Cellar Scribblings

[serious crayons]

Well, I've made several friends in my apartment building. We've gathered a few times on the rooftop deck in the evening for a glass of wine in this nice summery weather.

Then a few days ago I met John, a guy about my age who's blind -- or legally so, anyway. We met when he asked me to help him find the fitness room. He had just moved in, but needed actual step-by-step guidance because the room was only about 30 feet away. Then we both attended a Wine Down Wednesday event in the lobby and I introduced him to one of the women. He's also indicated an interest in rooftop deck gatherings.

He's not a romantic prospect -- he has a significant other who has the same eye disease he does, he said. But he moved to the building specifically because it's large enough he figured there'd be people he could ask for help. For example, he offered to take me to dinner Sunday in the downstairs restaurant if I show him the way to get there by back stairs without going outside (which I don't actually know but will figure out between now and then).

There's a big park behind the building that he might enjoy, but I realized he could never get there the way I do, which is down some stairs and then down a hill. Even I have trouble because the stairs are that stupid poured-concrete kind where some of the stairs are normal width, so just one step per stair, and some are wide, so require two steps, and they're randomly combined. Why do they do those? Surely there'd be a way around it. And the hill is too steep even for my taste -- I take my dog out there, but it feels unsteady and uncomfortable standing on it. This property belongs to the apartment building, I think, and if so they should fix it -- turn the hill into flat terraced area or something. This way seems like lawsuit potential.

However, I'm pretty sure there's a longer but flatter way to go around to the park.

It's been interesting talking to this guy, John. He's very easygoing about his disability, and doesn't hesitate to ask for guidance. Makes you realize how hard it would be to get around without sight. To get to his apartment, for example, he has to feel the hallway wall and count the doors.

[Sason]

What does it mean that he's legally blind?

[Front-Ranger]

Wow what trippy bathrooms!

[serious crayons]

What does it mean that he's legally blind?

He's permitted by law to be blind. Being blind is against the law unless you have a license.
-
 

No, it means he can see a little bit -- maybe light or vague shapes? - but not well enough to drive. I'm not sure what else besides driving would be involved in the legality part. I think some people who are legally blind can see enough to function fairly well otherwise. John does not seem to be in that category.

From what I gather, he has a degenerative disease that began in midlife. So now he's learning to live without sight, which I would think would be harder than it is for people who were born without sight.

Once at work I received a book in the mail that was a collection of essays by local people who had gone blind in midlife. It didn't fit into my beat, so I took it over to the lifestyle editor and suggested it could make a good story. She shrugged noncommittally.

"Is it any good?" she said.

"I don't know, I didn't read it," I said, inwardly thinking, Who the hell cares if it's good or not? Interviewing people in that situation would be interesting!

She didn't do the story.

[Sason]

He's permitted by law to be blind. Being blind is against the law unless you have a license.

Wouldn't surprise me in the least 

No, it means he can see a little bit -- maybe light or vague shapes? - but not well enough to drive. I'm not sure what else besides driving would be involved in the legality part. I think some people who are legally blind can see enough to function fairly well otherwise. John does not seem to be in that category.

I see.

We just call it either blind or visually impaired.

[serious crayons]

Wouldn't surprise me in the least 


I see.

We just call it either blind or visually impaired.

We use those terms, too, but "legally blind" is somewhat more specific. Blind means blind, visually impaired could mean totally blind, whereas "legally blind" specifically means not totally blind.

I asked John if it's harder to adjust to blindness in midlife than it would be to be born blind. Yes, in some ways, he said. On the other hand, having previously been able to see lets you understand what sight means. If you've never been able to see, you would have no concept of what "light" or "green" or other vision-related references even mean. They'd be totally abstract.

Speaking of John, when we went out the other night I learned two unfortunate things. One is that he DID have a girlfriend, but they broke up. So when we were sitting there at dinner, it gradually dawned on me that we were on a date. Later, he asked me to come into his room (no), join him in the fitness room the next afternoon (no) go up to the roof for a drink the next night (yes, but I also invited another neighbor, Sandy).

He's very nice and reasonable intelligent, a former lawyer, and blindness alone might not be a deal-breaker. But it got worse. He identifies as conservative.

Even that might possibly be acceptable. I hate to be too partisan, and John seems pretty mildly conservative. This came up when he said he was changing his mind on the death penalty -- used to be a supporter, which isn't great, but then he revealed that he ... oh, it's so horrible I can't even say it. Put it this way: he strongly dislikes Hillary Clinton, so ...

He also turns out to believes a few of those really cockamamie conservative myths. For example, he thinks the Biden administration is flying immigrants up from the border and establishing them in cities around the country so they'll vote for Democrats and can get on Medicaid. I spent five minutes googling to establish that neither of these is true: the Biden admin has flown immigrants to other states for processing because the border is so overwhelmed with traffic, but then is returning illegal ones to Mexico. Illegal immigrants are not eligible for Medicaid.

He thinks most unvaccinated people are Black. No. Most unvaccinated people are Republicans.

He'd been emailing me, so I returned the email with links to an article in the Washington Post, statistics from Kaiser research, etc. He wrote back that he is skeptical of "the news" these days.

Deal-breaker.

[Jeff Wrangler]

He thinks most unvaccinated people are Black. No. Most unvaccinated people are Republicans.

   (Are you sure that's not a liberal myth?  )

[serious crayons]

  (Are you sure that's not a liberal myth?  )

   Kaiser Family Foundation has stats!

Yesterday I was discussing all this on the phone with my son, when mid-rant I noticed my phone had gone dead. I plugged it in and waited for the battery to charge enough that I could call or text an explanation.

A text from my son popped up. "You all good? Did the libs get you?'

 


 

[Sason]

We use those terms, too, but "legally blind" is somewhat more specific. Blind means blind, visually impaired could mean totally blind, whereas "legally blind" specifically means not totally blind.

I see (no pun intended).

[Front-Ranger]

...He wrote back that he is skeptical of "the news" these days.

Deal-breaker.

Remember, he is on his best behavior and trying to make a good impression. Think about what it would be like if he were his natural self!

I know, I married a Republican-in-Democrat-disguise. I only found out the truth in 2000, when our children were teenagers.