Brokeback Mountain: Our Community's Common Bond > Brokeback Mountain Open Forum
Why are we like this?
Aussie Chris:
Hey Katherine et al, well it's been a while but I couldn't resist posting in response to this excellent question, and I think I have a very simple explanation for the Brokeback-effect: the people who are moved by it are ready to heal. Everyone has emotional baggage, but the worst thing we all do is settle for less than our hearts desire. Or maybe there is one thing that is worse; we convince ourselves that we are undeserving. We spend so much time lowering our expectations that we forget that we ever had any. And in Ennis we see ourselves and the fruit of such an existence.
But as I said, it's not that we have issues to deal with, but that we are ready to deal with them - to be healed. For me this was about letting go of the shame I had for falling for a straight guy a decade ago, building up a relationship in my head before one actually existed and then being too stubborn to let it go. This is all just part of growing up to be sure, but so damaging was the fallout of this situation that I refused to let myself feel that sort of love again, and then there was the nice touch of a double helping of denial to make it all seem "ok".
Not being ready to heal is just like leading a thirsty horse to water, if the horse doesn't know that it's thirsty then it might not think to drink. For viewers of Brokeback Mountain it's the same thing. Someone may have the worst case of loneliness and regret in the world, but unless they are ready to face this, then all they will see is "just a movie" and nothing more. For these people, I have nothing but compassion and understanding - I don't think they are "less" because of this, but I do think we are more.
serious crayons:
Hey Chris, it's so great to see you! Our paths haven't crossed much lately, and I've missed you because I've always really liked your way of looking at things. You make a good point. I would bet many people on this site would acknowledge something in their lives -- a change they want to make, an event in the past they haven't fully reconciled, whatever -- that makes them connect with Brokeback.
Thanks for sharing your story of your long-ago ill-fated relationship. That must be hard to go through, with demographically limited choices and social prejudices making it all the worse. We all have unrequited loves, I suppose, but sexual-orientation mismatches must so complicate matters.
For me, it's about uncertainty in my current situation: I recently moved, my kids hate it here, my husband and I aren't getting along, everything's frustrating and chaotic. I don't usually relate to Alma, but sometimes I feel like her: sitting in pajamas drinking cold coffee, kids screaming in the background, husband off to ... well, in my husband's case, work. Other times I can relate to Ennis, feeling like I should make changes but afraid to upset the status quo. And other times Jack, ready for a better life but not finding someone willing to seek it.
On the other hand, I think another part of Brokeback-effect (good term, by the way!) for me is escape -- which I suppose means I'm looking for a way not to acknowledge and fix real life, but to stand it without facing it. Jack's and Ennis' world is heartbreaking, all right, but it's also such a comforting place -- someplace I can feel at home. When I watch the movie, it's almost (I know this sounds silly!) like I'm among friends.
Amber:
:) First of all - Hello! I'm new to BetterMost.net, and new to Brokeback Mountain as well. I saw it for the first time two weeks ago.
I haven't been stuck on this movie for 5 months but for these past two weeks it's all I can think about. My husband thinks I'm slightly crazy although he never says so - he's a good guy. In fact, I've convinced him that spending our honeymoon up in Calgary, Canmore and Kananaskis, Alberta is a great idea - where I can explore the filming sites. I'm lucky.
I wish I knew why this movie grabbed a hold of me so much. It's often the last thing I think about at night and the first thing I think about in the morning. I don't think of Jack or Ennis as characters but as real people and friends. The movie seems intensely real to me.
I find myself insanely jealous of the love and passion between Jack and Ennis and I wish I had even a little bit of that passion for myself. Don't get me wrong - I love my husband immensely ... but the passion of that reunion kiss is unmatched in my relationship!
Anyways I just wanted to say that I'm part of the club here, can't get Brokeback Mountain outta my mind!! I'm sure you'll learn more about me as I post more often!
Looking forward to reading more posts!
Aussie Chris:
I think there's also another quality that is common with Brokies, we all have as a core-value that a love like Jack and Ennis' is more than a real phenomenon, it is something that we have all been open to for as long as we can remember. That knowledge that there is a person out there that makes your heart sing and completes you in ways that you couldn't even begin to imagine before you've met them. As tragic the story of Jack and Ennis is, a Brokie see an affirmation of love that has the power to conquer fear, and yet doesn't because of fear. All of us are text book demonstrations of the expression: when you look into the abyss, the abyss looks into you.
Aussie Chris:
Oh, and I nearly forgot to say that you for the lovely compliments, just at the very moment when I needed it. *MWAH* My cup of love floweth over! ;D
Navigation
[0] Message Index
[#] Next page
[*] Previous page
Go to full version