Mandy and Front-Ranger,
Such truly kind and hert felt words, thankyou so much. I have had such a bad time with my oldest son, but over the past about 2 weeks, I have watched in ever increasing awe, as my younger son has gradually worked some sort of magic on him.I have had to bite the bullet with the really expensive 2nd set of meds.Having realised that after 3 days without them, he was horrendous.So I have dropped 2 of mine to allow him to continue.
The real magic though has been Matt. I don't know what it is about that boy, but he really does bring light into peoples lives.People of all ages gravitate towards him. Recently, he has spent all his time in between tennis with his brother, and the change is incredible.He literally walks taller, and looks lighter.I think what Matt has done, is let himself be seen as looking up to his older brother.In return the oldest has started to bask in the warmth of being seen as a role model.
I burst into tears the other day when I overheard Matt say to him, you must not smoke or do any other stuff like that again.Look how much better it has been here, since you started being nice to mom.!!! I even heard her say on the phone the other day, how nice it was to have you around, so you know dude, you seriously shouldn't blow that now.The older one said something I could not quite hear, but it must have been about me, because Matt said, she's mom she forgives everything.Who do you think wrote that letter from father Xmas, but don't let her know we know.The tears were in free flow by this stage.The oldest then said, but I did stop being frightened of spiders, and her blood pressure did go down. Matt just said why don't you ever listen, mom can always make it O.K again.Look what she did when you had your panic attack and thought you were dying.I had to creep off at this stage, I was crying so much.
Someone once said Matt should be handed out free on prescription, and it annoys me that I can't remember who, but it is true.Watch this space because I do truly believe he will do something amazing one day, don't know what, but it will be something.
I know this is the wrong place to be posting this, but it does all really tie in with Heath.There is something about Matt, that is like Heath.People just really like him,old young, male female, straight gay. He leaves an impression.Even I can't tell you what it is.
He just weaves magic.Only a short time ago, I was just going to call it quits with my oldest, and now Matt has given me my son back.We have progressed so much that the oldest yesterday, rang my husband and said why don't we meet for a quick snack after work.He asked Matt if he wanted to come and Matt just said no, I think it would be really good for you and dad to have some time.My husband was speechless when he got the call.
I have only hesitated to post in case I jinxed it all.
But I do truly see a Heath/joker connection.Matt is like Heath, entrancing all those he meets, and my oldest is a bit like the joker, but caught at an earlier stage. He is deeply damaged by the illness, but not beyond all hope.The right person, in this case his brother, can cut through it all, to the central core which still burns brightly.
In a very surreal leap, I feel that the one person who could have "saved" the joker would have been Heath.That is why he can play the role with such consumate skill.
I now truly believe that Matt, who is the son my husband was told he would never have, was given to us, in part to help heal his sick brother.
Wherever my thoughts take me though, they still arrive back at Heath and/or BBM.My ability to reach out to so many people and get so much help and advice,stems ultimately from BBM
The sympathy that the joker engenders in me, is then in part as said before, brought on by the recognition that he once was probably a human with deep emotions and feelings, who becomes psychopathic by circumstance not revealed to us.My son has been caught earlier, and has been given the gift of a brother who has an infinite capacity for forgiveness and the ability to see the good in pretty well everyone. He has certainly taught me some lessons recently.They even shared the same Xbox rented game and the oldest let Matt have first turn, unbelievable.
I am constantly caught off guard by the legacy of Heath, the person, the actor and BBM.If you only change one persons life for the better, you have done well.The numbers affected for the better by Heath are numerous, and will continue to grow through the legacy of his films.