Author Topic: The Bettermost Drabblefest: Please Join In!  (Read 392644 times)

Offline jpwagoneer1964

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Re: The Bettermost Drabblefest: Please Join In!
« Reply #850 on: March 27, 2007, 03:49:09 pm »
May 10th 1973

    

The Grizzly & Wolf Discovery Center, West Yellowstone, Montana.
 Alma Jr and Jenny were so excited their dad was able to take them on the  Ashgrove Elementary School field trip in Yellowstone to see the bears and wolfs. "Ah'm gonna have ta work Sunday ta make up..." Ennis had told them. they were so proud of their dad as he walked holding hands exploring the exhibits. At one habitat Ennis stood hand in pockets looking at a dark brown bear suddenly thinking of Jack, wasn't really sure why, be at least a couple of month until he would see him again... "Daddy daddy come over here...."

San Antonio Zoo, San Antonio Texas
 "Daddy... over here daddy....look at the polar bears!" Bobby called out to his dad. Jack was caught in a daze looking at a brown bear. Uncertain why the bear made him think of Ennis...but it was almost like Ennis was staring back at him...be a while yet before he would see him....maybe this time they could be together longer maybe two weeks.... "Coming Bobby be right there."  What was it about that bear?

"Dad....can I have a chocolate milkshake?"

"Sure son....come on lets go up an get one"



On the long  bus ride back to Riverton Ennis surrounded  by Alma and his daughters told the story of coming upon the bear the summer he was on Brokeback, falling of his horse "Were you scared dad?...." "A little sweatheart....the horses 'n mule ran an Ah had to go after 'm....bear.... he decided not ta follow..." everyone laughed.

"You never told that one before Ennis." Alma said

"Just didn't want ya ta worry none." Ennis smiled back as he leaned back in his seat thinking this was one of the best days ever with his family.

*********************

"Have a good day today son?" Jack spoke as he draped his arm around Bobby.

"Yes sir dad! ....glad you came with us.  Did you see those funny birds?....I think they were called the Boat-billed heron....can we come back......maybe get one of those Zoo memberships?.

"Well...lets see....your birthday is coming up...we'll come back fer sure..."

"Yeaaaaaaaaa"

« Last Edit: March 27, 2007, 06:54:21 pm by jpwagoneer1964 »
Thank you Heath and Jake for showing us Ennis and Jack,  teaching us how much they loved one another.

Offline mariez

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Re: The Bettermost Drabblefest: Please Join In!
« Reply #851 on: March 27, 2007, 04:17:11 pm »
A zoo. Of all places, Ennis never would have thought he would have such a great day in a zoo. He smiled to himself.

Jack, if you had seen me today, you would't believe it.

But maybe he had seen him. Thoughout the day, the thoughts of Jack had been intense. It was almost like he had been there with him. Right there in the zoo, watching zebras and giraffes, carrying little Steven piggyback, buying him and Lizzy a second icecream, despite of Alma Jr.'s frown.

Ennis opened the closet door and laid down on his bed. He started to dream of Jack even before he closed his eyes. In his dreams the worlds began to mingle, he saw Jack carrying Lizzy, then he kissed Jack, deep and slow, but it wasn't up on Brokeback, it was on Junior's back porch and he could hear his grandchildren's voices somewhere in the background.
Then there was only Jack left. At first he didn't say a word, but his smile was warm and welcoming and his eyes were shining when he embraced Ennis and whispered in his ear "You're home now, Ennis."

Ennis Del Mar's last day on earth had been a very happy one.

204 words

One of the most beautiful drabbles ever, Chrissi (it got me all choked up).  :'(


.  .  .
Jack leaned over, pulling Ennis close. “I can’t keep it hidden, cowboy. I love you.”

“And I love you too.” Ennis ran his finger along Jack’s cheekbone, then leaned in for a kiss. “And I ain’t ever gonna stop.”

Ahh . . so great to be back at the Lazy L with a lot of schmoopy goodness.   :)


.  .  .
“I've been head over heels before too, ya know..” he added.

“Was it Ma?  The person you were crazy about?” Jenny asked, her eyes wide.

Ennis smiled again, “No stories until you’ve finished yer homework.  I’ll be back to check ‘em in half an hour!” he said, walking back into the kitchen.

Aww, I love seeing Ennis with his darlin' girls.  Very touching.


.  . . Ennis smiled back as he leaned back in his seat thinking this was one of the best days ever with his family.

.  .  .
"Have a good day today son?" Jack spoke as he draped his arm around Bobby.

Mark, I loved everything about this - thinking about each other -  but I liked that they were able to have a happy time with their kids.  It was perfect!  :)

Thanks, all
The measure of a country's greatness is its ability to retain compassion in times of crisis         ~~~~~~~~~Thurgood Marshall

The worst loneliness is not to be comfortable with yourself.    ~~~~~~~~~ Mark Twain

Offline Cameron

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Re: The Bettermost Drabblefest: Please Join In!
« Reply #852 on: March 27, 2007, 06:09:02 pm »
The Bear

(June 1963)
Ennis and Jack were just finished eating.  “That was good” Jack said wiping his mouth with his sleeve.

Ennis only nodded, he actually preferred the beans to the elk meat.

“Were ya scared?”  Jack asked.

“Huh?”

“Scared, of the bear?”

“Naw” Ennis replied but he smiled a little to himself thinking of how fast he ran away from it.

“I saw a bear once, in a zoo” Jack said.  “A little zoo that came travelin’ near Lightning Flat.  The bear was in a cage, it looked real sad and scared too.”

Ennis looked at Jack, his face was glowing in the warmth of the campfire.

Jack continued  “if there was any justice in the world, all them animals would be set free.”

“Mmmm” Ennis replied, looking at Jack's hands as he was warming them in the fire.

“Well, guess I gotta go to the sheep now.”  Jack said, getting up.

“It’s late, and dark, maybe it’s better to go in the morning, at first light.”  Ennis said remembering Jack and his trouble with his horse.

“Alright, wouldn’t find my way there anyway” Jack said and sat back down.  Ennis kept looking at Jack’s hands.  He touched the spot on his face where Jack had tried to clean off the blood.  He remembered the feel of Jack’s fingers, he felt a strange tingling.

They both fell asleep by the fire.  Ennis was dreaming, but he really wasn’t sure if he was asleep or awake.  He saw the bear again, then Jack reaching for him.  He was on a hill, the bear was screaming at him, just like he did before.  But Jack was near him, now touching him.  Suddenly, Ennis felt himself falling, falling head over heels down the hill.

The fall jerked Ennis awake, he was breathing real hard.  He looked all around, but there was no bear coming after him now.   He looked over at Jack, sleeping peacefully by the fire.  Ennis tried to close his eyes and fall asleep again.  But every time he tried to close his eyes he felt like he was falling once more.

« Last Edit: March 27, 2007, 11:48:08 pm by marlb42 »



Offline TH

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... a little explanation...
« Reply #853 on: March 27, 2007, 08:07:13 pm »

   I wanted to write to explain why I have removed my postings and have asked that they be removed from the archive.

   My postings were overly large and as I don't want to take the time to re-edit them apart from what was required to post them initially... I have removed them.  Most would not have made a great deal of sense on a completely stand alone basis.  I suspect that the size limit is technical although it has the effect of focusing the drabbles, the vignettes, and that is good. 

   The other reason I've done this is because I am uncomfortable with two of the guidelines. 

   Here they are:
      ---------------
            Three prompts will be posted per day. A writer can use an older prompt but if you do, please identify what it is at the beginning of your drabble. Drabbles do need to be written in response to prompts.

            This is a new guideline: writers are limited to one, or maybe two, max, drabbles per day.
      ---------------

   I see them as unnecessary and restrictive. 

   Prompts to trigger creativity are good.  Limiting input to those prompts is not. 

   Also, the creativity that BBM has engendered seems to want to go in all sorts of directions and I see no reason how limiting the number posts per day is a benefit.  It would seem that 'the more the merrier' would be the rule here.

   I agree with the comment that the scope of the input here is truly amazing and it is in that light that I see these guidelines as restrictive and counter productive. 

   I am continuing to follow along and to write as things come to me. 

Thanks. 

(words:  279)
« Last Edit: March 27, 2007, 08:17:08 pm by TH »
I know you think I know that you know what you think I said.
Know you what you think I know you know is not what I meant?

Offline MaineWriter

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Re: The Bettermost Drabblefest: Please Join In!
« Reply #854 on: March 28, 2007, 06:22:49 am »
Good morning all,

Today's prompts:

  • salt
  • artist
  • corner

Have fun....

Leslie
Taming Groomzilla<-- support equality for same-sex marriage in Maine by clicking this link!

Offline cwby30

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Re: Ennis Del Mar, Ranchhand
« Reply #855 on: March 28, 2007, 01:38:28 pm »
Morning'.

TH: Sorry to see that you removed your postings.  Rather than ditch us entirely, how about starting your own thread? You can re-post everything there, and you won't have to worry about the length.  Or, you can post them in your own  journal, and in your own thread post the links so we can read them. 

As you know, I really enjoyed your story and would hate it if you don't/can't continue to share it with us. 

Thanks.

Offline Lumičre

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Re: Ennis Del Mar, Ranchhand
« Reply #856 on: March 28, 2007, 01:42:11 pm »
TH: Sorry to see that you removed your postings.  Rather than ditch us entirely, how about starting your own thread? You can re-post everything there, and you won't have to worry about the length.  Or, you can post them in your own  journal, and in your own thread post the links so we can read them. 

As you know, I really enjoyed your story and would hate it if you don't/can't continue to share it with us. 

Thanks.

A suggestion I offered earlier on as well.  :) 

~M
« Last Edit: March 28, 2007, 03:46:38 pm by Lucise »


Offline Lumičre

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Re: The Bettermost Drabblefest: Please Join In!
« Reply #857 on: March 28, 2007, 01:48:35 pm »
A dabble .. :)


The morning after ..

September 25th 1967.


They pulled up in front of the Old Horse Diner downtown Riverton and walked in.

“I’m starvin’,” Jack said, pulling back a chair at a vacant table in the corner and plopping into it.  Ennis sat down across from him.  The waitress, a beautiful young woman with long pigtails and a too short skirt stopped by and took their orders, flashing a big smile and swinging her hips as she walked away.

“I swear that waitress is sweet on ya.  See how she was flirtin’ and givin’ the eye?” Jack joked, shaking his head at the swaying hips.  “Yer abit quiet this mornin’,” he added, resting his elbows on the wooden table and looking closely at Ennis.

“Can’t wait to git outta town..” Ennis replied, anxiously looking around at the other patrons.  “Just don’t want to run into anyone I know, is all..”

“What if ya do, we ain’t doing nuthin’ wrong, are we? Relax Ennis ..” Jack smiled.

Moments later, the waitress returned with two platefuls of scrambled eggs, hash browns, sizzling strips of bacon, and two cups of hot brew.  Jack sprinkled some salt and pepper on his eggs and started eagerly on his meal. 

“Pretty hungry, hunh?”  Ennis smiled.

Jack leaned in closer, “After last night, ya blame me?” Ennis blushed and looked down at his meal, “Better keep yer voice down, Jack..”, he said, shifting uncomfortably in his seat.

Jack paused and looked up from his food, “Ennis, we’ll be outta here in no time at all..” he whispered, “An’ ya know what I wanna do first thing when we git to the mountains?”  Ennis shook his head, aware of the feel of Jack’s leg touching his underneath the small table.  His eyes wandered down to Jack’s oily lips..

Jack continued, his voice low, “I wanna do it ... in the sun, in the river .. out in the open, just like we used to..”

Ennis swallowed hard, their eyes locked for a time.. “Can’t wait..” he finally said, his voice barely audible.
« Last Edit: March 28, 2007, 03:51:31 pm by Lucise »


Offline mariez

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Re: The Bettermost Drabblefest: Please Join In!
« Reply #858 on: March 28, 2007, 04:50:05 pm »
.  .  .“Mmmm” Ennis replied, looking at Jack's hands as he was warming them in the fire.

I loved how Ennis kept looking at Jack's hands!  Perfect detail, Marl.


.  .  .
Jack continued, his voice low, “I wanna do it ... in the sun, in the river .. out in the open, just like we used to..”

Ennis swallowed hard, their eyes locked for a time.. “Can’t wait..” he finally said, his voice barely audible.

Dang, that is hot and lovely, M! 

Thanks!
Marie
The measure of a country's greatness is its ability to retain compassion in times of crisis         ~~~~~~~~~Thurgood Marshall

The worst loneliness is not to be comfortable with yourself.    ~~~~~~~~~ Mark Twain

Offline jpwagoneer1964

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Re: The Bettermost Drabblefest: Please Join In!
« Reply #859 on: March 28, 2007, 05:32:22 pm »
November 22, 1983

“Something to drink, honey?” waitress very aware of these to handsome strangers, happy to have a customer.

“Bring us two beers to start, ma’am” Jack enjoying the attention, winks at her.

Waitress arrives back with the beers and menus.

“Ma’am, I hear tell you have the best chicken fried steak in the whole state”

“Well sweetheart that’s a fact! You want I’ll bring you fine young men two plates? Comes with everything” Flirting with Jack.

Ennis is turning red, Jack grins back and says “ surely Ma’am”

After homemade split pea soup, green salad with roman lettuce and spinach leaves with ranch dressing served in one large bowel to be divvied out, the waitress sets a huge oval plate in front of Ennis and Jack.  On them are the most crispy tender chicken fried steak in all of the west, large potato pancake floating in sausage gravy, freshly cooked string beans in a separate saucer. Also placed on the table along with extra gravy, tray of fresh butter is covered basket of freshly made country biscuits, with honey or jam on the side. Both men look upon it ravenously,lightly salting their food. and dive in.

Plates clean, biscuits devoured, piece of apple pie with ice cream downed apiece, two empty beer glasses used for each of them, Jack looks to Ennis. “Now wasn’t that worth the trip?”.

“Sure enough was, one of the best ever had.” Ennis, feeling full and glad to have Jack with him to enjoy it. “thank you bud.”

“You boys go’ in to be around these parts again soon I hope!” waitress laying down the check.

“I’ll be back, just to see you ma‘am!” Jack grinning, with a wink.

“I’ll be wait’ in sweetheart.” Ennis turns red again.

Jack leaves a ten dollar tip on a $30.00 tab. Both tip hats as they leave.

Outside as Ennis starts toward the truck “Ennis, let's take walk, need to work off this meal”

“We otta be headin’ back, more ‘n two hours back to Riverton.”

“Just around the block, won’t take anytime at ‘ll. Come on” Jack looks to Ennis.

“All right then, but we should get a move on.” Ennis moves to walk in step with Jack.


Excerpt from '131 MILES TO RIVERTON'
« Last Edit: March 28, 2007, 07:39:03 pm by jpwagoneer1964 »
Thank you Heath and Jake for showing us Ennis and Jack,  teaching us how much they loved one another.