that you are tougher, handsomer and smarter than some really,
really big guy named Thor.

WARNING : Consumption of alcohol may lead you to believe
you are invisible.

WARNING : Consumption of alcohol may lead you to think
people are laughing WITH you.

WARNING : Consumption of alcohol may leave you wondering
what the hell happened to your pants.

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There's this blonde out for a walk. She comes to a river and sees
another blonde on the opposite bank.. "Yoo hoo," she shouts,
"How can I get to the other side ?"

The second blonde looks up and down the river, and shouts back.
"Hellooo, you ARE on the other side !!"

 

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A man was in his front yard mowing grass when his attractive blonde female neighbor came out of the house and went straight to the mailbox. She opened it then slammed it shut & stormed back into the house.

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A little later she came out of her house again went to the mail box and again, opened it, slammed it shut again. Angrily, back into the house she went. As the man was getting ready to edge the lawn, here she came again, marched to the mail box, opened it and then slammed it closed harder than ever.

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Puzzled by her actions the man asked her, "Is something wrong?" To which she replied, "There certainly is!"

(are you ready? this is a beauty .)

My stupid computer keeps saying, "YOU'VE GOT MAIL."