Author Topic: For Our New Members: Brokeback Mountain Stages of Grief & Acceptance  (Read 48751 times)

Offline Faye92

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Re: For Our New Members: Brokeback Mountain Stages of Grief & Acceptance
« Reply #40 on: December 19, 2006, 09:17:44 pm »
Thank you so much Lynne and you had a good point about the homophobia that had been planted into Ennis' mind. That is the saddest part of all and I suppose for me, I believe in taking risks when it comes to love no matter what, hence my frustration with Ennis. I would have told him to just be who you are and love 'cause in the end, that's all that really matters. But he couldn't get past those fears and who could blame him with all that he had heard and seen as a little boy. Initailly, I felt sorry for Jack, whose personality I identify with the most, but now I am beginning to understand what Ennis may have felt.

When I first saw this film, I was so mad with Ennis and those that saw the world as he did and had little understanding of him but as I search, listen and learn, perhaps there is much more to Ennis. We all behave the way that we do for a reason and no doubt, Ennis acted as a result of that. Now I'm finding myself wanting to know even more about Ennis.

I'm looking forward to reading the short novel after the New Year!!

Offline HerrKaiser

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Re: For Our New Members: Brokeback Mountain Stages of Grief & Acceptance
« Reply #41 on: January 04, 2007, 08:03:15 pm »
Thank you so much Lynne and you had a good point about the homophobia that had been planted into Ennis' mind. That is the saddest part of all and I suppose for me, I believe in taking risks when it comes to love no matter what, hence my frustration with Ennis. I would have told him to just be who you are and love 'cause in the end, that's all that really matters. But he couldn't get past those fears and who could blame him with all that he had heard and seen as a little boy. Initailly, I felt sorry for Jack, whose personality I identify with the most, but now I am beginning to understand what Ennis may have felt.

When I first saw this film, I was so mad with Ennis and those that saw the world as he did and had little understanding of him but as I search, listen and learn, perhaps there is much more to Ennis. We all behave the way that we do for a reason and no doubt, Ennis acted as a result of that. Now I'm finding myself wanting to know even more about Ennis.

I'm looking forward to reading the short novel after the New Year!!

Interesting feelings about Ennis; conversely I find Ennis to be the main, if not the single, captivating aspect of the film. It is his view of the world which is ever so endearing in every way. His near complete inwardness shrouded by a personal sense of responsibilty and clear desire to be all he can be within the bounds he believes he has makes him ivery attractive. The way he approached his life and situation makes the story/film. Had he pursued his life as you would have recommended him to do...not only would the story be one that is "typical" by today's standards (and hence not very provacative), Ennis as a character would fall into a mold. Ennis, for many men, is an affirmation of life and a realization that pleasure, happiness, comfort with another human is acheiveable in spite of choosing to get there on a road less easy and stay on that road. I believe Ennis obtained more love and a lasting, life-long, true "partnership" with Jake that not many other men, even in a openly gay lifestyle, are able to attain. Nothing sad or regretful about that. Ennis is all man; he's Jakes hero, and Ennis' promise to Jake at the end epitomizes Ennis' utter and complete commitment to himself and Jake.

Offline Katie77

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Re: For Our New Members: Brokeback Mountain Stages of Grief & Acceptance
« Reply #42 on: January 05, 2007, 02:23:04 am »
Ennis, for many men, is an affirmation of life and a realization that pleasure, happiness, comfort with another human is acheiveable in spite of choosing to get there on a road less easy and stay on that road. I believe Ennis obtained more love and a lasting, life-long, true "partnership" with Jake that not many other men, even in a openly gay lifestyle, are able to attain. Nothing sad or regretful about that. Ennis is all man; he's Jakes hero, and Ennis' promise to Jake at the end epitomizes Ennis' utter and complete commitment to himself and Jake.

What a wonderful way to describe the character of Ennis and the love and "partnership" he had with Jack.....certainly takes away a lot of the sadness that a lot of us feel for Ennis, and gives his character a special strength.

Gees, I thought I knew this friend of mine so well, then I read your post, and I see him in a better,happier, stronger role, and realize how much he definately received from his relationship with Jack.
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Offline Ladyeve

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Re: For Our New Members: Brokeback Mountain Stages of Grief & Acceptance
« Reply #43 on: January 27, 2007, 11:39:26 pm »


When I first saw this film, I had no love for Ennis, (to be honest) for a long time.  He fought Jack at every turn, to be more committed to this relationship that lasted for twenty years.   Jack's commitment  to him was there, but Ennis was so fearful, and this is man who would fight at a drop of a hat.  But yet couldn't or wouldn't fight for the love he had for Jack.  I said "this  just doesn't make sense"   Jack was the one I admired, he was out there, and knew who he was, and what he wanted, and he wanted Ennis.   Jack went through all the things that Ennis feared, the put down from Aguirre when he went back to work for him,  the rodeo clown's rejection when  he tried to come on to him.  He went through all that, and Ennis just thought people were talking about him.  But Jack kept on with life, even with the pain.  Maybe I can have a better understanding of Ennis, I want to,  but I couldn't help feel Ennis was a coward, and didn't appreciate Jack's love and commitment to him until after his death.



Offline Front-Ranger

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Re: For Our New Members: Brokeback Mountain Stages of Grief & Acceptance
« Reply #44 on: January 28, 2007, 11:25:48 pm »
Still...think of how far Ennis came in his personal journey from where he started...a child subject to a terrifying vision and a tyrannical father, a brother who beat him up constantly, siblings who rejected him, abandoned by his parents, his siblings, and even his truck (the transmission went out, so he had to drop out of school).

When you see the smiley face in the sky, the pandemic will be over!

Offline nakymaton

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Re: For Our New Members: Brokeback Mountain Stages of Grief & Acceptance
« Reply #45 on: January 28, 2007, 11:27:25 pm »
Still...think of how far Ennis came in his personal journey from where he started...a child subject to a terrifying vision and a tyrannical father, a brother who beat him up constantly, siblings who rejected him, abandoned by his parents, his siblings, and even his truck (the transmission went out, so he had to drop out of school).

Ok. Now you've gone and reminded me of the joke about what happens when you play country music backwards.
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Offline Katie77

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Re: For Our New Members: Brokeback Mountain Stages of Grief & Acceptance
« Reply #46 on: January 28, 2007, 11:29:16 pm »
tell us the joke!!
Being happy doesn't mean everything is perfect.

It means you've decided to see beyond the imperfection

Offline nakymaton

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Re: For Our New Members: Brokeback Mountain Stages of Grief & Acceptance
« Reply #47 on: January 28, 2007, 11:33:50 pm »
What happens when you play country music backwards?

You get your job back, you get your wife back, your truck starts running again, and your dog comes back to life.

(I hope this makes sense to people who didn't spend their childhood trying to play records backwards to decode the secret Satanic messages!)
Watch out. That poster has a low startle point.

Offline Front-Ranger

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Re: For Our New Members: Brokeback Mountain Stages of Grief & Acceptance
« Reply #48 on: January 28, 2007, 11:36:04 pm »
Yes, it does!!

 :D :D :D :D :D
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Offline HerrKaiser

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Re: For Our New Members: Brokeback Mountain Stages of Grief & Acceptance
« Reply #49 on: January 30, 2007, 11:29:08 pm »

When I first saw this film, I had no love for Ennis, (to be honest) for a long time.  He fought Jack at every turn, to be more committed to this relationship that lasted for twenty years.   Jack's commitment  to him was there, but Ennis was so fearful, and this is man who would fight at a drop of a hat.  But yet couldn't or wouldn't fight for the love he had for Jack.  I said "this  just doesn't make sense"   Jack was the one I admired, he was out there, and knew who he was, and what he wanted, and he wanted Ennis.   Jack went through all the things that Ennis feared, the put down from Aguirre when he went back to work for him,  the rodeo clown's rejection when  he tried to come on to him.  He went through all that, and Ennis just thought people were talking about him.  But Jack kept on with life, even with the pain.  Maybe I can have a better understanding of Ennis, I want to,  but I couldn't help feel Ennis was a coward, and didn't appreciate Jack's love and commitment to him until after his death.


It seems that your evaluation of Ennis, like so many, is negative and exemplory of the desire to judge him basis contemporary measurements and 'what one might do today'. I think, conversely, that Ennis was far from coward status; unless one knows what it is to be bisexual or homosexual in the 1960s where Ennis was, one cannot imagine the need to put up a front. Regardless of one's opinion of 'what i would do', sheltering oneself from harm's way is not a sign of cowardice. Closeted behavior is not cowardice; rather it's a chosen lifestyle that works within a framework, sometimes comfortable, sometimes not very comfortable.

And, I do not think Ennis fought against Jack. Ennis was far more realistic; he accepted the responsibility of marriage for himself AND Jack (Jack would have walked from his wife and young child), he managed to meet with Jack under far greater difficulties than Jack had, he, apparently, was committed and faithful during their years together while Jack used the excuse of 'having to have more than 3-4 high altitude...". Jack, to me, put sex above his emotional commitment to Ennis more than once, particularly in the end. Ennis was the pillar of strength, the real man, the source of strength and solidarity, and voice of reason in an unreasonable situation.

I am also not sure Jack was "out there" and deserves great amounts of admiration for "knowing who he was". If so, why did he marry and have a child? Very selfish, indeed, if he was focused on Ennis.

both men sought safety zones within which to live and cope with their feelings; each was slightly different but not worlds apart. Ennis to me, however, is a tower of greatness in terms of how he tried to please, kept on giving, remained uncomplaining, and loved and appreciated the blessings he had. His line when he and jack were stream-side after their reunion "...I'm sending up a prayer of thanks...". He was grateful for what he had; he did not measure his joy, success, and love for what he did not have. There's a man who I'd stand in line to shake his hand.