But that points to both the typicality of the situation in the period and location, and also that a ranch is no place for toddlers with no one to look after them.
Right. I'm not saying the general culture of the time and place wasn't sexist, nor that a ranch doesn't present childcare difficulties (though countless children have survived them).
As for Ennis calling his family, remember, his parents are dead, his sister is in Casper (am I confused or remembering that correctly?), and I think we don't really know where his married brother is living. It never occurred to me to question that Alma's "people," including her sister, were the ones close by, so that Ennis calling his own sister wouldn't even have entered into the calculation.
Hunh? I must have misworded -- I wasn't suggesting Ennis call his
own relatives. I was saying it would be easier for Alma to call her sister than it would be for Ennis to call Alma's sister.
He is jeopardizing her ability to make needed extra money--but that look on his face says to me that he clearly devalues her job compared to his own (one male ego speaking to another, I guess. 
)
Well, again, I don't read the look that way -- I read it as suggesting that it's easier for her to take the kids under the circumstances than it would be for him. He's putting on pressure, yes. And it's quite possible he does value his job over hers. But here, his motivation seems to be to be less about male domination than expedience.
ZouBEini, the expression of Ennis' that might convey that kind of threatening look, in my view, is the one he gives Jack when he says "all them things that I don't know could get you killed if I should come to know them." Here he looks less threatening than imploring.
We will really have to agree to disagree yet again, because I do not believe that the filmmakers "go out of their way elsewhere to show Ennis is NOT that sexist." I see virtually all of his behavior toward Alma as sexist.
Hunh? Outside of the ash-can scene -- and of course the grocery store scene we're debating -- where do you see this?
I see his behavior as sexist though typical of a man raised when and where and with the value system that he was raised ... I see those bits of business where Ennis displays caring behavior toward his daughters as only intending only to convey that he loves them, nothing more, nothing about his ideas or role in their care.
I agree that the value system in which he was raised is undoubtedly sexist -- we know that because we know something about the culture of rural uneducated America. But I see his behavior as distinctly
atypical of that. As I said, he doesn't come home from work and crack a beer and turn on the TV and put his feet up and yell, "Hey Alma, I think I hear the girls crying -- better go check on em!" as the cultural sterotype would suggest.
No, just the opposite. He goes to sooth the babies, wipe their noses, later puts them to bed. I have to ask again, how often do you see men in movies doing that? It's not unheard of, but it's not common, either, and especially not when the intention is to portray a character as the sexist product of a sexist culture. To me, what Ennis is doing here IS distinctly different from just showing love. Love is promising to go to the church picnic if he doesn't have to sing. Here he's performing actual childcare -- and not the fun part, either. I don't see the "three hands" remark as venting annoyance at Alma for slaving away at her kitchen drudgery rather than rushing in to attend to her motherly duties. Not at all. I see it as the bewilderment of a man trying to sooth two screaming kids, one in each arm, a situation that can feel overwhelming to anyone, man or woman.
Look, I don't mean to portray Ennis as the Alan Alda of Riverton. I'm sure if he and I got to talking about feminism, there'd be some areas of disagreement. It's just that if Ennis were meant to seem sexist, given that there would be plenty of easy ways to suggest that, and given that men in movies aren't often shown doing domestic chores at all, then why would the fillmmakers bother showing Ennis performing childcare and clearing dishes
in the first place? (It was Monroe, remember, who relaxed in front of the TV during Thanksgiving's after-dinner cleanup.)
And somebody, somewhere, on some thread--it wasn't me, honest it wasn't--has wondered why Alma left the baby cry and kept on with that scrubbing rather than dry her hands, let the laundry wait, and go see to the baby.
No, I don't blame Alma, either. She had a lot of work to do and sick kids spend a lot of time crying. The reality of parenting is, sometimes you have to let kids cry for a few minutes, knowing they'll survive the experience. She was keeping close enough tabs, however, to know that a nose needed wiping.
BTW, Jeff and Opinionista and ZouBeini and everyone else: Do you see Jack as sexist? After all, Jack grew up in more or less the same culture as Ennis did.
