BBM outtakes!
by clockworkgirl21 (Wed Jun 21 2006 08:31:39 ) I got this idea from the Phantom of the Opera boards. We had a lot of fun with it.
Ang Lee: Okay, let's try this scene again. Action!
Jake: Jack Twist.
Heath: Ennis.
Jake: Your parents just stop at Ennis?
Heath: Del Mar. G'day, mate.
Ang Lee: Okay, let's try this one again...
Sucks, I know.
Go to
www.youthrights.com and fight for our rights, damn it!
Re: BBM outtakes!
by russellt-4 (Wed Jun 21 2006 08:49:44 ) Alma jr: Mom, I need crayons.
Alma: Not now............(long pause)............honey, you're supposed to knock the coffee jars over!
Alma jr: Sh*t.
"How was last night?"
"It was fantastic! I can't see!"
Re: BBM outtakes!
by russellt-4 (Thu Jun 22 2006 03:24:22 )
(Ennis shoots elk)
Jack: Whoohoy!(shoves Ennis, who falls over)Whoa, sorry Heath!
"How was last night?"
"It was fantastic! I can't see!"
Re: BBM outtakes!
by DisneyPirateFreak (Thu Jun 22 2006 08:44:13 ) Jack: *tries to miss his shot at the cayote but keeps shooting it by accident*
Ang Lee: Jake, we are running out of cayotes here!
28:06:42:12
Re: BBM outtakes!
by HellsThorn (Thu Jun 22 2006 09:51:45 ) Ennis(in 1st tent scene): what ya doin'?
Jack:I trying to f u c k i n g kiss you heath,come on! I'm not that bad. (*laughs*)
Re: BBM outtakes!
by posworth6 (Fri Jun 23 2006 04:34:48 ) Ignore this User | Report Abuse
Alma: You don't want it to be so lonely, do you?
[pause]
Ang: Cue wind. Wind!!!
Cameraman: Um...it's being a little resistant, sir.
Ang: Dammit! How hard can it be for the wind to blow on cue?
Heath: Let me tell you this one time, Jack f'in Twist, and I ain't foolin'. What I don't know...all them THINGS [shoves Jack.].
Jake: [splash]
Heath: Oh...bollocks.
Jake: WOO-EEE! [shove]
[explosion from the gun]
Jake: ...whoops.
*step* *step* *SLAM* *hat off* *SNOG!*
- Brokeback Mountain
Re: BBM outtakes!
by clockworkgirl21 (Fri Jun 23 2006 16:47:01 ) Ang Lee: Okay, first tent scene.
Heath: You don't need to actually put my hand between your legs like you did last time during rehearsal, you know, Jake.
Jake: I told it, it was an accident!
Ang Lee: Okay, action!
*Jake pulls Heath's hand under the covers, and that's Heath's cue to jump up and act shocked. He does. Jake sits up to comfort him*
Jake: Live in my house
I'll be your shelter
Just pay me back
With one thousand kisses
Be my lover - I'll cover you
Ang Lee: Damn it, Jake! Wrong movie!
Go to
www.youthrights.com and fight for our rights, damn it!
Re: BBM outtakes!
by russellt-4 (Fri Jun 23 2006 17:05:40 ) LUREEN: It's funny isn't it? Husbands never seem to want to dance with their wives, hey why do you think that is Jack?
JACK: I ain't given it much thought. Wanna dance?
they get up on the dance floor and "Somebody's Watching Me" comes on - Jack does all the moves!
ANG LEE: CUT!!! Who's been screwing with the music?
"There's nothing funny about testicular cancer. You have to look for a lump, in a bag of.....lumps"
Re: BBM outtakes!
by jpwagoneer1964 (Fri Jun 23 2006 19:16:00 ) UPDATED Fri Jun 23 2006 19:17:45
JACK" "Maybe I shoot one of the sheep"
ENNIS "With your dumb ass missing the sheep can rest easy tonight"
Re: BBM outtakes!
by kid_alive (Sat Jun 24 2006 11:18:13 ) Heath - I hate the way you talk to me
And the way you cut your hair.
I hate the way you drive my car.
I hate it when you stare.
I hate your big dumb combat boots
And the way you read my mind.
I hate you so much it makes me sick.
It even makes me rhyme.
I hate it...
I hate the way you're always right.
I hate it when you lie.
I hate it when you make me laugh;
Even worse when you make me cry.
I hate it when you're not around
And the fact that you didn't call,
But mostly I hate the way I don't hate you;
Not even close;
Not even a little bit;
Not even at all.
Jake - What the *beep* are you talking about?
Re: BBM outtakes!
by nonoclaudine (Sat Aug 12 2006 10:24:47 ) UPDATED Sat Aug 12 2006 10:25:54
Brokeback Mountain outtake #335.
*Jack puts his hand on Ennis' knee*
JACK: I love you, Ennis.
ENNIS: Jack, I tell you what. Up to now I've
been forgiving and forgetting because
of the way I was brought up. But if you
ever put your hand on my knee again I'm
going to get my gun out of my purse and
I'll change you from a rooster to a hen
in one shot!
ANG LEE: Me no likee script changee.
Re: BBM outtakes!
by idgeet (Sat Aug 12 2006 11:49:42 ) UPDATED Sat Aug 12 2006 17:40:23
Jack spies a lone coyote a couple of hundred feet away. He kneels down, raises his gun, and with the coyote in the guns' sight, fires.
Jake: Oh *beep* I'm sorry Ang.
ANG: Cut!! We need another coyote over here please!
JAKE: I tried to miss... I swear.
...later."
Re: BBM outtakes!
by beans1030 (Fri Jul 7 2006 20:17:05 ) OMG LMAOOOOOOOoooooooooooooo
Re: BBM outtakes!
by johnny-lover07 (Wed Aug 2 2006 07:51:54 ) clockworkgirl21, love the RENT reference.
"To f_ggots, lezzies, dykes, crossdressers too..." -LVBB, RENT!
Re: BBM outtakes!
by Santinos_Bridesmade (Sat Aug 12 2006 18:05:11 )
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During the first tent scene I can hear Jack whisper, "F'k me." I can't imagine the cast's reactions to Jake's improvisations.
Heath and Jake grab at each other. Jake reaches down and unbuckles his pants.
Jake: F'k me.
Heath: WHAT? *jerks away, kneeing him in the groin*
Jake: Oww-ww!! WTF, Heath!? I don't mean actually f'k me!
Heath: Whassamatter with you!?
Jake: Whassamatter with YOU? It's improvisation - !
Ang: I like it!
Heath: What!?
Jake: Yeah!
Ang: I like it. Good subtle burst of passion. Keep it in there. Let's try that again.
Jake: F'k me, Ennis, f'k me!
Heath: You heard him, keep it in there!!
Ang: No, what I meant was -
Jake: You sick mind!! What, you actually want to - ?
Heath: NO!
Reunion scene. They kiss, Jake pulls away.
Jake: You had me at hello!!
Vote to get this higher in the top 250!
http://www.imdb.com/title/tt0388795/Re: BBM outtakes!
by idgeet (Sat Aug 12 2006 18:10:44 )
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LOL
"...later."
Re: BBM outtakes!
by Santinos_Bridesmade (Mon Aug 14 2006 14:06:13 )
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Lasso scene - Heath pulls Jake down with him and starts tickling instead of wrestling.
Jake: (laughs uncontrollably)
Heath: Uncle! Uncle!
Jake: (accidently knees him where it hurts) Ooops! Ennis, oh Ennis, c'mere, baby, c'mere -
Heath: (swiftly kicks him where it hurts, then gets up and hobbles away, holding himself)
First tent scene - Jake feels around and has difficulty finding Heath's hand
Heath: (sits up angrily) A HAND, Jake! You're feeling around for a hand! Can't find it? Know what a hand is? It's this you want! (makes a fist) I don't want a f'king belly-rub or a handjob. Hand. You're looking for a HAND! Know what that is? Huh!? Huh?
Jake: (speechless)
Jake: Aguirre got no right making me do this.
Heath: (grins slyly) I'll make him an offer he can't refuse.
"Jack, I swear...."
Re: BBM outtakes!
by Miss-Padfoot-Lupin (Mon Aug 14 2006 14:28:55 )
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(During the reunion kiss scene)
Jake: Son of a bitch!
(Heath pushes Jake up against the wall a bit too hard. Jake bangs his head and faints)
Heath: Oh *beep*
...
(During the scene where Ennis hugs Jack's shirts at his parents house)
Heath: (Holds a shirt to his face) For *beep* sake, have these things been washed, Ang?
Ang: We ran out of washing powder, you little *beep*! We used it all on you goddamn hats!
Honey, what’s this, what’s happening, what’s going on here?
Re: BBM outtakes!
by idgeet (Thu Aug 24 2006 19:35:44 )
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i like your second one boyskissingboys...
i think mine is funny, so i'm bumping!!
"...later."
Re: BBM outtakes!
by Miss-Padfoot-Lupin (Thu Aug 24 2006 20:30:14 )
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BUMP
Honey what's this, what's happening, what's going on? ~ Karen Walker.
Re: BBM outtakes!
by posworth6 (Fri Aug 25 2006 13:44:58 )
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UPDATED Fri Aug 25 2006 13:46:02
My little take on Santinos' excellent one...
[Reunion scene. They kiss, Jake pulls away.]
Jake: You had me at hello!
Heath: [eyes narrowed] I didn't say hello...
And mine (it's utterly terrible, I know):
[A deleted scene - tent scene #2 activity goes a tiny bit further, then...]
Jake: ...welcome to the suck.
Heath: [wincing] Oh God, Jake!
Cameraman: Urgh...
Sound man: That's disgusting!
Ang: For goodness' sake, Jake; wrong line, wrong movie, and just...plain...wrong!
...I'll think up some better ones later.
'Cause I know a love that will never grow old...
Re: BBM outtakes!
by Clyde-B (Fri Aug 25 2006 22:17:57 )
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The Closet Take 1
In Jack's closet, Ennis gently fingers Jack's clothes on their hangers.
He moves to the rear of the closet, bends down and fondly looks at the old boots he remembers from Brokeback. He picks one up, then lovingly replaces it. He notices something hanging in the small jog at the very back.
He reaches in and pulls out...
A pair of longjohns dressed in a bra and panties.
Ang: cut! Cut! CUT! Wardrobe!!!
Re: BBM outtakes!
by Rio-TERF (Mon Aug 28 2006 15:51:35 )
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bump... I wanna read these when I have time
Licking an electrical outlet will not turn you into a Mighty Morphin Power Ranger.
Re: BBM outtakes!
by skessa (Fri Oct 6 2006 04:06:31 )
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I wanna read these when I have time
me too!!!
i'm a non-native speaker. if you find my language awkward – send me a private message!
Re: BBM outtakes!
by Jasna88 (Fri Oct 6 2006 05:59:32 )
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me too! bump
Once and forever Kings fan
Re: BBM outtakes!
by ncwoman (Fri Oct 6 2006 10:33:13 )
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OH MY GOD...I'm reading these at work and am SO glad everyone's gone but me, cuz I can't control my laughter!!
There are some damned intelligent and funny folks on this board!
Keep it up....it's a good way to counteract the depression one gets from viewing the movie.
Thanks all!
Re: BBM outtakes!
by androphile (Mon Oct 9 2006 14:53:38 )
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[Randy]: Twist, you wasn't gettin paid to leave the dogs babysit the sheep while you two stemmed yer hose . . . sheee-it.
[Jake]: (chuckling) Good Freudian slip there, Randy.
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Re: BBM outtakes!
by jabberwockey987 (Mon Oct 9 2006 15:14:28 )
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UPDATED Mon Oct 9 2006 15:23:25
(Jake fires at a coyote and misses)
JAKE: Sh*tty f*k!
ANG: CUT!
(try again)
JAKE: Muthaf*king sh*t!
ANG: CUT! Jaaake!
(try again)
JAKE: To hell with sh*t!
ANG: CUT!
(try again)
JAKE: Damm the sh*t!
ANG: CUT! How many times must I tell you, it's "DAMN IT! Sh*t!"
First tent scene, Jake puts Heath's hand to his you-know-where and does the little hand-job thing.
JAKE: (opens his eyes) Is it weird that this feels good?
(reunion kiss)
Heath slams Jake agains tthe wall and devours him. Jake jerks away.
JAKE: GARLIC BREATH!! Damnit, Heath!
ANG: CUT!
Re: BBM outtakes!
by ncwoman (Fri Oct 27 2006 19:45:09 )
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BUMP to keep this thread going...more more more! LOL
Ole' Brokeback has got me good...
Re: BBM outtakes!
by pockethankie (Wed Nov 8 2006 14:46:10 )
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borrowed from my friend Roland over on Bettermost
Michelle - You still go fishin' with Jack Twist?
Heath - Yeah, we go up on the f-ing mountain every couple months...
Ang - Cut!
Michelle - You still go fishin' with Jack Twist?
Heath - Yeah, we go f-ing up on the mountain every couple of months...
Ang - Cut!
Michelle - You still go fishin' with Jack Twist?
Heath - Yeah, we go up on the mountain to f- every couple of months...
Ang - Cut!
Michelle - You still go fishin' with Jack Twist?
Heath - Yeah, we go up on the mountain every f-ing couple of months...
Ang - Cut! Heath! There's no "f-ing" in this scene. None!
Heath - Huh? Then what the hell is my motivation?
"Forget about what you thought you were and just accept who you are."
Re: BBM outtakes!
by ncwoman (Wed Nov 8 2006 19:31:58 )
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ROFLMAO!!!!
Ole' Brokeback has got me good...
[Post deleted]
UPDATED Wed Nov 8 2006 21:49:17
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Re: BBM outtakes!
by pockethankie (Wed Nov 8 2006 22:50:48 )
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Well ClancyPants I certainly would have credited you as well if I had known! Thanks for sharing I think it's one of the funniest.
"Forget about what you thought you were and just accept who you are."
Re: BBM outtakes!
by pockethankie (Wed Nov 8 2006 22:54:37 )
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Alma jr: Mom, I need crayons.
Alma: Not now............(long pause)............honey, you're supposed to knock the coffee jars over!
Alma jr: Sh*t, uh I mean shoot, Ooops I think I'm in trouble....
"Forget about what you thought you were and just accept who you are."
Re: BBM outtakes!
by pockethankie (Wed Nov 8 2006 22:56:52 )
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UPDATED Wed Nov 8 2006 22:57:19
and this one was on the original thread but I don't remember who wrote it only that I found it hilarious.
Jake- Hell yes I been to Mexico. Is that *beep* problem?
Heath - I hate the way you talk to me
And the way you cut your hair.
I hate the way you drive my car.
I hate it when you stare.
I hate your big dumb combat boots
And the way you read my mind.
I hate you so much it makes me sick.
It even makes me rhyme.
I hate it...
I hate the way you're always right.
I hate it when you lie.
I hate it when you make me laugh;
Even worse when you make me cry.
I hate it when you're not around
And the fact that you didn't call,
But mostly I hate the way I don't hate you;
Not even close;
Not even a little bit;
Not even at all.
Jake - Heath.. What the *beep* are you talking about?
CUT!
"Forget about what you thought you were and just accept who you are."
[Post deleted]
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Re: BBM outtakes!
by stargirl84 (Tue Jan 2 2007 23:39:14 )
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LOL! Isn't that poem from 10 Things I Hate About You?
