Author Topic: Singles R Us  (Read 25772 times)

Offline notBastet

  • BetterMost Supporter!
  • BetterMost 1000+ Posts Club
  • *****
  • Posts: 1,276
  • no way out but through
Re: Singles R Us
« Reply #30 on: October 29, 2007, 11:23:27 pm »
I don't cook worth a damn, so being Susie Homemaker and cooking all my meals to save money doesn't work.

One day, when I have time (no movies to watch, no chores worth tending to, and nothing to dwell on) I would like to sit down, do some math, and see if it is cheaper for me to feed myself through takeout (which can often provide multiple meals) or the standard grocery fare... 

One of the things I hate about _____ (can't figure out exact pc word to put there) is the whole Susie Homemaker image.  I also can't cook worth a damn.  My mom, who would die of embarrassment if she read me saying this, didn't exactly spend time teaching me to cook as I was growing up.  My dad, in fact, did a lot of the cooking, for better or worse (veg-all was the vegetable staple for awhile).  I didn't particularly care - I wasn't sitting around wishing my mom had more time to spend teaching me how to cook.  But, I still get aggravated at how this one person I was involved with couldn't understand why I didn't have the instinctual longing to prepare a meal for him - he really took it personally!
“It can be a little distressing to have to overintellectualize yourself” - Heath Ledger

Offline Jeff Wrangler

  • BetterMost Supporter!
  • The BetterMost 10,000 Post Club
  • *****
  • Posts: 31,165
  • "He somebody you cowboy'd with?"
Re: Singles R Us
« Reply #31 on: October 30, 2007, 04:41:00 pm »
Men are just too expensive.

You got that right, sister--and not just financially.  :laugh:  :laugh:  :-\
"It is required of every man that the spirit within him should walk abroad among his fellow-men, and travel far and wide."--Charles Dickens.

Offline ennisjack

  • Jr. Ranch Hand
  • **
  • Posts: 28
Re: Singles R Us
« Reply #32 on: January 10, 2008, 08:55:20 am »
My sister was recently dumped by her young lover.  I listened to her grief with sympathy, though I had my doubts about what kind of relationship it really was (my sister's self-esteem is rock bottom and she will consider some guy she gave a blowjob to after a night on the town as the beginning of a 'relationship').  At some point she wailed,

"Well, do you just give up?"

That woke me up because I realized it was not a rhetorical question.  Though I had forgotten and not thought much of it, she was well aware I have not dated nor even had sex with anyone in over 4 years now.

I told her that we were just two different people.  She had been married and now had a child so relationships with men were very important to her, while I have been for the most part single all my life, and relationships with men were just something that kinda came and went.

The longer I stay alone, the longer I like to stay alone and after much thought, have decided that men are just too expensive.  I'm a feminist of the old school and believe in equal dating.  He treats me, I treat him and believe me, he gets the better end of the deal because men eat a great deal.  My restaurant meals consist of an entree and some ice tea.  My last few exes idea of dinner was wine, an appetizer, a salad, an entree and dessert!

Even eating at home was expensive.  My idea of an at-home meal left them hungry, so much larger portions and/or snacks were the order of the day.

I was going broke fast dating them.

Hey Dela.

   Yer right, most men can be expensive. I, myself, am usually just content with a burger and fries as my appetite over the years has shrunk considerably. LOL
If ya can't fix it, ya gotta stand it; If ya can't stand it, ya gotta fix it; If ya can't do either one then ya either need some serious help or yer screwed

Offline ennisjack

  • Jr. Ranch Hand
  • **
  • Posts: 28
Re: Singles R Us
« Reply #33 on: January 10, 2008, 09:12:16 am »
Hey All.

   I just wanted to say that I've read everyone's posts here and I really enjoyed them.

  I myself have been single for the last 42 years (which is how old I am) and it's had it's ups and downs. The last time I've even had sex was just before I got out of the service and that was way back in 2002. Even then, it was a one night stand here and there or just a quick lay and leave.

  At first, I thought I was straight, but that never worked because as soon as she started b****ing I'd boot her butt out the door. Then I tried the gay route, but that turned out to be ho-hum. Finally, I decided to heck with it and became an asexual(whatever that really means) and just gave up on the whole thing.

   I guess it could be that I've never really liked anyone I was with for more than a few minutes, so, I never gave the dating scene and quality time. I guess you could say that I have a dominant Ennis personality with a minimum of Jack thrown in.

  Also, for nb's purposes, I usually try to spend at least $50 dollars a week on groceries, but since I've moved here I usually spend about $100 every time I go to the store since I make very few trips into town. Most of the time I'm pretty much snowed in and have to use a snowmobile just to get to my car depending on if there is one available.

  Anyway, that's my sorry lovelife in a nutshell.
If ya can't fix it, ya gotta stand it; If ya can't stand it, ya gotta fix it; If ya can't do either one then ya either need some serious help or yer screwed

Offline ZK

  • BetterMost 1000+ Posts Club
  • ******
  • Posts: 1,206
Re: Singles R Us
« Reply #34 on: January 15, 2008, 07:37:37 am »
Re being single, for me is taking a bit of getting used.

Re groceries: I am fortunate because I am supplied two smallish meals a day at work (if I get time to eat - mind you the other day I scored five meals yay)  After checking microsoft money I evidentally spend about $60.00-$80.00 a week, not counting take-aways. I normally only have coffee for breakfast, a light lunch with the main meal at night. If I have my daughter with me we have dessert, otherwise I skip dessert. At the tender age of 43 I am learning how to cook, so I am always up for takeaways or dining out

Offline Katness

  • Brokeback Got Me Good
  • *****
  • Posts: 336
  • Proud wolf in human clothing.
Re: Singles R Us
« Reply #35 on: January 16, 2008, 01:40:54 am »
Ok, I actually don't know the average I spend on groceries as it tends to fluctuate depending on what I need to get at the time.

I have not actually been in a relationship yet. But, I am more then ready now. I actually chose to wait till I had sorted myself out and raised my self esteem and got older so I could get together with someone in the age group I'm interested in with out it seeming too odd.

But now, I'm ready for my, uhh, own "BBM" experience so to speak. However, patience is a virtue.  ;D

Sincerely, Kat.
I'm not a complete idiot, some parts are missing.

If all is not lost, then where is it?

I used to have a handle on life, but it broke.

Offline Kelda

  • BetterMost Supporter!
  • Moderator
  • The BetterMost 10,000 Post Club
  • *****
  • Posts: 14,703
  • Zorbing....
    • Keldas Facebook Page!
Re: Singles R Us
« Reply #36 on: January 16, 2008, 03:03:26 pm »
Ok, I actually don't know the average I spend on groceries as it tends to fluctuate depending on what I need to get at the time.

I have not actually been in a relationship yet. But, I am more then ready now. I actually chose to wait till I had sorted myself out and raised my self esteem and got older so I could get together with someone in the age group I'm interested in with out it seeming too odd.

But now, I'm ready for my, uhh, own "BBM" experience so to speak. However, patience is a virtue.  ;D

Sincerely, Kat.

Good on you Kat - I hope 2008 is the year for you!
http://www.idbrass.com

Please use the following links when shopping online -It will help us raise money without costing you a penny.

http://www.easyfundraising.org.uk/idb

http://idb.easysearch.org.uk/

Offline roryennis

  • Jr. Ranch Hand
  • **
  • Posts: 36
Re: Singles R Us
« Reply #37 on: February 07, 2008, 12:39:05 am »
I spend about $150 to $200 in groceries every two weeks between my parents, my nieces and I, plus two big dogs and 3 cats. I mostly shop and Sams. Living in the suburbs of Philadelphia is fairly expensive.

I've been divorced for 10 yrs. In the beginning I liked being single and "finding" myself again. Recently I started dating but nothing sparked not even a click, pretty sad isn't it.

This guy I dated a couple of times decided that it we were better as friends and we do have fun together.

I'm still waiting for my Jack to spark my Ennis.  Someone that shrares my quriky interests of art, Broadway, movies, going to the circus, hockey, going to Soho on the weekends in the sumer and  horses, horses, horses.
 
Jack Twist.
Ennis
Your folks just stopped at Ennis?
Del Mar
Nice to know ya Ennis Del Mar.

And so with that introduction Jack and Ennis are forever bound together like Adam & Eve and Romeo & Juliet.

Offline opinionista

  • BetterMost 1000+ Posts Club
  • ******
  • Posts: 2,939
Re: Singles R Us
« Reply #38 on: February 10, 2008, 08:41:15 am »
Recently I started dating but nothing sparked not even a click, pretty sad isn't it.

Don't say that. Meeting and dating different people can be fun too, even if you don't click. At least you had a date! Just enjoy it. Someone will come along.
Good judgement comes from experience. Experience comes from bad judgement. -Mark Twain.

Offline delalluvia

  • BetterMost 5000+ Posts Club
  • *******
  • Posts: 8,289
  • "Truth is an iron bride"
Re: Singles R Us
« Reply #39 on: February 10, 2008, 02:22:47 pm »
Single and happy for the most part.    I've been in a few relationships.    I've come to the realization that is not always them, sometimes it is me.   I can be self centered at times.   And you are always the last to know you are being self centered until someone points it out.
I've lived alone now for the last 10 years.    It doesn't bother me.   Thankgoodness for the internet.   That helps kill any bordom and need for outside contact when needed.   What I do misss is having single friends to do things with.  No, not just sex.  LOL.    Although a few friends with benefits doesn't hurt.   ::)


I just read an interesting sentence in a book I was reading.  The main character was asking another man why his mother refused the other man's marriage proposal.  The man responded without rancor:

"She wisely refused me, saying she thought I was quite unfit for marriage to anyone...she perceived...that I am a natural bachelor and much too fond of my own company and habits to make the adjustments required by marriage..."

Relationships require a lot of compromise and some of us sometimes just aren't ready/able/willing to make those adjustments.  I don't find that self-centered.  You like what you like. 

I find that another year has begun, I'm still single, men still find me very attractive, but I have no urge to make the effort to meet men.  I'm hardly asexual, my libido was always as high or higher than my ex-lovers, but I just find it too much trouble and am more concerned with saving money to buy a house and I don't need any unnecessary expenses  :P

Are intimate relationships necessary?