Discrimination

[David In Indy]

Have you ever felt discriminated against?

On these boards we have discussed discrimination the Gay community faces, but as we all know, there are many other forms of discrimination out there.

Discrimination HURTS.   

The Merriam Webster dictionary defines discrimination as: "To distinguish or to show favor or disfavor unjustly".

My mother did her best to shield me from discrimination, and this is BEFORE she realized I was gay. Because, not only am I a gay man, but I also have Native American and African American ancestry. My mother knew discrimination, having been raised as a Native American/African American in the 1930's and 1940's. I suppose she wanted to keep me from experiencing the same hatred and injustice she was exposed to as a child.

The first time I heard a racial slur aimed at my family was when I was about 5 or 6 years old. I was shopping with my mother and her father (my grandfather, who looked quite a bit like Ossie Davis) and I remember hearing someone say "HUMPH! Now that's HIGH YELLOW if I ever saw it!" This woman was staring right at us when she said it, and later I asked my mother what "High Yellow" meant, and she told me it was a hateful word for people like us. People like us?  Some people pronounced it "High Yeller" which was even MORE offensive. Since I didn't look black, my mother always told me to never tell anyone about it. "Even one teeny tiny drop of Black blood is too much" she would tell me. I  didn't understand it then, but I do now. The African American community would never accept me because I didn't look Black. The White community would never accept me because I wasn't White.

I had a harder time hiding my Native American heritage, since I have many of the typical Native American features;  high cheekbones, reddish brown complexion, etc. Back when I was little, it definitely WAS NOT COOL to be Native American. We were perceived as beggars, robbers and liars.

And since I was raised Roman Catholic in a predominantly Protestant state, I faced some discrimination because of my religion.

But there are many other forms of discrimination, aren't there? Discrimination against obese people, Jewish people, handicapped people, foreign people, and other people too.

Have you ever felt discriminated against? Why? What happened and what did you do about it?

[Ellemeno]

David, if your grandfather looked like Ossie Davis, he was probably one handsome, noble-looking man.  I always admired Ossie Davis.  He and his wife Ruby Dee may have been the first celebrities I ever heard of, when I was a child, who put their fame to good use by speaking up about important things.

I may come back tomorrow and write about my few experiences with discrimination.  Not up for looking at them myself, right now.  Great topic, thanks for telling us some of your experiences.    It will be interesting to hear the diverse experiences of our members.  I have thought before that this is part of what draws many of us to BBM, the connection of feeling outside the norm somehow. 

[opinionista]

My grandpa was a black man. He looked a lot like the late Cuban singer Compay Segundo without the cigar. Ever heard of him? Here's a picture:



He suffered discrimination not just for being black but also for growing up poor. A lot of people think that hispanics aren't racist but a lot are and very much so. I know this is a statement not everyone would agree with, but it is the truth. There's a common say in Puerto Rico that goes: Oh you know he's... uhm... black but such a sweet person. That's a very racist statement, IMO.

Anyway, my grandpa told me discrimination taught him to be stronger and to fight for what he wanted. And he did. He became a well to do and a highly respected person and professional.

I never really suffered racial discrimination in Puerto Rico. My grandma was a white woman and my dad is a white man, so I'm not exactly black. My skin is dark but hair is straight so, I look like the typical hispanic woman. Like basically everyone else in Puerto Rico.  But I faced discrimination when I moved to the United States. Don't get me wrong I met a lot of wonderful people. It wasn't that people treated me bad but that they have this terrible image of Puerto Ricans. And though they said, I was an exception, because I happen to come from a well to do family and can afford to dress well and get an education, they would say terrible things about Puerto Ricans in general that hurt just the same. "They are a bunch of drug addicts, theives," etc. As if they aren't white and blond drug addicts and thieves. I mean look at Timothy McVeigh. He was white and blond as they make it but also a terrorist.

Sure, some Puerto Ricans are pure lowlifes, but as it happens in all ethinc groups they constitute a minority. I've always respond that. Some agreed others would simply ignored me. But more importantly I applied my grandpa's motto. Feel sorry for them, because they aren't capable of seeing beyond skin color or ethnicity and they're missing the experience of learning something new and meeting great and wonderful people.

And it is true. My current neighbors are arabs. I have a good relationship with them. They're very nice. Sometimes they invite me to dinner, and I have tried wonderful home made arab food. Their hummus is the best I have ever tried.

[David In Indy]

David, if your grandfather looked like Ossie Davis, he was probably one handsome, noble-looking man.  I always admired Ossie Davis.  He and his wife Ruby Dee may have been the first celebrities I ever heard of, when I was a child, who put their fame to good use by speaking up about important things.

Yes, he looked quite a bit like Ossie Davis. I have some pictures of him. I'll get them scanned and uploaded! 

My grandpa was a black man. He looked a lot like the late Cuban singer Compay Segundo without the cigar. Ever heard of him? Here's a picture:



He suffered discrimination not just for being black but also for growing up poor. A lot of people think that hispanics aren't racist but a lot are and very much so. I know this is a statement not everyone would agree with, but it is the truth. There's a common say in Puerto Rico that goes: Oh you know he's... uhm... black but such a sweet person. That's a very racist statement, IMO.

It's a terrible thing when we are raised to be ashamed of who we are; especially when it comes from our parents. I can understand why my mother did it; she was trying to protect me, but it doesn't make things any less painful. I've learned to be proud of my Native American and Black heritage, and there's a WHOLE LOT to be proud of too.

Each person in this world is like a thread which is a part of a very large and beautiful tapestry. I am borrowing this from some fanfic I read a while ago, and I thought it was very beautiful and very true. Each person in this world has some wisdom to impart and a story to tell, no matter who they are or where they live. Everyone has a story, and the world suffers when we isolate people because of discrimination and intolerance. Fortunately things are getting better (slightly) for Black people and Native people. We still have a very long way to go with the Gay people in our country and in the world.   

[injest]

I have experienced discrimination based on income...(or lack thereof)

When I was growing up we were very poor. but even now I still run into people that think that because they have a Hummer they are better than other people...

My mother worked hard all her life. Raised five kids by herself. A couple of years ago, she was standing under an awning downtown Longview. She was waiting for my niece, who was taking a class at a art museum. The owner of the awning (an attorney) came out with a mop and told her to start cleaning up.....no loitering!

I am still FURIOUS about that. I felt so sorry for her....I guess he thought she was a homeless person..

[Kelda]

Please tell me off if I am being too forward or am out of line but I have a question....

My mother did her best to shield me from discrimination, and this is BEFORE she realized I was gay. Because, not only am I a gay man, but I also have Native American and African American ancestry. My mother knew discrimination, having been raised as a Native American/African American in the 1930's and 1940's. I suppose she wanted to keep me from experiencing the same hatred and injustice she was exposed to as a child.

The first time I heard a racial slur aimed at my family was when I was about 5 or 6 years old. I was shopping with my mother and her father (my grandfather, who looked quite a bit like Ossie Davis) and I remember hearing someone say "HUMPH! Now that's HIGH YELLOW if I ever saw it!" This woman was staring right at us when she said it, and later I asked my mother what "High Yellow" meant, and she told me it was a hateful word for people like us. People like us?  Some people pronounced it "High Yeller" which was even MORE offensive.

David, I've never heard this expression before - if you don't mind can you explain it? Is this in reference to the native american or african american origin?

Also, can I ask another question.. when I met up with an old friend who emigrated to the US when we were 14 a few years ago in Washington DC, I was commenting on liking somebodys tshirt and she asked who? what tshirt?  and I said the coloured guy over their wearing the purple top.

And she shoosshed me, saying You can't say THAT - you say black over here.

Can I ask why the word coloured to describe somebodys skin is deemed offensive in the US?

I've been lucky to have any discrimation minimised given that I grew up in the 80's.. In addition I have a very thick skin and will defend myself or others to the hilt, but definitely I have felt it a little bit not necessarily directly but- a) from being from a poor single parent family, and b) being female.

I'm sure in a previous life I was probably a suffragette.. maybe I associated with Emiline Pankhurst back in the days!

[injest]

High yellow meant that the person had a lot of 'white' mixed ...and it was considered to be not a good thing to be 'mixed'. It was 'better' to either be ALL black...or all white....(or all Native American).

Coloured was used by bigots so much that it began to take on a bad connotation...it is considered demeaning.

[David In Indy]

High yellow meant that the person had a lot of 'white' mixed ...and it was considered to be not a good thing to be 'mixed'. It was 'better' to either be ALL black...or all white....(or all Native American).

Coloured was used by bigots so much that it began to take on a bad connotation...it is considered demeaning.

What Jess said, Kelda.

Most of the African American side of my family still lives in the South, in Louisiana near New Orleans. Most of the French side of my family also still lives down there. And every once in awhile, people will still refer to members of my family as "colored". In addition to what Jess said, it's also offensive because it was commonly used during the pre civil rights era. To call someone "colored" suggests to African Americans that they/we haven't made any progress. It reminds us of the "back of the bus" days. Most people of African descent in America today prefer to be called "African American".

There are many choice words for Native Americans too, and people have used some of these nasty words when referring to me; words such as "Prairie N*gger" and "Injun". Terrible words! Like I said, discrimination hurts. 

[Kelda]

Thanks David and Jess fopr explaining.... there really is some horrid peoplel in the world.

[David In Indy]

Thanks David and Jess fopr explaining.... there really is some horrid peoplel in the world.

You're quite welcome sweetie! Thanks for caring enough to ask! 

That's why I started this thread. Because people don't know, or they are afraid to ask. The only way we will ever understand each other is to talk about it.

Thanks Kelda!!