ABCs at the Movies: The Doubles Round!

[southendmd]

Undoubtedly a low point in his career, Sir Michael starred with Steven Seagal in this Alaskan piece of crap.

A fun comment from IMDb:

In this Alaskan film, Joan Chen plays what is quite probably the last word in Sino-Eskimo snow bunnies.

Eskimo Joan represents the same sort of Hollywood confusion about racial boundary lines which saw Larry Fishburne play the Moor of Venice, and Jackie Chan cast to play the King of Pop in an upcoming TV movie. (I'm kidding about one of these.) Not to mention generations of Italian and Jewish Indians, and more white actors in blackface than there are seeds in a watermelon.

Joan is teamed here with Steven Seagal, quite probably the last word in inarticulate and extremely violent tree-hugging Buddhists. Sort of the Billy Jack of the Barents Sea. His jacket has more fringe on it than you'd see at a reunion concert by the Buffalo Springfield.

Together, they try to build a world where an interracial couple can be happy in an oomiak built for two.

A number of years ago, I spent nearly 8 seconds at a book-signing in the presence of Michael Caine. For each of those seconds, he was extremely personable. So it's a bit of a revelation for me seeing him playing his two-faced vicious Hun of a smooth oil company CEO. Old favourite John C. McGinley also appears against type as one of Caine's nastier henchthugs.

Finally, there's Seagal's direction which takes his film on this ecological walk through the woods which makes it all seem a little like Oliver Stone after too many days trapped in a sweatlodge.

It's so ridiculous I actually found myself enjoying the whole thing quite a bit.

[Fran]

Michael Caine played Ebenezer Scrooge in "The Muppet Christmas Carol."

=aside= Paul
J, K, L... O?   

[oilgun]

Michael Caine plays Lloyd Fellows

Plot:   Lloyd Fellowes is the director of a theatre company. He's desperately trying to get his production together, despite the best efforts of the cast, the crew, and Lady Luck. We follow the production from final rehersals, through opening night, and onto the tour: as with any group of actors forced to work closely together for any great length of time, romances and arguments are bound to break out. Quite often, what's happening on stage is nothing compared to what's happening backstage....

[memento]

Michael Caine played Mickey King is this film.

IMDB: Michael King is a seedy writer of sleazy pulp genre novels under a half dozen sensational pseudonyms whose ambition is to dictate 10,000 words per minute to stenographers a la Earle Stanley Gardner. He's recruited by the agent of Preston Gilbert, a quirky ex-Hollywood star currently living reclusively in exile in Malta, to help him write his biography. Despite being pursued by an enigmatic hit man, Gilbert has a large entourage of eccentrics and remains an inveterate practical joker. After Gilbert is eventually murdered by an apparent priest, King tries to stay alive himself while interacting with a variety of idiosyncratic characters including an ersatz princess, a henpecked clairvoyant, and a cross-dressing hit man.

[southendmd]

Sir Michael played Thomas Fowler in this film.

Plot:  An older British reporter vies against a young American for the affections of a Vietnamese beauty.

=aside= Paul
J, K, L... O?  

I plead insanity.  I have no idea what I was thinking.  Thanks for filling in the letters.

[Fran]

Michael Caine played Lewis Fielding in "The Romantic Englishwoman."

From IMDb:  Ah, she is romantic. And he is jealous. And Helmut Berger is a cad. But you'll forgive all in this movie that begins in Baden Baden and ends in lost hope. No one dies though all suffer in some way. Hey, in this, it's just like real life. Romantic Englishwomen everywhere, if you ever wanted to run away from it all with a beautiful young man, this movie is your life.

[oilgun]

Michael Caine plays the title character, Billy "Shiner" Simpson.

Plot:   Billy Simpson is a shady boxing promoter in South London banned from legitimate fights. It's the biggest day of his life, though, because he has a champion on his hands, his 20-year-old son, Eddie. Billy's put all his money on a victory, as have his quarreling daughters. But Eddie is nervous, an odd guy in a cap is hanging about, the licensed promoter Billy has hired to arrange the evening's other fights has hired dogs, the manager of Eddie's opponent looks down scornfully on Billy and on South London, and Scotland Yard wants to Billy in gaol for the death of a club brawler. When the night goes disastrously wrong, Billy tries to find out who double-crossed him

[southendmd]

Sir Michael starred with Cliff Robertson in this allegory of Vietnam.

Plot:  A WWII film set on a Pacific island. Japanese and allied forces occupy different parts of the island. When a group of British soldiers are sent on a mission behind enemy lines, things don't go exactly to plan. This film differs in that some of the 'heros' are very reluctant, but they come good when they are pursued by the Japanese who are determined to prevent them returning to base.

IMDb trivia:  Director Robert Aldrich refused Cliff Robertson's request to attend the 1969 Academy Awards ceremony, as a flight from the Philippines to Los Angeles and back would be too time-consuming. Robertson won the Oscar--for Charly (1968)--and the crew presented him with a mock statuette made out of wood. According to Turner Classic Movies host Robert Osborne, after the Philippine location shooting was over, Academy of Motion Pictures Arts & Sciences President Gregory Peck greeted the cast as it disembarked at Los Angeles International Airport. Robertson was holding his fake Oscar when he got off the plane. As he was approached by Peck with the real statuette, Robertson threw the wood "Oscar" over his shoulder. The fake Oscar hit Michael Caine in the forehead, and caused him to bleed profusely.

[Ellemeno]

[

I plead insanity.  I have no idea what I was thinking.  Thanks for filling in the letters.

You could plead the weather's insanity, it sounds crazy where you are.

[southendmd]

You could plead the weather's insanity, it sounds crazy where you are.

Sure enough.  I got drenched to the bone at 6am and again tonight, trying to make like a beaver and dam.  I heard someone got killed in a tornado in New Hampster. 

My brain is water-logged.