~~THE PERFORMANCE THREAD~~ **aside** ((action)) %%thought%%

[Daniel]

** If only it had been like that. Mr. Indapaddock. Instead I got something that looked like this. **



** Note that such cooking is now labeled as a biological hazard. **

[alec716]

((TERRY CLOTH, perched on his Golden Rack in his offset hiding place, has narrowly escaped discovery by UNSCRUPULOUS eBAY TRADERS roaming B.A.M. in search of discarded casting couches and banana peels.  He keeps an eye on the developments from afar as he contemplates a possible return to the B.A.M. production.)) 

%%  The peace and feng shui of the Sacred Relic Room do feel tempting... and I am remembering that Buddha as kind of hot in retrospect... but maybe there is still a little too much action going on onset for me to retain my freshly-laundered status... and JACK's PANTS probably used the last of that great jasmine & lavender soap.  I'd better just keep watching to see how things go.  %%

[Lumière]

** If only it had been like that. Mr. Indapaddock. Instead I got something that looked like this. **



** Note that such cooking is now labeled as a biological hazard. **

%%
Hmmm...Gotta think up some delicious banana recipes to share with these cowboys...

Maybe ...



Hmm...No!  Maybe ...fried bananas on sticks....



Hmmm...No..
Pancakes ....!  They could do that easily...



Come to think of it, if they eat the bananas as sensuously as YOUNG JACK just demonstrated, who needs to cook 'em? 
Ah, fack it!!

%%

[FuzzyChanny]

**Unbeknowingst to Jack and Ennis, the banana trees were planted by CHILEAN SHEEPHERDER #1 and CHILEAN SHEEPHERDER #2 to help them recreate their native habitat and cuisine on Brokeback Mountain!**

((SHEEPHERDERS #1 and #2 arrive at the site of the banana trees on their burros and see that their precious bananas are gone!!))


SHEEPHERDER #1: IQue'?  IQue'?  IQue'? Ay, Caramba!!

**My Goodness, I believe that to be my cue**

SHEEPHERDER #2: Arriba Arriba!!

[Becky]

*Elk decides she doesn't know what she is supposed to be doing so does Charleston across the set just to confuse everyone. She is also pleased with the decision to use Bananas instead of being shot! *

*Elk then decides she is going to do her other role and pees on Chliean sheep herder 2's foot!  Ahhh thats better. Peeing sheep/elk is pleased with her acting skills*

[Lumière]

*Elk then decides she is going to do her other role and pees on Chliean sheep herder 2's foot!  Ahhh thats better. Peeing sheep/elk is pleased with her acting skills*

** Good job Peeing Sheep! Excellent as usual ... **




** Now you can go play with yer best friend ... **



** Go on!  Go after him before he goes too far!!    **

[alec716]

*Elk then decides she is going to do her other role and pees on Chliean sheep herder 2's foot!  Ahhh thats better. Peeing sheep/elk is pleased with her acting skills*

((Still perched on his Golden Rack and watching from afar, heartily applauding ELK's flawless and spirited Charleston... ))

TERRY CLOTH:

%%  I am thrilled by this potential move toward veganism on the boys' part and by ELK's resultant increased chances of survival, but that pee-on-shoe number gives me further pause about going back onset ... what to do, what to do??!  %%

[DeeDee]

%%  The Boss has done it again!
I wonder if his 'casting on the couch' skills are THIS excellent .. Hmmm..
%%

Um...I could vouch for that

[Front-Ranger]

**Peeing on demand. That's just as difficult as crying on demand. I only know one other actress who could pull it off--Nicole Kidman in Eyes Wide Shut. You're in exalted company, peeing sheep!!**

[David]

%%  Nicole Kidman could pee on demand?  %%