The World Beyond BetterMost > Anything Goes
Kerry's Komedy Klub
dot-matrix:
They were together in the house, just the two of them.
It was a cold, dark, stormy night.
The storm had come quickly and each time the thunder
boomed, he watched her jump.
She looked across the room and admired his strong
appearance . . . and wished that he would take her in his
arms, comfort her and protect her from the storm.
Suddenly, with a pop, the power went out . . .
She screamed . . .
He raced to the sofa where she was cowering.
He didn't hesitate to pull her into his arms.
He knew this was a forbidden union and expected her
to pull back. He was surprised when she didn't resist
but instead clung to him.
The storm raged on.
They knew it was wrong . . .
Their families would never understand . . .
So consumed were they in their FEAR that
they heard no opening of doors, . . . just
the faint click of a camera.
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dot-matrix:
Miracle Cure ~~ The magic effects of white wine.
Do you have feelings of inadequacy?
Do you suffer from shyness?
Do you sometimes wish you were more assertive?
If you answered Yes to any of those questions, ask your
doctor or pharmacist about White Wine.
White Wine is the safe natural way to feel better and more
confident about yourself and your actions. White Wine
can ease you out of your shyness and let you tell the world
that you're ready and willing to do just about anything.
You will notice the benefits of White Wine almost immediately
and with a regimen of regular doses you can overcome any
obstacles that prevent you from living the life you want to live.
Shyness and awkwardness will be a thing of the past and you
will discover many talents you never knew you had. Stop hiding
and start living with White Wine.
However, White Wine may not be right for everyone. Women
who are pregnant or nursing should not use White Wine.
However, women who wouldn't mind nursing or becoming
pregnant are encouraged to try it.
Side effects may include dizziness, nausea, vomiting, incarceration,
erotic lustfulness, loss of motor control, loss of clothing, loss of
money, delusions of grandeur, table dancing, headache, dry mouth,
dehydration, and a desire to sing Karaoke and play all night rounds
of Strip Poker, Truth or Dare, and Naked Twister.
WARNING.
The consumption of White Wine may make you think you are
whispering when you are not.
The consumption of White Wine is a major factor in dancing
like an idiot.
The consumption of White Wine may cause you to tell your
friends over and over again, that you love them.
The consumption of White Wine may cause you to think you
can sing.
The consumption of White Wine may lead you to believe that
ex-lovers are really dying for you to ring them at 4 in the morning.
The consumption of White Wine may make you think you can
logically converse with members of the opposite sex without
spitting.
The consumption of White Wine may create the illusion that you
are tougher, smarter, faster and better than most people.
The consumption of White Wine may lead you to think people
are laughing WITH you.
The consumption of White Wine may be a major factor in
getting your ass kicked.
NOW JUST IMAGINE WHAT YOU COULD ACHIEVE WITH
RED WINE.
dot-matrix:
On their way to get married a young Catholic couple is
involved in a fatal car accident. The couple found them-
selves sitting outside the Pearly Gates waiting for St Peter
to process them into Heaven. While waiting, they begin to
wonder; could they possibly get married in Heaven ?
When St Peter showed up, they asked him. St Peter says,
"I don't know. This is the first time anyone has asked.
Let me go and find out," and he leaves.
The couple sat and waited, and waited. Two months passed;
the couple was still waiting As they waited, they discussed that
IF they were allowed to get married in Heaven, what was the
eternal aspect of it all. "What if it doesn't work ?" they
wondered. "Are we stuck together FOREVER ?"
After yet another month, St Peter finally returns, looking
somewhat bedraggled. "Yes," he informs the couple, "you
CAN get married in Heaven."
"Great," said the couple, "But we were jusy wondering, what
if things don't work out ?" Could we also get a divorce in
Heaven ?"
St Peter, red-faced with anger, slams his clip-board onto
the ground.
"What's wrong ?" asked the frightened couple.
"OH COME ON," St Peter shouts, "It took me 3 months
to find a priest up here ! Do you have ANY idea how long
it's going to take me to find a LAWYER ?"
Katie77:
:laugh: :laugh: :laugh: :laugh: :laugh: :laugh:
That was a beauty dot...
Katie77:
I received this today, from an old friend, who is NOT aware of my Brokeback obsession...
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