~~THE PERFORMANCE THREAD~~ **aside** ((action)) %%thought%%

[Mikaela]

MONROE:


((Suddenly wants to weep))


%% CHER staring at me ravenously from over there, while ALMA's just a few aisles away, and now here's DO-DO ranting and raving, obviously having gone completely off the deep end.......Crazy as a moonstruck mule at midsummer....... Could this day possibly be any worse? %%


((Near-panicked gulp as premonition strikes))


%%Oh yes it could. Now, if ENNIS showed up, that would be it! %%

[louisev]

Meanwhile, Back at the Del Mar Household

ENNIS:

((Notices while he is jamming down beers one after the other while compulsively chain-smoking, that Francine and Alma Junior have runofft to go play on the swingsets.))

Girls?  Girls?

((He goes down the stairs next to the laundromat, staggering slightly.))

%%Shee it!  I'm in no fit condition ta be watchin over my two little girls, I better go dump em on ALMA so I can get good an drunk an maybe have a few a them wringin it out fantasies about JACK again.%%

((Snatches up Alma Junior and Francine, one under each arm, and heads for GROCERY STORE at a wobbly amble.))

[Mikaela]

DO-DO:

%% I don't think I've gotten my point across  %%

((Renews grip on MONROE's arm))

I can go into much more detail, of course, I 'spose I wasn't too clear, was I? Well, as I just said, the High Priestess has......

((Keeps talking. At length. And then some. Envisioning beautiful little bottles of brilliantly shimmering crystal water all the while, her eyes shining to match))

[louisev]

ENNIS:

((Shambling into the grocery store looking bewildered, with one child under each arm, comes up to Monroe, talking to Do-Do, squints, and wobbles.))

Hey, MONROE, you seen ALMA?  Cute little gal, nose like a button, works down here somewheres?

ALMA JR: 

((tugging on Ennis's jacket))

Daddy I got ta go pee.

[Lumière]

((Meanwhile, unaware that ENNIS is in the store .. ALMA concentrates on her work ..




))

[Pipedream]

((Meanwhile, Owl Olivia and lil' Olli Owl have received the wedding invitation.))




Owl Olivia:

%% So two other silly idiots are going to get married! Glad, I won't be the one with the veil this time... By the way, what the f*ck has happend to my cloth?? %%

[Cher]

MONROE:

%% CHER staring at me ravenously from over there, while ALMA's just a few aisles away, and now here's DO-DO ranting and raving, obviously having gone completely off the deep end.......Crazy as a moonstruck mule at midsummer....... Could this day possibly be any worse? %%

(( I lift myself off the ledge and saunter over to MONROE in that disarmingly casual way of mine.  ))


ME (all rich-y and baritone-y):

Now, MONROE, I didn't expect to see that silly bird Do-Do around here either.



I thought her kind had all been run off like the SHEEP who heard JACK's harmonica.  But I am a Moonstruck mule  moon-stitched mules



a moonstruck



fool for you, Babe.

[Mikaela]

MONROE:


((Having just shaken off DO-DO's grip, dons stiffest smile ever))

Oh, hi there, ENNIS!

%%Don't panic, don't babble! He'll notice something's amiss! He mustn't find out about me!

**What was that mantra I had again? Focus on the calm of beans, that's it!**

ALMA? Sure enough, cute as a button..... I mean, I've seen her around.

%% Beans, beans beans, beans...........%%

She's right over there in the condiments aisle.

((Freaks out))

%%Nooooooooooooooooooooo! How could I?%%

[alec716]

((Meanwhile, Owl Olivia and lil' Olli Owl have received the wedding invitation.))

Owl Olivia:

%% So two other silly idiots are going to get married! Glad, I won't be the one with the veil this time... By the way, what the f*ck has happend to my cloth?? %% [/b]

TERRY CLOTH:

** Right here, darlin', just cleaning the nest like you told me to... **

&&  How many more effen' years until that postcard arrives?  &&

[louisev]

ENNIS:

((Stares in a befuddled manner at MONROE, not noticing the lithe charms of Do-Do leaning on the conveyor belt at the checkout counter))

Condoms aisle?  MONROE, I didn't think you had them things here, I thought they was sold at the Drugstore along with the K-Y Personal Lubricant an Jack's Butt Butter.

ALMA, JR:

Daddy, I got ta go pee.