Poll: Your opinion on Jake's silence

[Shasta542]

What's Game Ready?

It's an ice/heat pack system for sports injuries:

http://www.gameready.com/

[MilAn]

God knows why I have to open my mouth and I'm never here except when I lurk and enjoy myself reading.
I still can't breath when I think about Heath's leaving us. I have a huge lump in my throat now while I'm trying to write this.

I'm not a doctor but I am a  licensed  health care professional and I show you Jake's grief... his pretty serious ankle injury and his accompanying Game Ready.
Family and close friends of a deceased person often show sighs of grief via accidents and injuries. I'm not surprised that Jake has a serious injury and this may not be all that he s suffering.
When my mother died I followed her wishes to her neighbors great chagrin. She made me promise when she was lucid not to allow anyone in her apt if it wasn't up to her strict standards...I didn't. When I called her friends and they told me they would be right over I  said NO.
Some of them still don't speak to me and  I could care less. I had a memorial for her and tried to do things as she wished.
I respect Jake's right to grieve as he wishes though I do worry that he needs to let it out...perhaps he will one day. I also know that Heath and Jake were the closest of friends...Jake is Matilda's Godfather and it has been reported elsewhere in Jakeverse that he is fulfilling his promises. Jake is a verbal open emotional person who is also deeply private and may even be paying homage to Heath by his very silence.

In a statement his PR stated that the injury wasn't serious. I, not a nurse or doctor, noticed that he doesn't always use the crutches and often he seems not to know how to use them. I've never been on crutches, but don't the docs or nurses have to teach you how to use them in the right way?

As for the friends of your mother who don't talk to you anymore. That's just low, they must understand it was your mom's wish and respect that.
As for Jake and Heath, i doubt anyone here knows (also the ones that claim to be in the know) how close they still were and what is going on.

[BlissC]

In a statement his PR stated that the injury wasn't serious. I, not a nurse or doctor, noticed that he doesn't always use the crutches and often he seems not to know how to use them. I've never been on crutches, but don't the docs or nurses have to teach you how to use them in the right way?

They should do, but don't always. Some years ago now I'd been using a walking stick for a couple of years before a physio thought to mention to me that I was doing it wrong - it'd never even occurred to me that there was a right or wrong way. Same thing back when I was at college and fell one night at a college disco and tore all the ligaments in my knee and got issued a pair of crutches by the hospital. Mind you, the emergency department was pretty hectic that night so I think they just wanted to get me out of there so they could get the next patient in!

[MilAn]

They should do, but don't always. Some years ago now I'd been using a walking stick for a couple of years before a physio thought to mention to me that I was doing it wrong - it'd never even occurred to me that there was a right or wrong way. Same thing back when I was at college and fell one night at a college disco and tore all the ligaments in my knee and got issued a pair of crutches by the hospital. Mind you, the emergency department was pretty hectic that night so I think they just wanted to get me out of there so they could get the next patient in!

You'd think a rich actor like Jake could afford better doctors and treatment! 

[ednbarby]

Chiming in late to say I voted with - and this is unusual for me - the vast majority.  I've believed all this time that Jake owes us, his fans, absolutely nothing when it comes to baring his personal, private pain, and he owes the media less than that.

I've always maintained that artists, in general, don't owe us anything except perhaps the best performance or piece that they can give at any given time.  And I don't even know that they owe us that.  But then that Protestant Work Ethic I was raised and regimented in rears its ugly head and tells me maybe they should feel they do.  OK, so perhaps they owe us the best work they can do.  Beyond that, they don't owe us Jack.  So to speak.

[Brown Eyes]

I agree that Jake doesn't owe us anything.  But, this question isn't all about us either.  And, it's not about his private pain or personal grief. 

I've said from the beginning that if it was an intrusive effort by paparazzi to try to capture Jake's private emotions... that would be entirely inappropriate and something I would never want to see happen.

I do think it's entirely appropriate to expect a eulogy for Heath.  It's about eulogizing a friend and one of his most significant colleagues in his career.

I still find his silence very perplexing, especially in light of gestures other colleagues have felt moved to make.

Also, just to re-iterate an interesting point made at some point earlier in this long-running discussion about "what's up with Jake" and the issue of tributes in general...

How would we feel if none of Heath's colleagues made the tributes and eulogies that they did?  Clearly, Ang Lee, Anne Hathaway, Michelle Williams, Daniel Day Lewis, etc. also didn't owe us anything either in terms of a statement. So in an extreme hypothetical scenario there could have been no eulogies by Heath's filmmaking/celebrity colleagues, etc.  But, of course, there are now so many tributes by professional colleagues, friends and family  that there is a big thread here all about that.  I think having those tributes out there is important to honoring Heath and those tributes seem important to many folks here on this forum.  To me Jake continues to feel like a glaring omission amongst the list of tribute-makers.

[serious crayons]

When my mother died recently, the hospice nurse was very helpful afterward. My brother and I would ask her, "Should we do such and such?" and she would reply, "Whatever is best for you. Some people do X, some people do Y. Whatever you feel most comfortable with is what you should do."

Everybody grieves in their own way, she said. There is no right or wrong.

[ednbarby]

I agree that Jake doesn't owe us anything.  But, this question isn't all about us either.  And, it's not about his private pain or personal grief. 

I've said from the beginning that if it was an intrusive effort by paparazzi to try to capture Jake's private emotions... that would be entirely inappropriate and something I would never want to see happen.

I do think it's entirely appropriate to expect a eulogy for Heath.  It's about eulogizing a friend and one of his most significant colleagues in his career.

I still find his silence very perplexing, especially in light of gestures other colleagues have felt moved to make.

Also, just to re-iterate an interesting point made at some point earlier in this long-running discussion about "what's up with Jake" and the issue of tributes in general...

How would we feel if none of Heath's colleagues made the tributes and eulogies that they did?  Clearly, Ang Lee, Anne Hathaway, Michelle Williams, Daniel Day Lewis, etc. also didn't owe us anything either in terms of a statement. So in an extreme hypothetical scenario there could have been no eulogies by Heath's filmmaking/celebrity colleagues, etc.  But, of course, there are now so many tributes by professional colleagues, friends and family  that there is a big thread here all about that.  I think having those tributes out there is important to honoring Heath and those tributes seem important to many folks here on this forum.  To me Jake continues to feel like a glaring omission amongst the list of tribute-makers.

Yes.  But many of his other colleagues have also chosen not to say anything.  I haven't heard anything from Christian Bale (maybe I just missed it).  Or Terry Gilliam.  Or Billy Bob Thornton.  Or Todd Haynes.  Or Matt Damon.  Or his other siblings (beside his beloved sister Kate - didn't he have another brother and sister?)  There are many people who've known him intimately and/or worked with him closely who have chosen not to eulogize him for whatever reasons.  Why can't we respect that choice from Jake?  Perhaps he feels he can't properly put into words what Heath meant to him and so trying to would do him a disservice.  Or perhaps it's just too difficult in general.  As has been said here many times, most recently by Katherine, everyone deals with grief in his own way.  While I certainly would be comforted by a eulogy from Jake, as I've said, I can respect his choice not to make one.

[MilAn]

You should check out the tributes thread, there are a lot of tributes/quotes from Todd Hayness, he even dedicated Heath the ensemble award for IMT the whole cast and crew got. Christian Bale also payed tribute and recently did an interview, you can find it on youtube, where he talked about Heath. About Terry Gilliam i'm not sure, but i think he also said something.
About his sisters, all three sisters, Kate and the two half sisters, as well as the parents payed tributes. Wrote very moving eulogies!

[ednbarby]

OK, so I missed a few.   

Really, even if every other person who has ever remotely known Heath has paid some sort of public tribute to him, it doesn't mean Jake is required to, also.

And really, would Heath want or expect anything more from him?