Forced "Out"

[silkncense]

Don't know if this is on any other thread but the entertainment news has Lance Bass stating that he is gay.  He also said that because of "rumors" he felt it was necessary to come forward at this time & that he was upset that his mother found out via gossip blurbs before he could personally talk to her.

The 'reporter' Perez Hilton (?) said he feels it is his job to 'report what is known' & as a gay man feels it is right to "out" people.

So, is it right to reveal a secret that a person does not want the world at large to know?  Under what circumstances?  I personally have a secret that I've shared with only two people.  I do NOT believe it is anyone's right but mine to do so.

Others?

[vkm91941]

I agree with you completely that's one of the many reasons that Ted C and his awful gossip reports of "toothy tile" were so offensive to me.  There is much speculation on the IMDb BBM board that Lance is actually Toothy Tile.  But I don't care one way or the other.  The very  fact that this is cover story news is ridiculous.

[delalluvia]

Anyone who tries to out someone against their will is a low-lying, scum-sucking bottom feeder.  Take that Perez/Ted C. 

[Aussie Chris]

Personally I would say that it is neither right nor necessary, as it serves no public service.  That's the short answer.  A reporter might argue with that, so a more complete and analytical way of looking at it might be:

Q - Is sexual orientation personal or public information?
A - I think the answer is obvious (personal), but if someone disagrees then we simply have to ask:

Q - Would revealing this information affect the public interest or the individual's (which includes their friends and family)
A - There may be the odd exception (I can't think of any though) but I think it's clear this only affects the individual.

Ok, now that we've established how to tell if there is public or individual impact:

Q - Is it "right" to report personal information that has no public impact?
A - Again, I think this has an obvious answer - a definite no.

If anyone can see a flaw in my logic I'd love to hear it...

[ednbarby]

Anyone who tries to out someone against their will is a low-lying, scum-sucking bottom feeder.  Take that Perez/Ted C. 

Couldn't have said it better myself.

I would like to add, though, that anyone gay or not (initials OPRAH WINFREY!!!) who specifically tells the world "I'm "NOT gay"" belongs in the same category.  Yes, they're just as wrong to be trying to "out" her, but emphatically responding with "I'm not gay" is not the answer.  All that does is contribute to the stigma.  Jerk.  God, she's such an idiot.

[YaadPyar]

 but emphatically responding with "I'm not gay" is not the answer.  All that does is contribute to the stigma.  Jerk.  God, she's such an idiot.

What is the right answer?

[ednbarby]

What is the right answer?

The right answer is not to say what you are not, but to say what you are.  Jake handled it perfectly when the rumors were flying about him and Austin Nichols.  "We are good friends."  Period.

[Kelda]

Couldn't have said it better myself.

I would like to add, though, that anyone gay or not (initials OPRAH WINFREY!!!) who specifically tells the world "I'm "NOT gay"" belongs in the same category.  Yes, they're just as wrong to be trying to "out" her, but emphatically responding with "I'm not gay" is not the answer.  All that does is contribute to the stigma.  Jerk.  God, she's such an idiot.

whats this please explain! romours about oprah winfrey that shes gay?? 

[henrypie]

I remember on an episode of The West Wing, there were rumors of gayness swirling around C.J. the press secretary (played by the great Allison Janney).  If I recall, she made a statement at a press conference saying "it's none of anyone's business," even though she was in fact not gay and couldn't be blamed for being tempted to play the straight card.

But alas, that's fantasy-land.

My other president is Martin Sheen, as my friend Betsy would say, rolling her eyes heavenward.

[ednbarby]

I remember on an episode of The West Wing, there were rumors of gayness swirling around C.J. the press secretary (played by the great Allison Janney).  If I recall, she made a statement at a press conference saying "it's none of anyone's business," even though she was in fact not gay and couldn't be blamed for being tempted to play the straight card.

But alas, that's fantasy-land.

Yep.  That's really the best answer.  But yes, most people in the real world don't have the cajones (or their press agents don't allow them to use them if they do) to actually say that.

Kelda, I didn't know there were rumors afloat that Oprah was gay until I read all over the place here where she emphatically said she is not.  Apparently, she's been close friends with a woman named Gayle for 30 years and has said that their connection is "otherworldly" and that our culture doesn't have a word to decribe a friendship as close as theirs.  That's cool.  And I may be being too hard on her (NO!  Really???) - it may be that the press are the only ones saying "Oprah: I'm not gay" when really she didn't say that verbatim.  It's been known to happen before.