Author Topic: The Bettermost Drabblefest: Please Join In!  (Read 1204681 times)

Offline ifyoucantfixit

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Re: The Bettermost Drabblefest: Please Join In!
« Reply #1520 on: June 22, 2007, 01:22:13 am »



          I really like this story.  It is progressing at a realistic pace..His heart and libido is out pulling his
fear, and anxiety.  He is trying very hard to handle them all..            good job.        janice



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Offline Lumière

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Re: The Bettermost Drabblefest: Please Join In!
« Reply #1521 on: June 22, 2007, 01:37:23 am »

                Happy birthday to our dear lucise (Milli)  Heres hoping you have many many more.
                              You definately make the world a brighter place to be.
                                                                                                        your friend and admirer
                                                                                                                Janice

Thanks so much Janice!   :-*


After the Visit

I so loved this Marl! Wow.  :)   Thank you for that!


Offline Cameron

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Re: The Bettermost Drabblefest: Please Join In!
« Reply #1522 on: June 22, 2007, 05:53:42 am »
Thank you so, so much, Merrily, Janice and Millie!!! :)
 
Marl

 


« Last Edit: June 22, 2007, 06:02:54 am by Cameron »



Offline MaineWriter

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Re: The Bettermost Drabblefest: Please Join In!
« Reply #1523 on: June 22, 2007, 08:03:41 am »
Morning everyone,

For today,

  • candle and match
  • a long, thick length of rope
  • regrets

L
Taming Groomzilla<-- support equality for same-sex marriage in Maine by clicking this link!

Offline MaineWriter

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Re: The Bettermost Drabblefest: Please Join In!
« Reply #1524 on: June 22, 2007, 09:33:06 am »
Ah, Susie, nice...

L
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Offline mariez

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Re: The Bettermost Drabblefest: Please Join In!
« Reply #1525 on: June 22, 2007, 12:14:06 pm »
. . . . .
Ennis stood there, staring at the road.  Then he sat back down next to Tom.  “Do you still have any of that strawberry jam?  We oughta bring some to Junior tomorrow” Ennis said.  Tom turned to him, but for once he couldn’t find the words.

Ennis smiled his faint, nervous smile.  “I think she’ll like it” he said. 

Marl, that was perfect - especially loved these last lines, where you hit exactly the right "Ennis" note.  I'm enjoying this continuing story so much.   :)


I wrote this one a while ago back on IMDb, but I think it fits quite nicely here.
. . . . .
He stood a while, lost in thought, hypnotised by the bubbles forming as water splashed against the rocks.  He felt two arms encircling his body, easing him back, warm breath on his neck, a unique scent of musk, sweat, whiskey and smoke, a soft humming in his ear, “Ennis, you’re sleeping on your feet like a horse.” 

He smiled to himself through tears, time to let you go Jack, no more regrets, saddled up and headed on back to the truck.

Susie, I'm smiling through tears also.  I just loved that (and being a hopeless romantic is a good thing, I'm afraid I'm one of them too).  I'm so glad you shared this.  :) 

Thanks,
Marie
The measure of a country's greatness is its ability to retain compassion in times of crisis         ~~~~~~~~~Thurgood Marshall

The worst loneliness is not to be comfortable with yourself.    ~~~~~~~~~ Mark Twain

Offline Lumière

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Re: The Bettermost Drabblefest: Please Join In!
« Reply #1526 on: June 22, 2007, 01:00:24 pm »
Hello everyone!  Great drabble Susie! Wonderful.  :)

Here is my dabble ...


Between you and me..

I assumed you’d always be there..
I never really thought things through
Or imagined where we were headed;
I just figured you’d keep coming,
Maybe few times a year
Till we are old and grey…

I assumed you always knew my heart..
There was no need for many words
Or a display of soft feelings;
I just figured you understood
That it all comes back to you,
Everything I became, everything I am now..

I see the man you are, always did
I read your silence, understood your pain;
And like you say, I will always be there
Till we are old and grey…


I assumed you could live the lie..
I never saw how much I smothered you,
Dragging you into the shadows with me;
I just figured we’d be safer in hiding,
Away from all the condemning eyes
I did it for us, I was thinking of you…

I assumed I could make it up to you..
Every kiss I failed to place on your lips
Every touch I stopped myself from giving;
I just figured I’d make them disappear
But the painful reminders keep coming
Everywhere I look, nothing but regrets...

It pains me to watch you cry and hurt,
We both made mistakes, but we had our moments.
You never forced me to stay, I wanted to
About that, I have absolutely no regrets..


I assumed you always knew..
That it was always about you;
The words were always at the tip of my tongue
… I love you.

You assumed right, I always knew;
And if you listen everyday
You’ll always hear me reminding  you …
…I love you too.





(~275 words)


Offline cwby30

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Re: The Bettermost Drabblefest: Please Join In!
« Reply #1527 on: June 22, 2007, 03:02:07 pm »
One of these days I'll really do a "drabble"...still can't get the hang of writing "short" vignettes. Oh well, hope you won't hold it against me. Here goes.

***********

Circle JE Ranch, September 1984


After lighting the candles, Jack blew out the match and stood back to survey the table. Just right.  "Babe, dinner's ready, come and get it."

He heard Ennis walking down the stairs and across the living room, and saw the looks cross his face when he rounded the corner into the darkened dining room. Surprise, happiness, love, that grin that Ennis gave only to him. 

"What...? How'd ya know?"

"Junior, and about time, too. Couldn't wait any more for you to tell me, so had to ask her."

"Been so long since...can't remember when... almost forgot."

"Well, now you won't ever have to remember, 'cause I won't ever forget for you. Happy Birthday, our first birthday party together in our place."

"Dammit," Ennis said, "must have somethin' in my eye." Ennis wiped a sleeve across his face, and then pulled him into a strong hug and a deep kiss. "Thank ya, darlin', for this and for everythin'," Ennis whispered into his ear, before nibbling on it.

"You're welcome." Catching something in Ennis' voice, he added, "Any regrets?" He could hardly get the words out, with the sensations of Ennis' tongue probing his ear and his own hands running through Ennis' damp curls and their two bodies joined from thigh to cheek.

"Nope, never had and never will!" Ennis pulled back enough to look him in the eyes, deep blue meeting dark amber. "And don't ya have none, either, Jack. Best thing that ever happened to me, next to fallin in love with ya. Wish it hadn't taken almost losing ya to..."

"Hey, none a that, you hear?. Ancient history, Babe." He pulled Ennis back into a hug, then forced himself to untangle himself from Ennis, all the while realizing that they would never be untangled. "Now, you better blow out the candles before they melt more wax all over the frosting or set off the fire alarm."

"Hey, there's not that many!"

"Oh yeah, there are, old man."

"Who ya callin old?"

"You, you're older than me," grabbing the camera off the buffet. "Make a wish. And say cheese!"

Ennis leaned over, smiled, and blew out the candles, as the camera flashed.

One of the pictures, a smiling Ennis in front of his birthday cake with all 41 candles ablaze, still sits on the dining room buffet in a double silver frame, engraved with the date below it. The picture next to it in the frame is a smiling Jack in front of another birthday cake with 41 candles ablaze, engraved with another date below it. 

Offline ifyoucantfixit

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Re: The Bettermost Drabblefest: Please Join In!
« Reply #1528 on: June 22, 2007, 03:42:35 pm »
                                     Elk Grease

        Jack dug in his small duffle bag.  Felt around inside, and came up with the thing he was looking for.  He grabbed the matches, and proceeded to light the small candle he had pulled out of the bag.  "What in hell ya doin Jack?  Ennis exclaimed."  "I need to find something, he replied."  "What ya need?"  "Well if you must know, I put some of that elk grease we rendered in a jar, and stuck it in here."   "Elk grease?"  "Yeah elk grease.  It'll make things go easier."  "Things?"
Ennis looking flabbergasted.  He never failed to be totally flummoxed at Jack's boldness.  "Well
cowboy if you wanta make me buck, you gotta use this."  "Hunh," Ennis lowered his head" uhh
 ok."
        "How'd you get that idea Jack."  "Well my pa used to use stuff on the horses dicks when he was studding out to the neighbors mares..Made the joinin easier, i guess...?"  "I figured if it worked for them,?"  "Well do I need to get that long rope, too, or maybe a bridle?"  "Nope, but if you don't want to use it.  I know i'm gonna regret it later."
        "Now put out that candle afor you burn this damn tent to the ground, with us in it."  "Ok now hold on, hey, go easy there cowboy.  Nice an easy."  "See now, thats better ain't it."


." 



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Offline mariez

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Re: The Bettermost Drabblefest: Please Join In!
« Reply #1529 on: June 22, 2007, 04:11:41 pm »
Wow - this place is hopping today!  :D




Between you and me.. 
Gawdamighty, M - you have so perfectly and beautifully encapsulated their story in 275 words.  And the picture!  Amazing, as always. 


. . . .
One of the pictures, a smiling Ennis in front of his birthday cake with all 41 candles ablaze, still sits on the dining room buffet in a double silver frame, engraved with the date below it. The picture next to it in the frame is a smiling Jack in front of another birthday cake with 41 candles ablaze, engraved with another date below it. 

Hey, cwby, I thought this was a great drabble - funny, sweet and touching.   :)


                                     Elk Grease

 . . . .  "Well do I need to get that long rope, too, or maybe a bridle?"  "Nope, but if you don't want to use it.  I know i'm gonna regret it later."
        "Now put out that candle afor you burn this damn tent to the ground, with us in it."  "Ok now hold on, hey, go easy there cowboy.  Nice an easy."  "See now, thats better ain't it." 

Now you know what song I'm singing right now, don't you, Janice?  That's right - "Save a Horse, Ride a Cowboy"   :laugh:  That was a delight - just like you.   :D

Thanks,
Marie
The measure of a country's greatness is its ability to retain compassion in times of crisis         ~~~~~~~~~Thurgood Marshall

The worst loneliness is not to be comfortable with yourself.    ~~~~~~~~~ Mark Twain