Thanks for pointing me to this thread, Meryl. I watched BBM again on Christmas Eve, exactly 3 years to the day from my first, life-changing viewing. And I laughed through so much of it, 'cause every line, every scene reminded me of some cartoon or quip or scene that we had made into our own. The thread on IMdB (can't remember the name) that made everything so funny!
And I was amazed too that the movie was so impeccable upon viewing so much later. Every word, every shot, every minute tight and meaningful, exposing each character more deeply and forwarding the story powerfully and effortlessly.
In the scene where Ennis is running off to another fishing trip with Jack, and Alma's sitting smoking at the kitchen table, wrestling with her feelings...the look in her eyes after he runs out the door having almost forgotten his creel case, is so powerful, so telling, such a quiet and pviotal moment.
BBM changed my life, but I could also say I saw it at a moment where I wanted my life to change. There was change in the air, looming on the horizon, and BBM pointed the way for me to see that the change required was in the silent internal spaces in my soul.
I'm not Ennis, and I'm definitely not Jack, but I could see my own limitations in each, and knew I did not want to stay stuck by those limitations, that I didn't want to end up either figuratively dead or stuck in a dead-end place. BBM helped me see how much I wanted to embrace life on my own terms.
And the re-viewing recently was a complete affirmation of all of that. I am not the same, I am not living the same life, and I know BBM showed me the cracks in the foundation of a life I had built but couldn't sustain.
I knew something had fundamentally shifted inside of me, and over the past 3 years, I have embraced that original pull to change and given it room to grow inside of me. It's still in process, no doubt, but now I can watch the movie, and appreciate the story and it's powerful sorrow without feeling that I'm condemned to living my life the same way.
Thanks so much to each one for the wonderful friendship that I found here. Certainly some craziness and some drama, but mostly wonderful friendship!