The World Beyond BetterMost > Anything Goes
Kerry's Komedy Klub
Kerry:
Katie77:
A major International company was looking to
hire someone for an important position,
so they interviewed dozens of applicants and narrowed their search down
to three people from different parts of the world.
In an attempt to pick one of them, they decided to give them all the same
question to answer within 24 hours, and the one with the best answer would get the job.
The question was: A man and a woman are in bed, nude.
The woman is lying on her side with her back facing the man, and the man is lying on his side facing the woman's back.
What is the man's name?
After the 24 hours was up, the three were brought in to give their answers.
The first, from Canada, says
'My answer is, there IS no answer.'
The second, from New Zealand, says
'My answer is that there is no way to determine the answer with the information we were given.'
The third one, from Australia, says
'I'm not exactly sure, but I have it narrowed down to two names.
It's either:
Willie Turner or Willie Naylor.'
The Australian got the job...
Kerry:
dot-matrix:
Three Blondes were all applying for the last available position on the Texas Highway Patrol.
The detective conducting the interview looked at the three of them and said, "So y'all want to be cops, huh?"
The blondes all nodded.
The detective got up, opened a file drawer and pulled out a folder Sitting back down, he opened it and pulled out a picture, and said, "To be a detective, you have to be able to detect. You must be able to notice things such as distinguishing features and oddities, such as scars and so forth." So saying, he stuck the photo in the face of the first blonde and withdrew it after about two seconds.
"Now," he said, "did you notice any distinguishing features about this man ?"
The blonde immediately said, "Yes, I did. He has only one eye!"
The detective shook his head and said, "Of course he has only one eye in this picture! It's a profile of his face! You're dismissed!"
The first blonde hung her head and walked out of the office.
The detective then turned to the second blonde, stuck the photo in her face for two seconds, pulled it back and said, "What about you? Notice anything unusual or outstanding about this man?"
"Yes! He only has one ear!"
The detective put his head in his hands and exclaimed, "Didn't you hear what I just told the other lady? This is a profile of the man's face! Of course you can only see one ear!! You're excused too!"
The second blonde sheepishly walked out of the office.
The detective turned his attention to the third and last blonde and said, "This is probably a waste of time, but..." He flashed the photo in her face for a couple of seconds and withdrew it, saying, "All right, did you notice anything distinguishing or unusual about this man?"
The blonde said, "I sure did. This man wears contact lenses."
The detective frowned, took another look at the picture and began looking at some of the papers in the folder.
He looked up at the blonde with a puzzled expression and said, "You're absolutely right! His bio says he wears contacts! How in the world could you tell that by looking at his picture?"
The blonde rolled her eyes and said, "Well, Helloooo! With only one eye and one ear, he certainly can't wear glasses."
Katie77:
Two Irishmen were standing at the base of a flagpole, ( looking up.)
A blonde walks by and asked them what they were doing.
Paddy replied, 'We're supposed to be finding the f-'n height of this flagpole, but we don't have a f-'n ladder.'
The blonde took out an adjustable spanner from her bag, loosened a few bolts and laid the flagpole down. She got a tape measure out of her pocket, took a few measurements, and announced that it was 18 feet 6 inches.
Then, she walked off.
Mick said to Paddy, 'Isn't that just like a blonde! We need the f-'n height - and she gives us the f-'n length.'
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