Author Topic: Let's Write Brokeback Sonnets!  (Read 10637 times)

Offline Lynne

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Let's Write Brokeback Sonnets!
« on: December 28, 2008, 12:02:14 am »
There is so much talent here at BetterMost - The Performance Thread, Limericks, The Twelve Days of Christmas, illustrated-style!

Can we try a thread where we write Brokeback Sonnets?  Please?  Pretty please??  ;)

From Wikipedia:

A Shakespearean sonnet consists of 14 lines, each line contains ten syllables, and each line is written in iambic pentameter in which a pattern of a non-emphasized syllable followed by an emphasized syllable is repeated five times. The rhyme scheme in a Shakespearean sonnet is ABAB CDCD EFEF GG, in which the last two lines are a rhyming couplet.

For example:

This example, Shakespeare's Sonnet 116, illustrates the form:

Let me not to the marriage of true minds (a)
Admit impediments, love is not love (b)
Which alters when it alteration finds, (a)
Or bends with the remover to remove. (b)
O no, it is an ever fixed mark (c)
That looks on tempests and is never shaken; (d)
It is the star to every wand'ring bark, (c)
Whose worth's unknown although his height be taken. (d)
Love's not time's fool, though rosy lips and cheeks (e)
Within his bending sickle's compass come, (f)
Love alters not with his brief hours and weeks, (e)
But bears it out even to the edge of doom: (f)
If this be error and upon me proved, (g)
I never writ, nor no man ever loved. (g)


I vote we help each other out with suggestions, etc...if we miss the mark, especially as we're getting started!
"Laß sein. Laß sein."

Offline Lynne

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Re: Let's Write Brokeback Sonnets!
« Reply #1 on: December 28, 2008, 12:06:08 am »
Up on Brokeback, alone, for one full moon
"Laß sein. Laß sein."

Offline Kerry

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Re: Let's Write Brokeback Sonnets!
« Reply #2 on: December 28, 2008, 01:21:26 am »

Up on Brokeback, alone, for one full moon
Where two cowboys once made sweet blissful love

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Offline Lynne

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Re: Let's Write Brokeback Sonnets!
« Reply #3 on: December 28, 2008, 01:30:47 am »
Up on Brokeback, alone, for one full moon
Where two cowboys once made sweet blissful love
Their time together ended much too soon
"Laß sein. Laß sein."

Offline Kerry

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Re: Let's Write Brokeback Sonnets!
« Reply #4 on: December 28, 2008, 01:45:17 am »

Up on Brokeback, alone, for one full moon
Where two cowboys once made sweet blissful love
Their time together ended much too soon
'Twixt passion's flame and fond cooing blithe dove



γνῶθι σεαυτόν

Offline ifyoucantfixit

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Re: Let's Write Brokeback Sonnets!
« Reply #5 on: December 28, 2008, 02:09:52 am »



Up on Brokeback, alone, for one full moon
Where two cowboys once made sweet blissful love
Their time together ended much too soon
'Twixt passion's flame and fond cooing blithe dove
Ne'er spoke o' loves true name or gave it sound.



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Offline Kerry

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Re: Let's Write Brokeback Sonnets!
« Reply #6 on: December 28, 2008, 02:48:06 am »

Up on Brokeback, alone, for one full moon
Where two cowboys once made sweet blissful love
Their time together ended much too soon
'Twixt passion's flame and fond cooing blithe dove
Ne'er spoke o' loves true name or gave it sound
For their love was true, as true it can be
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Offline Lynne

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Re: Let's Write Brokeback Sonnets!
« Reply #7 on: December 28, 2008, 03:23:44 am »
Up on Brokeback, alone, for one full moon
Where two cowboys once made sweet blissful love
Their time together ended much too soon
'Twixt passion's flame and fond cooing blithe dove
Ne'er spoke o' loves true name or gave it sound
For their love was true, as true it can be
And it was truly rare, the love they found
"Laß sein. Laß sein."

Offline ifyoucantfixit

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Re: Let's Write Brokeback Sonnets!
« Reply #8 on: December 28, 2008, 05:14:14 am »




Up on Brokeback, alone, for one full moon
Where two cowboys once made sweet blissful love
Their time together ended much too soon
'Twixt passion's flame and fond cooing blithe dove
Ne'er spoke o' loves true name or gave it sound
For their love was true, as true it can be
And it was truly rare, the love they found
After four years apart they finally could see,



     Beautiful mind

Offline Kerry

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Re: Let's Write Brokeback Sonnets!
« Reply #9 on: December 28, 2008, 08:40:18 am »
Up on Brokeback, alone, for one full moon
Where two cowboys once made sweet blissful love
Their time together ended much too soon
'Twixt passion's flame and fond cooing blithe dove
Ne'er spoke o' loves true name or gave it sound
For their love was true, as true it can be
And it was truly rare, the love they found
After four years apart they finally could see
True love's ecstasy was theirs sure enough
γνῶθι σεαυτόν

Offline ifyoucantfixit

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Re: Let's Write Brokeback Sonnets!
« Reply #10 on: December 28, 2008, 10:34:31 am »




Up on Brokeback, alone, for one full moon
Where two cowboys once made sweet blissful love
Their time together ended much too soon
'Twixt passion's flame and fond cooing blithe dove
Ne'er spoke o' loves true name or gave it sound
For their love was true, as true it can be
And it was truly rare, the love they found
After four years apart they finally could see
True love's ecstasy was theirs sure enough
They tendered the flames of campfire and heart



     Beautiful mind

Offline Lynne

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Re: Let's Write Brokeback Sonnets!
« Reply #11 on: December 28, 2008, 03:34:23 pm »
Up on Brokeback, alone, for one full moon
Where two cowboys once made sweet blissful love
Their time together ended much too soon
'Twixt passion's flame and fond cooing blithe dove
Ne'er spoke o' loves true name or gave it sound
For their love was true, as true it can be
And it was truly rare, the love they found
After Four years apart, they finally could see
True love's ecstasy was theirs sure enough
They tendered the flames of campfire and heart
Alone, apart was exceedingly rough


=aside=  Janice - I edited your line 8 slightly to make it fit this iambic pentameter stuff - 10 syllables!  This is hard.  Please don't hate me!  Change it some other way if you want to!  I just want to try it the 'right' way a time or two, see if we can do it!
 :-* --Lynne
"Laß sein. Laß sein."

Offline Kerry

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Re: Let's Write Brokeback Sonnets!
« Reply #12 on: December 28, 2008, 06:46:10 pm »
Up on Brokeback, alone, for one full moon
Where two cowboys once made sweet blissful love
Their time together ended much too soon
'Twixt passion's flame and fond cooing blithe dove
Ne'er spoke o' loves true name or gave it sound
For their love was true, as true it can be
And it was truly rare, the love they found
Four years apart, they finally could see
True love's ecstasy was theirs sure enough
They tendered the flames of campfire and heart
Alone, apart was exceedingly rough
Bitter sweet their love was, from end to start


γνῶθι σεαυτόν

Offline Ellemeno

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Re: Let's Write Brokeback Sonnets!
« Reply #13 on: December 28, 2008, 07:32:21 pm »
Up on Brokeback, alone, for one full moon
Where two cowboys once made sweet blissful love
Their time together ended much too soon
'Twixt passion's flame and fond cooing blithe dove
Ne'er spoke o' loves true name or gave it sound
For their love was true, as true it can be
And it was truly rare, the love they found
Four years apart, they finally could see
True love's ecstasy was theirs sure enough
They tendered the flames of campfire and heart
Alone, apart was exceedingly rough
Bitter sweet their love was, from end to start
Ne'er did a story cause one's heart to wrack

Offline Kerry

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Re: Let's Write Brokeback Sonnets!
« Reply #14 on: December 28, 2008, 10:41:37 pm »

Up on Brokeback, alone, for one full moon
Where two cowboys once made sweet blissful love
Their time together ended much too soon
'Twixt passion's flame and fond cooing blithe dove
Ne'er spoke o' loves true name or gave it sound
For their love was true, as true it can be
And it was truly rare, the love they found
Four years apart, they finally could see
True love's ecstasy was theirs sure enough
They tendered the flames of campfire and heart
Alone, apart was exceedingly rough
Bitter sweet their love was, from end to start
Ne'er did a story cause one's heart to wrack
Love Sublime, Jack and Ennis did not lack.
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Offline ifyoucantfixit

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Re: Let's Write Brokeback Sonnets!
« Reply #15 on: December 29, 2008, 12:19:12 am »



=aside=
Janice - I edited your line 8 slightly to make it fit this iambic pentameter stuff - 10 syllables!  This is hard.  Please don't hate me!  Change it some other way if you want to!  I just want to try it the 'right' way a time or two, see if we can do it!
 Kiss --Lynne

no worries,, Its just a game. :-\



     Beautiful mind

Offline Ellemeno

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Re: Let's Write Brokeback Sonnets!
« Reply #16 on: December 29, 2008, 05:50:10 am »
Lynne, can we do another one, please?

:)

With apologies to Elizabeth Barrett Browning for the first line:


How do I love Jack?  Let me count the ways.

Offline Kerry

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Re: Let's Write Brokeback Sonnets!
« Reply #17 on: December 29, 2008, 08:23:06 am »

How do I love Jack?  Let me count the ways.
His radiant countenance, so sublime
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Offline Lynne

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Re: Let's Write Brokeback Sonnets!
« Reply #18 on: December 29, 2008, 09:18:52 am »
How do I love Jack?  Let me count the ways.
His radiant countenance, so sublime
The depths of the seas at home in his gaze


Lynne, can we do another one, please?

:)

With apologies to Elizabeth Barrett Browning for the first line:


How do I love Jack?  Let me count the ways.

EBB would be honored!  ;)
"Laß sein. Laß sein."

Offline ifyoucantfixit

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Re: Let's Write Brokeback Sonnets!
« Reply #19 on: December 29, 2008, 06:02:11 pm »


How do I love Jack?  Let me count the ways.
His radiant countenance, so sublime
The depths of the seas at home in his gaze
To the height, breadth, and width my heart can climb.
« Last Edit: December 29, 2008, 06:53:52 pm by Lynne »



     Beautiful mind

Offline mariez

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Re: Let's Write Brokeback Sonnets!
« Reply #20 on: December 29, 2008, 07:54:50 pm »
What a great idea, Lynne!  (I'm not sure if I have this right, but I'll dip my toe in cautiously .....)


How do I love Jack?  Let me count the ways.
His radiant countenance, so sublime
The depths of the seas at home in his gaze
To the height, breadth, and width my heart can climb.
His lips so full, his hair like a raven
The measure of a country's greatness is its ability to retain compassion in times of crisis         ~~~~~~~~~Thurgood Marshall

The worst loneliness is not to be comfortable with yourself.    ~~~~~~~~~ Mark Twain

Offline Lynne

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Re: Let's Write Brokeback Sonnets!
« Reply #21 on: December 30, 2008, 09:12:02 pm »
What a great idea, Lynne!  (I'm not sure if I have this right, but I'll dip my toe in cautiously .....)

Thanks!  You got it!


How do I love Jack?  Let me count the ways.
His radiant countenance, so sublime
The depths of the seas at home in his gaze
To the height, breadth, and width my heart can climb.
His lips so full, his hair like a raven
Clumsy, awkward, yet in glorious in youth
"Laß sein. Laß sein."

Offline Kerry

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Re: Let's Write Brokeback Sonnets!
« Reply #22 on: December 30, 2008, 10:39:26 pm »
How do I love Jack?  Let me count the ways.
His radiant countenance, so sublime
The depths of the seas at home in his gaze
To the height, breadth, and width my heart can climb.
His lips so full, his hair like a raven
Clumsy, awkward, yet in glorious in youth
His strong embrace provides a safe haven
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Offline ifyoucantfixit

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Re: Let's Write Brokeback Sonnets!
« Reply #23 on: December 30, 2008, 11:34:59 pm »



How do I love Jack?  Let me count the ways.
His radiant countenance, so sublime
The depths of the seas at home in his gaze
To the height, breadth, and width my heart can climb.
His lips so full, his hair like a raven
Clumsy, awkward, yet in glorious in youth
His strong embrace provides a safe haven
We were spied on by such hidden uncouth



     Beautiful mind

Offline SuperDistortion

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Re: Let's Write Brokeback Sonnets!
« Reply #24 on: August 25, 2010, 05:13:17 pm »
How do I love Jack?  Let me count the ways.
His radiant countenance, so sublime
The depths of the seas at home in his gaze
To the height, breadth, and width my heart can climb.
His lips so full, his hair like a raven
Clumsy, awkward, yet in glorious in youth
His strong embrace provides a safe haven
We were spied on by such hidden uncouth
There, frustration so intense dare we look
"Really, it's not mine..."   --- Austin Powers