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BetterMost, Wyoming & Brokeback Mountain Forum  |  Our BetterMost Community  |  BetterMost People (Moderators: Kelda, Kerry)  |  Topic: On Caregiving 0 Residents and 1 Guest are viewing this topic. « previous next »
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Author Topic: On Caregiving  (Read 59442 times)
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« Reply #230 on: August 19, 2017, 11:58:56 am »

That sounds very upsetting, Lee. I hope she's feeling better now.  Undecided
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« Reply #231 on: August 19, 2017, 12:12:24 pm »

At the beginning of her dementia, my mother was still very fit and loved to hike. ... Assisted living wasn't an option because she managed to escape the closed ward (by climbing like a cat onto a shed, into a tree and down the tree on the other side of the fence!).

Wow, that's really impressive!

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The facility was a former castle with gardens that was closed off (with high fences and walls, no trees close to the fence Grin) to the outside, but totally open once you're in. People could stroll around in the gardens or courtyard and several main and side buildings. There were also lots of different activities and my mother was even able to go on a hiking vacation in Italy with a group. They also had a ward for people with high dependence. So while they didn't take in people with a high need of bodily care to begin with, they also didn't have to kick out people once they got older/more dependent.

That sounds idyllic. Is it still there? What's its name? I just received a writing assignment from a website that looks at big issues from a global perspective. The part I'm working on has to do with aging. This piece will be a more general, overall examination of the issue. But if I ever write about "places that have found great housing solutions for aging people" or something, I'd look into it!

I wonder if other European castles have been repurposed this way. Don't many/most of them have high walls around them? Seems like a great solution.

I'm reading Being Mortal by Atul Gawande, the New Yorker writer/successful doctor/critic of unhelpful American medical practices. It's kind of a depressing book, frankly. But he found a few homes sort of like that -- not in castles, but places that let their residents remain as independent as possible and make their own choices, even if the choices aren't necessarily the safest or most healthy. His point is that the U.S. medical system is trained to prioritize safety and longevity, whatever that might entail, over older people's happiness and contentedness with their lives.


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« Reply #232 on: August 19, 2017, 03:03:42 pm »

As if on cue, Mom has had an emergency starting last night. She began upchucking about midnight and continued throughout the morning. I arrived at 12:25 to sit with her at lunch and found her in her bed, sleeping. I got the update...nobody called me. I went back at supper time. She was up in her wheelchair, but very weak. Later, she began vomiting again. A lot of green stuff. It reminded me of when my cat eats grass and then. . . . The staff came in about 6 pm and said, well maybe her diet needs to be changed. But these things lead to a huge change in mental and physical capacity. I'm kicking myself for going to a book shop event last night instead of supervising her eating.


No one called you when this was happening?
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« Reply #233 on: August 20, 2017, 06:20:55 pm »

No, nobody called. The patients have so many problems all the time, and the nurses just don't call you unless they are at death's door.  Cry
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« Reply #234 on: August 20, 2017, 09:44:56 pm »

Ugh.....that's just sad.
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Tell him when l come up to him and ask to play the record, l'm gonna say: ''Voulez-vous jouer ce disque?''
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« Reply #235 on: August 21, 2017, 09:33:00 am »

No, nobody called. The patients have so many problems all the time, and the nurses just don't call you unless they are at death's door.  Cry

What about if they fall?

I had a coworker whose mother was in a home. Every time she fell, my coworker got a phone call.

I presume that protected the home from charges of abuse, but, still, that seems a wise policy to me.
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« Reply #236 on: August 21, 2017, 06:16:47 pm »

 my mom would get a call if my grandmother fell.   After two falls, she was given a weird contraption to wheel around in, it looked to be made out of pvc pipes.





Gram was able to sit in in, and because it was pvc, it was very light, so she was able to scoot around in it using her feet.
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Tell him when l come up to him and ask to play the record, l'm gonna say: ''Voulez-vous jouer ce disque?''
'Voulez-vous, will you kiss my dick?'
Will you play my record? One-track mind!
Jeff Wrangler
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« Reply #237 on: August 22, 2017, 09:58:21 am »

my mom would get a call if my grandmother fell.   After two falls, she was given a weird contraption to wheel around in, it looked to be made out of pvc pipes.





Gram was able to sit in in, and because it was pvc, it was very light, so she was able to scoot around in it using her feet.

A "walker" for adults.

(Do they still have them for kids?)
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"It is required of every man that the spirit within him should walk abroad among his fellow-men, and travel far and wide."--Charles Dickens.
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« Reply #238 on: August 22, 2017, 05:43:33 pm »

I'm  sure they do!
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Tell him when l come up to him and ask to play the record, l'm gonna say: ''Voulez-vous jouer ce disque?''
'Voulez-vous, will you kiss my dick?'
Will you play my record? One-track mind!
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« Reply #239 on: August 23, 2017, 09:45:58 am »

I'm not sure whether to post this here or the "In the New Yorker" thread, but I'm finishing NYer writer/surgeon Atul Guwande's Being Mortal, and it's excellent, especially good for caregivers.


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BetterMost, Wyoming & Brokeback Mountain Forum  |  Our BetterMost Community  |  BetterMost People (Moderators: Kelda, Kerry)  |  Topic: On Caregiving « previous next »
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