SPOILERSThose are excellent thoughts, nic! Yep, Ennis and guilt go hand-in-hand, so it's never surprised me that Ennis would feel he "deserved" whatever kind of hardships that would come his way, accepting those as his "punishment." It's the self-inflicted part that I struggle with, along with bringing Jack into the picture. I think, also, Ennis struggles with the idea (evidenced by the awful dream he had) that because he is living openly with Jack he has put both of them in the very danger he has always feared - adding another layer of guilt.
Both your explanations make a lot of sense - I would probably lean toward the second. In this story, Ennis isn't "nothing and nowhere," so I don't think he's feeling that level of resentment toward Jack - although he is still obviously not as comfortable with being gay as Jack is. (But as we saw when Jack's dad died, Jack his own issues.) I also think that he hasn't been aware (until recently when Jack told him expliciitly) of just
how hard it was for Jack to do as he asked - so I agree that he is not consciously trying to hurt Jack at all.
Perhaps the author is trying to make us aware that, just because Ennis didn't leave Jack when they came down from the mountain, he still has the same fears, guilts, insecurities, and paranoias as the Ennis that did leave Jack does, and these have to be addressed in some way. Just a guess. And, yes, I've always been amused by the use of the word "utopian."
Thanks,
Marie
