Wow, you managed to sum up my very first reaction to BBM after my first theater viewing. I remember walking out of the cinema thinking, "that was a really sad movie... BUT, those guys were incredibly lucky!" That's the amazing thing about the ending... it's happy and tremendously sad all at the same time. Happy in that, I at least came away thinking that for them to have found each other and to have had 20 years was wonderful (even if their love was contrained by lots of obstacles... there's no doubt that they did love each other... and this is doubly confirmed by Ennis's "Jack I swear..."). And well, we all know the million reasons why it's sad too. For me maybe the greatest tragedy is the lost time/ regret that Ennis will have to "stand" now that Jack is gone. They could have had so much more consistent time over those 20 years...
I think what all of you have said ... jpwagoner, littlewing, and atz75 .... hits the nail on the head. This film is tragic, yet it illustrates an enduring and passionate love. How many people do you know who have been able to stay together for 20 years? Not many. The rarity to find someone who can understand you and truly
knows you is a gift.
They loved each other. They were not just "in" love with each other. It sounds like semantics, but IMO, it's not. To love someone is to love all parts of the person ... the good, the bad, the ugly .... to work through the hard times, and to be dedicated to each other no matter what happens. When I hear the saying "in love," that means a person can easily fall out of love. And, although Jack said, "I wish I knew how to quit you," the reality was he couldn't ... his love for Ennis was too strong. (sigh .... I wish I knew what that was like!!!)