TOTW 16/07: Did Alma Jr. know Ennis was gay?

[Katie77]

I think she asked Ennis to her wedding out of curtesy and respect to her father.......truth is, her mother probably told her "you better get out there and let your father know about the wedding and invite him"....truth is, she probably did not think he would be able to attend anyway.....

It was obvious that Alma Jnr and Ennis had not had a lot of communication since she had met her future husband, Ennis didnt know what he did for a living, or even his name, so the father and daughter were not THAT close.....and that doesnt mean there was any friction with them, a teenage girl would be spending more time with her friends and boyfriend......

I think Ennis did a bit of soul searching, listening to Alma Jnr talk about how much she loved her guy.....and saying he would come to the wedding, was his way of showing her that it was glad to see her so happy and that he would do whatever he needed to do, to celebrate and be there on her special day....he was telling her she was important to him, and he was prepared to make the effort for her.

[Jeff Wrangler]

Whether we are supposed to assume it or not, because of tradition, Junior doesn't actually ask Ennis to come to the wedding and give her away. She just says she was hoping he would be there. It has crossed my mind more than once that McMurtry and Ossana and Lee might just as easily have had her say, "Was hopin' you could come and give me away," but they didn't.

And the look on her face when he initially says no is kind of like, "Same as always, I can't be there for you." Like she more or less expected it.

Let's also not forget that we have seen Ennis negotiating for time off from a job without actually quitting it. The conflict with Jack on their last fishing trip is precipitated because Ennis had traded off working all August--when he had promised to spend time with Jack--in order to get the time off earlier in the year.

[Katie77]

We have really got off the track of the original question here....but its been great discussion just the same....

Back to the original question.....Did Alma Jnr.know Ennis was gay?

In a nutshell........Crikey!....Ennis DID NOT KNOW he was gay.....so why or how would Alma Jnr. know....

[jstephens9]

We have really got off the track of the original question here....but its been great discussion just the same....

Back to the original question.....Did Alma Jnr.know Ennis was gay?

In a nutshell........Crikey!....Ennis DID NOT KNOW he was gay.....so why or how would Alma Jnr. know....

Good point Katie!!! 

[Jeff Wrangler]

In a nutshell........Crikey!....Ennis DID NOT KNOW he was gay.....so why or how would Alma Jnr. know....

Yup, that's puttin' it in a nutshell all right! 

[Brown Eyes]

Good point Katie!!! 

   Yes, good point Katie!  Definitely. 

Although, it could be said that sometimes someone outside of oneself can see the person or situation more clearly than they can see themselves.  I think self-awareness is sometimes harder than figuring out someone else. 

I think there's little chance that Alma Jr. would have been capable of deducing all the aspects of Ennis's situation.  I'm guessing she may have had something like a hunch or some fuzzy ideas about what his situation might be.  She certainly wouldn't know the details and... she'd probably have no idea how hard things got for Ennis (and Jack) at times.

[Jeff Wrangler]

Although, it could be said that sometimes someone outside of oneself can see the person or situation more clearly than they can see themselves.  I think self-awareness is sometimes harder than figuring out someone else. 

Yes, it sure is. I have unlimited faith in the ability of human beings for self-deception, intentional or otherwise.

[jstephens9]

I don't think there is any way she could have known how hard it was for Jack and Ennis whether or not she suspected or did not suspect her father was gay. I actually still find it hard to imagine that she could have used the term "gay" for Ennis. Can you only imagine if Junior would have said "Daddy I know you are gay and that is ok?" Ennis would have said "I ain't queer."  I truly believe that the feelings Ennis had for Jack were things that he could have not put into one word such as "gay" or "queer" or whatever. They were feelings that Ennis did not know how to deal with in his mind. They were real feelings that I don't think Ennis could have found a word which would describe it. In fact, it may be that Junior understood him more than he understood himself.

[Katie77]

I don't think there is any way she could have known how hard it was for Jack and Ennis whether or not she suspected or did not suspect her father was gay. I actually still find it hard to imagine that she could have used the term "gay" for Ennis. Can you only imagine if Junior would have said "Daddy I know you are gay and that is ok?" Ennis would have said "I ain't queer."  I truly believe that the feelings Ennis had for Jack were things that he could have not put into one word such as "gay" or "queer" or whatever. They were feelings that Ennis did not know how to deal with in his mind. They were real feelings that I don't think Ennis could have found a word which would describe it. In fact, it may be that Junior understood him more than he understood himself.

I think the word he was looking for was  "LOVE"

[jstephens9]

Wow Katie you sure do have a way of hitting the nail on the head. Yeah that would be the word