Author Topic: *HAPPY BROKIEDAY TO ME* Tell us about yours. The date, who you saw it withetc.  (Read 21394 times)

Offline ifyoucantfixit

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  I am so happy to see others putting their words up here.  It is a long time for me and so little time for others.  It is wonderful to see how six years running it is still so relevant to everyone.  I posted on twitter, or facebook, i'm not sure now to Bay City John.. He doesn't go by that anymore, but you know who I mean.  I asked him if he could believe how it is still being so much a part of our lives this long afterwards.  He sent back, "you bet."  That is just how it has became such an integral part of our lives.  Every word, every phrase and all the music, is so much a part of us now.  We recognize it in everything we see and hear, that even brings back any part of that memory.  I specially want to tell KittyKat, that she is only at the beginning of what will probablly be a life changing experience.  My own family thought that I was literally losing my grip afterwards.  I was so uncharachteristically crying and sobbing at the oddest times. 
 
 "Truth is," it made me realize something that I never had known before.  I had hints and all kinds of clues, but I was too dense to "get a clue."  When I look back now, it was there all the time.  I just couldn't get it.  My brother was one of those people that were so ashamed of his true self, that he spent the last 20 years of his life, trying to overcome it.  He spent thousands and thousands of dollars.  Tried once unsuccesfully and finally successfully to commit suicide.  He even asked me "if I thought that gay people were born that way, or were they choosing to be that?" It was an offhanded question when he asked it of me, so I didn't have any idea he was asking me about it as a personal issue.
 
  We had always been each others best friend.  We discussed every single thing about all aspects of our life.  I could not believe that he didn't just tell me that he was gay.  I was at his therapists office with him one time.  The therapist asked to speak to me.  I went in and we talked about him and how I felt about him.  He asked me outirght if Weldon could do anything that would make me disapprove of him or not love him?   I told him "of course not."  "I would love him and stick by him no matter what he did."  The Dr. then turned to him and said.  "See she said she would love you no matter what."  My brother didn't say anything else, he just looked like he doubted what was being said, and no more was said about it.  These two events were a while apart, so I never really made the connection.  It was later after I saw this movie, that it all hit me like a bolt of lightning.  That was what had been going on with my own brother.  He was at least as convected as Ennis.  He died without ever telling me the truth.  I had to find it out through a movie.  I think about all the horrible lonely times he spent. All of the endless telephone calls we had where I was trying for all my life to elevate his attitude.  Then later on to try to will him to live.  How afraid he was to be himself.  I hope for every person in this entire world, that they have the ability to "come out," to those that they know care about them.  It will be such a great coming together for them both.  I don't care if they are religiously condemned, or ostracized by any other people.  If they know that some person loves and cares for them that much.  They would accept them however they are.  I know that this movie has singlehandedly had a great deal to do with the acceptance we are now seeing in society.  We are mostly, except for the bible thumping bigots,  knowing that it is a thing that people are born with.  Not a choice.  Even though it is how I used to think about it.  I admit to having that opinion.  I was not condemning of them, I just thought that they were chosing to be that way for whatever reason they came to that choice.  Be it, that they did not have luck with the opposite sex.  Or if they were only influenced by other people of the same sex talking them into it.  I admit.  I was stupid in so many ways about it.  I know this too.  I was not the only one that knew so little either.  Science is more and more probing and proving the existance of pre birth causes for the change in hormones, or brain chemestry.  It is going to be rock solid in the future, I am sure.  I just wish it would hurry up.  That way the stupid bigots, would have no excuse for all of the ridiculous remarks and blocks that they put in the laws and societal behaviors. 
 
 All in all, I think that this movie has effected so many people, in a very positive way.  Of course it is a remarkable piece of art, and film making.  It is unsurpassed in its simplicity, and wonderful prose.  The accompaning music that fits so perfectly.  The wonder of the vistas and the genius and very minimalistic sets.  They came together to make a stunning complete.  I love it, and will never forgive, the Academ of Motion Picture Arts and Sciences for not giving it the prize.  The real insult, was when they gave it to a movie that was so trite, and predictable and boring, that I could not even watch it all the way through.  I tried two times.  It was fruitless.  I never made it. 
 
 Oh well, I do have the knowledge that they realized too late, the gigantic mistake that they made.  Even though it could not be undone, the show was over for that.  They did place it on the poster as if it was the winner later.  That was somewhat helpful.  Not ever will it be the same as if it had won the way it was entitled to. 
       
                                                             Thanks for listening to my tyrade.  I hope it wasn't too hard to deal with.

   I noticed after writing this and rereading it for errors.  How many of the places that I had used the vernacular in my own writing.  I didn't realize it until then.  It was not intentional. 
« Last Edit: January 16, 2012, 08:48:11 am by ifyoucantfixit »



     Beautiful mind

Offline Katie77

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I read your post Janice and feel an overwhelming sadness and also an empathy with you on watching the movie, when you say, "Truth is it made me realize something that I never had known before" (you will see, I used a similar phrase in my post)....so I know the feelings you felt, the frustration that it was too late, and the uncanny resemblance to the life of someone you loved.

What a learning path this movie was for you, as it was for me, I do know how you were feeling, and I also know, how by joining a forum like this, our education on the gay community has made us better people.

I am so sorry for the loss of your brother, my father too, committed suicide, so I know the different kinds of grief you go through when this happens.

I have no doubt how the movie has changed your life forever, as it has mine. Its like in some way, it answered our questions from the past, made us understand things that happened then, and made us wiser and braver to better understand the life of those loved ones that are gone.

Thank you for sharing your story.
Being happy doesn't mean everything is perfect.

It means you've decided to see beyond the imperfection

Offline KittyKat

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Thank You Katie and ifyoucan'tfixit for the welcome. I'm so glad I found this site.  Sorry to read about your losses. 
Glad You Forgot Your Harmonica

Offline Penthesilea

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I first saw Brokeback Mountain last week on HBO. Seriously. 01/12 was the first time. It was late, I could not sleep and nothing else was on.
This is the best movie ever made. It's simplicity is overwhelming. The love between Jack and Ennis is so beautiful and natural.
I can't stop trembling.


Welcome to BetterMost, KittyKat!
Lovely avatar pic. :)



Offline Front-Ranger

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Thanks Sason. Just coffee for me thanks.

You can't take no cake right now?  ;)
Too much to do. . .I don't have time to get old!

Offline tampatalon

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I have my tickets framed;
Starlight 20 Muvico Theater Tampa Florida
605 PM Sunday December 2, 2006
Auditorium 7

And the rest is history.

Steve
"Lean on me, Let our hearts beat in time, Feel strength from the hands that have held you so long. Who cares where we go on this rutted old road, In a world that may say that we're wrong."--EmmyLou Harris

Offline Front-Ranger

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Saturday, January 7, 2006 was the day I first saw the movie Brokeback Mountain. My daughter gave the tickets to me as a Christmas present and we also went to the Dushanbe Teahouse for dinner beforehand. I still remember the surreal feeling as we all left the theater after seeing the movie. It was a sellout and there was a big crowd but we were all hushed and looking around at each other as if to say, This is a remarkable experience that we have all had together. Or, like Ennis and Jack would say, this ain't no little thing. And, seven years later, we can all agree that they were right!
Too much to do. . .I don't have time to get old!

Offline Penthesilea

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Happy Brokieday, Lee! :D

Offline Front-Ranger

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Thank you, friend!

Also, January 5, 2007 was another major milestone for me. It was the date that EDelMar and I embarked upon our first visit to Wyoming, the Big Horn Mountains, and our first trip to Brokenback!
Too much to do. . .I don't have time to get old!

Offline Sason

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Happy Brokieversary, Lee!

Düva pööp is a förce of natüre