Author Topic: BetterMost member LoneLeeB3 has passed away. Our grieving thread.  (Read 86815 times)

Offline David In Indy

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Re: BetterMost member LoneLeeB3 passes away.
« Reply #710 on: August 16, 2010, 01:32:32 am »
I have been thinking about Richard every single day since this whole awful ordeal happened. And it's weird - but weird in a very good way - because even though I never met Rich in person I can feel his presence here from time to time. Almost as if he's watching over me. Do any of you sense this too? Or is it just my imagination?

I still have those cards he mailed me sitting right here next to my computer. I got them out the minute I learned he was in hospital and on life support. I can't seem to put them back in the drawer. I feel better with them sitting here next to me.

Anyway, yeah Mandy, it's been a long two weeks. For all of us, I suspect.
Dogs have owners. Cats have staff.

Offline Penthesilea

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Re: BetterMost member LoneLeeB3 passes away.
« Reply #711 on: August 16, 2010, 02:12:45 am »
I have been thinking about Richard every single day since this whole awful ordeal happened. And it's weird - but weird in a very good way - because even though I never met Rich in person I can feel his presence here from time to time. Almost as if he's watching over me. Do any of you sense this too? Or is it just my imagination?

I still have those cards he mailed me sitting right here next to my computer. I got them out the minute I learned he was in hospital and on life support. I can't seem to put them back in the drawer. I feel better with them sitting here next to me.

Anyway, yeah Mandy, it's been a long two weeks. For all of us, I suspect.


(((David)))


I just reread some pages of Rich's blog :'( and wanted to repost a picture I came across:





Rich posted it on his two years anniversary on BM. He posted some memories of those two years.

Offline Penthesilea

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Re: BetterMost member LoneLeeB3 passes away.
« Reply #712 on: August 16, 2010, 02:21:00 am »
About a month later, Rich talked about Gene for the first time on BM. I just reread our reactions, how happy we all were for him.
 
And Truman posted these words we all know:

Go to sleep, may your sweet dreams come true
Just lay back in my arms for one more night
I've this crazy old notion that calls me sometimes
Saying this one's the love of our lives.

Cause I know a love that will never grow old
And I know a love that will never grow old.

When you wake up the world may have changed
But trust in me, I'll never falter or fail
Just the smile in your eyes, it can light up the night,
And your laughter's like wind in my sails.

Lean on me, let our hearts beat in time,
Feel strength from the hands that have held you so long.
Who cares where we go on this rutted old road
In a world that may say that we're wrong.


Offline Ellemeno

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Re: BetterMost member LoneLeeB3 passes away.
« Reply #713 on: August 16, 2010, 04:41:10 am »
That's a bee-you-tee-ful picture of bee-you-tee-ful people.  


Offline Ellemeno

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Re: The Dead Letter Office
« Reply #714 on: August 16, 2010, 05:41:41 am »
I haven't known where to post this, so I'll do it here - the last thing Rich posted on facebook, he found on my facebook page, and he did it the morning of the accident.  It's a link to a little essay called, "How to really love a child."  I got it from my friend Heather Kennedy, and Rich got it from me.

http://www.facebook.com/note.php?note_id=424957885853&id=1318778270&ref=mf



How to really love a child


Be there.

Say yes as often as possible.

Let them bang on pots and pans.

If they’re crabby, put them in water.

If they’re unlovable, love yourself.

Realize how important it is to be a child.

Go to a movie theater in your pajamas.

Read books out loud with joy.

Invent pleasures together.

Remember how really small they are.

Giggle a lot.

Surprise them.

Say no when necessary.

Teach feelings.

Heal your own inner child.

Learn about parenting.

Hug trees together.

Make loving safe.

Bake a cake and eat it with no hands.

Go find elephants and kiss them.

Plan to build a rocket ship.

Imagine yourself magic.

Make lots of forts with blankets.

Let your angel fly.

Reveal your own dreams.

Search out the positive.

Keep the gleam in your eye.

Encourage silly.

Plant licorice in your garden.

Open up.

Stop yelling.

Express your love.

A lot.

Speak kindly.

Paint their tennis shoes.

Handle with caring.

CHILDREN ARE MIRACULOUS

(source: SARK http://www.planetsark.com/eshop_products_posters_feat_02.htm)
« Last Edit: August 16, 2010, 12:34:26 pm by Ellemeno »

Offline CellarDweller

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Re: BetterMost member LoneLeeB3 passes away.
« Reply #715 on: August 16, 2010, 06:08:21 am »
Not a day goes by where I don't think of my big brother.

I still have his number in my phone, and email address in my contact list.

I don't know why this happened, but I'm grateful for the time I had with Rich, the phonecalls and emails we had, and the visits that happened where I got to hold him.


Tell him when l come up to him and ask to play the record, l'm gonna say: ''Voulez-vous jouer ce disque?''
'Voulez-vous, will you kiss my dick?'
Will you play my record? One-track mind!

Offline Lynne

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Re: BetterMost member LoneLeeB3 passes away.
« Reply #716 on: August 16, 2010, 07:50:07 am »
(((((Chuck)))))

I still have a Linked In invite from Rich that was awaiting response from me.  I hardly ever go there, been in my box for weeks. And no, he won't be coming out of my Blackberry either.
« Last Edit: August 16, 2010, 09:14:57 am by Lynne »
"Laß sein. Laß sein."

Offline SFEnnisSF

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Re: BetterMost member LoneLeeB3 passes away.
« Reply #717 on: August 16, 2010, 05:51:41 pm »
I can't delete him out of my phone either.  No way...

Offline bizzysmom

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Re: BetterMost member LoneLeeB3 passes away.
« Reply #718 on: August 16, 2010, 07:12:34 pm »
I can't stop thinking about him either - laughing, crying, getting really angry, etc....  I sit at work and I'm just a shell.  Mentally, my mind isn't at work.  We both agreed to raise our daughter together.  I would call him when Elizabeth would push my buttons and he would get on the phone and let her have it - he backed me up when he heard her sassing me, etc...  She is about to hit her teen years and I'm scared.... For 17 years, we talked  every day -  for the past 3 years, at least 4-5 times a week - it's been two weeks and it hits me more and more that I can't hear him.  I have to hide to breakdown since Elizabeth is handling it different...she knows every way is right but she chooses to remember his laugh.  I will follow suit (in front of her).  A part of my heart died with him-I have never felt like this before and am not sure how to handle  it.

I would love to share with you the pictures of Richard that I have -  It's from a different time in his life though. 

Is that appropriate?

Offline southendmd

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Re: BetterMost member LoneLeeB3 passes away.
« Reply #719 on: August 16, 2010, 07:34:00 pm »
Oh, Marcia, of course it's appropriate.  We would love to see your pictures of Richard.  We know he wasn't born yesterday! 

In fact, I really enjoyed seeing the photos at the service of you and him before we all knew him.  (His weight yo-yoed just like some of us....)

By the way, don't be surprised if Elizabeth's reaction changes over time; she may be defending against her sadness, and it could come out in mysterious ways.