Poll: Your opinion on Jake's silence

[MilAn]

And really, would Heath want or expect anything more from him?

I honestly don't know since i did not (in Heath's case)/don't know both men personally!

[Brown Eyes]

Really, even if every other person who has ever remotely known Heath has paid some sort of public tribute to him, it doesn't mean Jake is required to, also.

And really, would Heath want or expect anything more from him?

Right.  But, it does make Jake's omission from the list of tribute-makers glaring since these two were so associated with each other as public figures.

And, like Milan said, it's truly hard to know how to speculate about Heath's wishes in this regard.  It is also hard to speculate what the situation would be like if the circumstances were reversed (this hypothetical has also come up before in this long-running discussion).

[ednbarby]

True.  But most people who really cared about someone who has died generally try to do what they think that person would have wanted, no?

Of course I can't truly know this in Jake's case, but it's the general truth, isn't it?  Doesn't it stand to reason that if Heath had been the kind of person who would have expected all his closest friends and colleagues to eulogize him, Jake would have done that just out of respect for him?

I'm not trying to get those of you who are disappointed in Jake where this is concerned to change your feelings on the matter.  They are what they are.  I'm just trying to explain where I'm coming from.  You see it as a glaring omission and conspicuous absense.  I understand that, but I don't see it that way.  That's all.

[MilAn]

I can just speak for myself, but if i died (hopefully not anytime soon), i certainly wouldn't have anything against if my family, friends and colleagues payed tribute and shared nice words about me.

If all the people who payed tribute to Heath chose not to do it instead, all we would have are those tabloid stories (i think which are mostly untrue anyway), those tributes provide a great counterpart and i'm very grateful to the people who did this, it certainly wasn't easy for a lot of them either, but i think they felt a kind of a responsibility to do it. And i respect that!
That's how i see it!

[Brown Eyes]

If all the people who payed tribute to Heath chose not to do it instead, all we would have are those tabloid stories (i think which are mostly untrue anyway), those tributes provide a great counterpart and i'm very grateful to the people who did this, it certainly wasn't easy for a lot of them either, but i think they felt a kind of a responsibility to do it. And i respect that!
That's how i see it!

I think this is a good point.

This is all such an difficult issue to work through.   I don't know why I keep finding myself worrying about this subject.  Some days I think I've gotten passed it, but then other days... like today... it weighs on me a lot.

I really don't know why it's so hard for me to let this go.

[MilAn]

I think this is a good point.

This is all such an difficult issue to work through.   I don't know why I keep finding myself worrying about this subject.  Some days I think I've gotten passed it, but then other days... like today... it weighs on me a lot.

I really don't know why it's so hard for me to let this go.

I think it's still pretty fresh and i think this thread is great, so we all can share our thoughts about this subject. I think in a couple of months we won't think about this that much anymore. We will have to accept that he chose not to say anything and move on evantually. There is nothing we can do about it anyway! 

[Brown Eyes]

I think it's still pretty fresh and i think this thread is great, so we all can share our thoughts about this subject. I think in a couple of months we won't think about this that much anymore. We will have to accept that he chose not to say anything and move on evantually. There is nothing we can do about it anyway! 

I think you're right about all this still seeming rather new and raw.  And, sure enough, there's nothing to be done about it.

 

[ednbarby]

I can just speak for myself, but if i died (hopefully not anytime soon), i certainly wouldn't have anything against if my family, friends and colleagues payed tribute and shared nice words about me.

If all the people who payed tribute to Heath chose not to do it instead, all we would have are those tabloid stories (i think which are mostly untrue anyway), those tributes provide a great counterpart and i'm very grateful to the people who did this, it certainly wasn't easy for a lot of them either, but i think they felt a kind of a responsibility to do it. And i respect that!
That's how i see it!

I don't think Heath would have anything *against* the folks who did pay tribute so far - of course he wouldn't.  I'm just saying I don't think, from all I've read about him, that he was the kind of person who expected people to.

Ultimately, Jake responded in a way that felt right for Jake.  Again, the thought occurs to me that maybe it was/still is just too plain difficult a subject for him to address in a public way at this time - even just in the form of a eulogizing statement.  I can understand that and don't feel disappointed in him for it.  He's human just like the rest of us.  When my Mom died suddenly, and not unlike the manner in which Heath died, I couldn't talk about it with anyone - couldn't even mention her name - for months.  Had I been asked to eulogize her during that time, I would have turned and run.  And that was my mother, and the best friend I've ever had or ever will have.  When people expressed their sympathy at work and elsewhere later, all I could manage was to mutter an Ennis-like "thank you" while purposely avoiding meeting their eyes, because I knew if I did and saw the caring there, I'd break down.  And I wasn't ready to break down.  I guess this is why I understand him on this one.  I really don't think he's remained silent out of pure selfishness.  I think he's remained silent out of the inability to express himself properly where this is concerned.

[rnmina]

You'd think a rich actor like Jake could afford better doctors and treatment! 

 You know I didn't drop over to have a give and take discussion about Jake's money or his choice of health care providers. I have no interest in those issues. When I came over last week, I was shocked to see a poll  being conducted  about Jake; about  deeply personal and intimate issues;his grief over Heath and whether he should or should not have made a statement. I decided to post.

Healing encompasses  more than just money.  Rich people die just as fast as poor people depending on the cause of the illness.  Any musculoskeletal injury  still causing problems after 4 days is going to become a problem,  and  will require various modalities to heal properly, i.e. Game Ready which has to be prescribed by a doctor.

 You can be as rich as Croesus,  but if you injure yourself on March 12, and you are still not  back to normal by March 16-17,  you will need to pursue other modalities to heal properly. The four day rule always works.
It seems that some posters here are angry, upset  and put out with Jake--I know what snark is-- so I will not come back here. We've lost one of our boys  and we need to thank God that we have one  of the BBM male actors left. None of us is promised tomorrow and I can't do this.
 Enough  is enough.
s

[MsMercury]

Snark? I haven't seen any snark.