Author Topic: Kerry's Komedy Klub  (Read 1200468 times)

Offline David In Indy

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Re: Kerry's Komedy Klub
« Reply #210 on: March 17, 2007, 01:01:50 am »
 

 :laugh:  :laugh:

Drink Ovaltine and you'll feel gay. lol

If you think about it hard enough, ... well never mind!  :-\

My Grandma used to tell me she "felt gay" in the morning. Funny how things change, isn't it?
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Offline Kerry

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Re: Kerry's Komedy Klub
« Reply #211 on: March 17, 2007, 01:32:54 am »
I saw this on a washroom wall at a truck stop on Highway 401,near Port Hope, Ontario a few years back:

My mother made me a homosexual!


Below in another handwriting:

If I left her the wool, would she make me one too?   :laugh:

Gee, it's a small world, Dottie. Many years ago, when I was a child, I went on a picnic with my family. That very same message was written on the back of the cubicle door, in the picnic ground toilet. I would have been about 12 or so at the time. I gave my Mum a hard time about it, demanding an explanation. Poor ol' Mum. This happened in Sydney, Australia. Which is probably a looong way from you, Dottie! On a different family picnic, I remember my Mum laughing as she left the Ladies. She said someone had written, "Smile, you're on candid camera!" on the back of the cubicle door.  :laugh: 
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Offline Kerry

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Re: Kerry's Komedy Klub
« Reply #212 on: March 17, 2007, 01:37:21 am »
:laugh:  :laugh:

Drink Ovaltine and you'll feel gay. lol

If you think about it hard enough, ... well never mind!  :-\

My Grandma used to tell me she "felt gay" in the morning. Funny how things change, isn't it?

Here's another funny use of the "G" word, David. It probably explains why I've always been attracted to sailors!!!  :laugh:

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Offline David In Indy

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Re: Kerry's Komedy Klub
« Reply #213 on: March 17, 2007, 02:30:09 am »
Here's another funny use of the "G" word, David. It probably explains why I've always been attracted to sailors!!!  :laugh:


I have an attraction to sailors too Kerry!

Maybe it's from all that Ovaltine!  :D
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Offline Kerry

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Re: Kerry's Komedy Klub
« Reply #214 on: March 21, 2007, 06:29:15 pm »

A wealthy old lady decides to go on a photo safari in Africa , taking her faithful aged poodle named Cuddles, along for the company.

One day the poodle starts chasing butterflies and before long, Cuddles discovers that he's lost. Wandering about, he notices a leopard heading rapidly in his direction with the intention of having lunch.
             
The old poodle thinks, "Oh, oh! I'm in deep doo-doo now!" Noticing some bones on the ground close by, he immediately settles down to chew on the bones with his back to the approaching cat. Just as the leopard is about to leap the old poodle exclaims loudly, "Boy, that was one delicious leopard! I wonder if there are any more around here?"

Hearing this, the young leopard halts his attack in mid-strike, a look of terror comes over him and he slinks away into the trees. "Phew!", says the leopard, "That was close! That old poodle nearly had me!"

Meanwhile, a monkey who had been watching the whole scene from a nearby tree, figures he can put this knowledge to good use and trade it for protection from the leopard. So off he goes, but the old poodle sees him heading after the leopard with great speed, and figures that something must be up. The  monkey  soon catches up with the leopard, spills the beans and strikes a deal for himself with the leopard.

The young leopard is furious at being made a fool of and says, "Here, monkey, hop on my back and see what's going to happen to that conniving canine!"

Now, the old poodle sees the leopard coming with the monkey on his back and thinks, "What am I going to do now?", but instead of running, the dog sits down with his back to his attackers, pretending he hasn't seen them yet, and just when they get close enough to hear, the old poodle says.

"Where's that damn monkey? I sent him off an hour ago to bring me another leopard!"

Moral of this story . . .  age and treachery will always overcome youth and skill!   :laugh:
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Offline dot-matrix

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Re: Kerry's Komedy Klub
« Reply #215 on: March 22, 2007, 02:45:26 am »
Life is not a dress rehearsal

Offline dot-matrix

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Re: Kerry's Komedy Klub
« Reply #216 on: March 22, 2007, 02:46:36 am »
Life is not a dress rehearsal

Offline dot-matrix

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Re: Kerry's Komedy Klub
« Reply #217 on: March 22, 2007, 02:52:44 am »
Life is not a dress rehearsal

Offline dot-matrix

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Re: Kerry's Komedy Klub
« Reply #218 on: March 22, 2007, 02:53:47 am »
Life is not a dress rehearsal

Offline dot-matrix

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Re: Kerry's Komedy Klub
« Reply #219 on: March 23, 2007, 02:28:00 am »
Need Pills  ???

A middle-aged guy went to his doctor and asked for a prescription of the strongest Viagra available because he had got two young nymphomaniacs staying at his house for a few days.

Later that week he went back to the doctor and asked for painkillers. "What's the problem?" asked the doctor. "Is your penis in that much pain?"

"No," said the guy. "It's for my wrists, the girls never showed up."  ::)
Life is not a dress rehearsal