Heath Ledger - the grieving thread

[Shasta542]

I really like that idea, Katie77. I will think about it and post when I decide what to put up to remind me of Heath. Thanks.  {{{{{{{SUE}}}}}}}

{{{{{{{DEV}}}}}}} Glad you liked it, Dev. I liked the way it was divided into the different sections.

[ptannen]

Andrew, big hug, to you, Bud.  It feels like you have once again pulled a rained-on hat from out of the blustery street, this time mine.  Like you have the tokens already in pocket to get us to the better place we want to go.  (Can you tell I was vicariously on that Boston adventure to the best of my ability?) 

Boy, that really brings back my fond memories of Boston and wahat a great host Andy was!  

[Front-Ranger]

Great to see Andrew again, Pete, and Anya Anjie!!

[Rayn]

From John Donne's Meditation XVII

...All [hu]mankind is of one author, and is one volume; when one man dies, one chapter is not torn out of the book, but translated into a better language; and every chapter must be so translated; ... God's hand is in every translation, and his hand shall bind up all our scattered leaves again for that library where every book shall lie open to one another. 

Lovely....     Donne is so rich and full of texts that apply to our situation and to daily living.  Thank you, malina, for this meditation.

[Rayn]

When I feel this lonesome prairie wind
I let my soul get back to you again
I will never let you, I will never let you, I will never let you go.

LauraGigs, this pic of Ennis...  I've always thought it was so "all about" Ennis, an emblem of Ennis, because it says so much about his character throughout the movie....  tough, brooding, dark, solitary, remote, rocky, simple, earthy, the rider and survivor of storms, alone, but also searching for safety, aware of his surroundings, in touch with nature.  It's so like him especially in the beginning of the story.   I always remember Jack's worried look too when Ennis rides off without a word just before this shot of him. Thanks for posting it, it's one of my fav of him, and it helps me to think of Ennis, at least, as alive.     
                         

Lyrics by Gustavo Santaolalla/Jeremy Spillman
from the Brokeback Mountain soundtrack

[/left]

[jstephens9]

I had a hard time knowing where to post this. I thought about my blog, but then it wouldn't get read by as many people. I thought about Heath, Heath, Heath and then for some reason the grieving thread seemed like the best place.

Although I did not know if I should or how it would effect me, I watched Brokeback today on HBO for the first time since Heath's passing. It took a lot to watch it, but somehow I made it through. I felt that since it was on HBO, even though I own more than one copy of the DVD, I should watch it as a tribute to Heath. Believe it or not, I even recorded it so now I have another DVD of it. I notated on the DVD that it was recorded today from HBO as a tribute to Heath. Somehow it just seemed important. I felt that in ways I was watching the movie in a new way. It seemed that I was paying so much attention to all of Ennis' expressions even more than I have before. It was a very sad and hard experience watching it, lots of tears, but I did make it through. I couldn't help but wonder how much Heath in real life was holding in and if he was truly unhappy. I think he was such a complicated man much the same way that Ennis was. Ennis was quite simple on the outside, but there was so much inside, so much that we never really saw cause he kept it all in. And I'm not even talking much about the gay part of Ennis. I am talking about everything about Ennis. It has always been difficult for me to think of Ennis as gay since it always felt to me that it was more about love for him. A love that he could never completely break down and express to Jack. Anyway, although I watched the movie early this afternoon it has been racing through my head ever since. I feel worn out much the same way that watching Brokeback has always made me feel. The intensity this time was the same, but somehow different, somehow much more intense.

This evening I finally got my Brokeback 2008 calendar up. I don't know why it took me so long. January is a picture of the dozy embrace. I thought about how it was Heath who had made the suggestion to reverse the shirts for the scene at the end of the movie. That has always impressed me so much that he made that suggestion. And for whatever reason I thought more about that today. The idea that Ennis, suggested by Heath, placed the shirts so that he would always be in a sense wrapped around Jack. In looking at the picture of the Dozy Embrace on the calendar I saw the shirts in a similar way. Ennis is wrapped around Jack from the back in much the same way that the shirts are placed together in Ennis' closet. Wrapped around Jack for all of eternity.

Jack

[Brown Eyes]

I felt that in ways I was watching the movie in a new way.

Thank you for that really lovely post Jack.  I had a similar experience watching BBM on Friday.  It was like watching it with fresh eyes.  Hope you're doing alright Bud.

[Katie77]

Yes, know how you feel Jack....I wrote much the same in my post after I watched BBM a couple of nights ago.....

I too, scrutinized Ennis a lot more, looked for Heathisms in him.....

Also related a lot of the words, and scenes to the way we have been feeling over the past couple of days.

I even looked for guidance, of how Ennis dealt with Jack's death, to help with dealing with Heath's.

Thank you for sharing your thoughts.

[BelAir]

Yes, I probably dissapear because my grief was really huge and I couldn't control it. But today it is slightly better. I am feeling little better. I just know I love him and nobody will take this from me with his passing. My love for him lives on. I am gonna calming myself with the ideas how great of a legend he will become and that he will be forever remembered. Not to sound pathetic, I just hope so.

don't you worry, he will indeed be forever remembered, and he will indeed be a great legend...

[SFEnnisSF]

A track from Brokeback Mountain Radio: