Author Topic: THE PERFORMANCE THREAD aside ((action)) %%thought%% (Read 1704890 times)

welliwont · « **Reply #1920 on:** August 07, 2006, 03:28:51 pm »

MEMO

TO: Guy Raphaelson, Lucise Indapaddock
FROM: JT CD
CC: FSD

Hey Guy and Lucise, can you please ensure that you include a mimeograph* copy of the operating instructions as posted by Feng in each shipment? We want to negate any possible liability here...

tks, JT

*mimeograph: the forefather of the photocopy machine. (This *is* 1963 here, is it not???)

Mikaela · « **Reply #1921 on:** August 07, 2006, 04:42:32 pm »

MIKA THE DUMBASS MUSICAL MULE:

((Mika is very worried over YOUNG ENNIS and YOUNG JACK, and whether they'll survive going their separate ways, if such is their fate. The mule hopes for the best, but sadly suspects that the future may be bleak.......))

((MIKA is however even *more* worried at the recent product development efforts.))

**Frankfurter converter? Won't the next logical step then be to produce the Frankfurters and Wieners to be converted? And HOW are Frankfurters made, I ask you? What ingredients are needed? Haven't I heard YOUNG ENNIS mutter to me more than once: MIKA, the sausage factory is too good for you!**

((MIKA stomps feet in fear and horror, brays mournfully:))

Hey, LSP HORSE and CIGAR BUTT, are you guys aware that there's no more use for us till next year? What if the company decides to make us an immediate part of their product development fervour instead? Tell ya what, I won't stand for this here lousy end to my fine-tuned services!

((Spotting the stable door opening, MIKA feels sure that a one-way transport to the factory of no return is waiting right outside.

In a panic, the musical mule manages to tear the halter rope, and free of all restraints bounds through the door - taking off down the road at breakneck speed for parts yet unknown!))

Yeeee-haw!

Daniel · « **Reply #1922 on:** August 07, 2006, 04:53:00 pm »

GUY RAPHAELSON:

((Speaking through bullhorn from a helicopter marked with the Un Ltd logo))

**Attention, all horses and mules!!! Broken Arsed Frankfurters are quality products made from non-equine materials.**

opinionista · « **Reply #1923 on:** August 07, 2006, 05:01:51 pm »

Quote from: Daniel on August 07, 2006, 04:53:00 pm

GUY RAPHAELSON:

((Speaking through bullhorn from a helicopter marked with the Un Ltd logo))

**Attention, all horses and mules!!! Broken Arsed Frankfurters are quality products made from non-equine materials.**

((The blue healers just heard about the Frankfurters and are pissed because no one has given them some))

Bluehealer 1: ((Loud noise of a stomach growling)) Frankfurters? Someone said Frankfurter?
Bluehealer 2: Yeah, the dumbass mule was having some just now
Bluehealer 1: What about us?!?! We don't get paid and on top of that, no frankfurters!
Bluehealer 3: Life's a bitch isn't it?
Bluehealer: Life or the people running this show?
Bluehealer 2. Shut up! we're gonna be fired
Bluehealer 1: And so what? We 're done with our job, and I remind you that Jack and Ennis didn't do shit, we had to do it all, and we didn't get paid. FRANKFURTERS FOR US NOW!!! FRANKFURTERS, FRANKFURTERS!!
Bluehealer 2, 3: Shut up!
Bluehealer 1. The hell I'm gonna shut up. WE WANT SOME FRANKFURTES NOW!!
((Bluehealer 2,3 roll eyes))
Bluehealer: As soon as I'm getting MY Frankfurter, I ain't sharing it with you!
((Bluehealer 2,3 roll eyes again))

Mikaela · « **Reply #1924 on:** August 07, 2006, 05:06:31 pm »

MIKA:

((Hears terrifyingly loud helicopter noise approaching, and someone shouting something about Frankfurters. Hears the Blue Heelers yipping and barking loudly about Frankfurters too. ))

**They're all chasing me! Hunting me down! By land and air! They want me! They all know how delicious I'm bound to taste! I've gotta run faster! Faster! Faaaaster!!**

((Pounds down the road and is soon lost from sight - for now))

Daniel · « **Reply #1925 on:** August 07, 2006, 05:13:15 pm »

GUY RAPHAELSON:

((As Mika disappears into a forested region, he orders the helicopter down.))

**Drat! How are we going to sign her up for that compilation album?**

Mikaela · « **Reply #1926 on:** August 07, 2006, 05:36:52 pm »

MIKA:

((Not knowing that she risks missing out on the break-out performance opportunity of a life-time, the musical mule wanders through the woods all alone. The immediate risk of losing life and limb seems to be avoided for now, and poor MIKA returns to worrying over ENNIS and JACK. ))

%%I sure hope they're OK. They looked so down and so lost when they left us there at the jump-off point to return to Signal.%%

((Used to expressing feelings, hopes and wishes through song, MIKA starts ~~braying~~ crooning softly in the dusk:))

And now I’m all alone – how strange!
Nowhere to turn, no one to go to!
Without a home, none at close range,
no kindly face to say hello to....
The future does seem black -
And how I miss ENNIS and JACK!

((Sniffles))

I’ll have to walk alone this night
When everybody else is sleeping
I’ll think of them, and wish them well;
ponder the company they’re keeping.
I hope they go to bed
together, nothing left unsaid……..

((MIKA is a romantic and soft-hearted mule, and it shows!))

Lumière · « **Reply #1927 on:** August 07, 2006, 07:26:58 pm »

(( The woolies are off the mountain now, after a few hours of weeping under an oak tree, Lucise returns to his trailer and finds all the notes the Continuity Director has left for him. He gets on the phone with the CT .. ))

** Sure boss, the.. umm..mimeograph request has been duly noted! I will talk to Guy about that in a minute..
Okay .. No, everything is fine. Now that my sheep tending duties are over, I will be working with Guy full-time as Spokesman for our Broken Arse Woolen Ecstacy Line of products .. Sure thing .. Well, thanks for the memos Boss! .. yeah .. yeah .. okay, bye! **

%% WTF is a mimeograph ..

I guess I better call Guy right away! Can't wait to hear his voice again ... %%

(( Lucise dials the number he now knows by heart ..))

** Hello? Guy? Lucise here .. **

Daniel · « **Reply #1928 on:** August 07, 2006, 07:38:31 pm »

GUY RAPHAELSON:

((With the whirring of the helicopter blades above him, Guy can hardly hear the telephone ringing, but he left it on vibrate so he quickly goes to see who it is... Lucise's name flashes on the display. He flips it open and answers it, shouting to be heard.))

**Hello, Lucise!!! A lot of things have been coming up with the transition between locations!!! I have a lot of work to do tonight. Probably won't be in until much later tonight!!!** ((After a brief pause.)) **Can you wait for me???**

Lumière · « **Reply #1929 on:** August 07, 2006, 07:49:18 pm »

Quote from: Daniel on August 07, 2006, 07:38:31 pm

GUY RAPHAELSON:

((With the whirring of the helicopter blades above him, Guy can hardly hear the telephone ringing, but he left it on vibrate so he quickly goes to see who it is... Lucise's name flashes on the display. He flips it open and answers it, shouting to be heard.))

**Hello, Lucise!!! A lot of things have been coming up with the transition between locations!!! I have a lot of work to do tonight. Probably won't be in until much later tonight!!!** ((After a brief pause.)) **Can you wait for me???**

(( Lucise smiles at Guy's shouting ..))

** Geez .. quite the racket you got going on there? Sounds like a helicopter?!!
Sure, I'll wait for you .. We could have a late dinner or something, I'll cook!
Umm, in the mean time, I am ready to launch the next Broken Arsed Woolen Product, umm ..
Should I proceed with the launch or wait for you?
**

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